“In a thousand years, Gandahar was destroyed. A thousand years ago, Gandahar will be saved — and what can’t be avoided will be.”

[IMDB link] The last of the 3 feature-length animated sci-fi films directed by René Laloux — although Bob Weinstein stole the directing credit for the American Version, and removed 6.6 minutes of animated romance between the main character and the topless blue babe (dual naked kiss). Violence is allowed in America, but not sex. If you want blue boobs — live in France. This is also why Smurfette didn’t put out.

Anyway, I want to say that this is at least as good as Fantastic Planet, possibly better. I just don’t remember Fantastic Planet well enough. Read on for screenshots and a more thorough review.

This is about the only screenshot of the blue babe that fits within Virginia Tech’s acceptable usage policy.

René Laloux is an interesting character, having such a cult following over so many decides, despite having directed so few animated films. This was his 3rd, and arguably most polished effort. There were many strange alien species and phenomenon — more so than Time Masters — but not more than Fantastic Planet. Largely we had blueish humanoids, a group of rejected deformed who lived underground (as it usually goes with mutated folk), mysterious black metal men, and various species used as vehicles and housing. Weapons were all biological, but not in the way you would think on earth. One such weapon, for example, would grow like a tree, really fast over 10 seconds, then turn to stone. Sprinkle a field with these, and you essentially force ground troops to have to tunnel through stone to get to where they want to go.

The plot involved time travel, which is always a big plus for us! The prophecy goes something like this: “In a thousand years, Ganhadar was destroyed. A thousand years ago, Ganhadar will be saved — and what can’t be avoided will be.” Are you confused with the tense inversion? Well, the mutants speak “past future” tense — for semi-religious reasons. So instead of saying “I am eating”, they would say, “I was will be eating”. So get used to being confused.

The Deformed: You may have forgotten us, but we haven’t forgotten you.

There is a “God” in this movie … And the few moments of interaction with him are quite interesting. “They hear him, but he is not speaking!” Response: “Gods rarely speak.” Good point. Why vibrate the air with soundwaves, when you can simply beam your voice into someone’s brain? (By the way, This “God” was not quite omniscient.)

Yes, that’s a large ship down there at the bottom of these tendrils.

And of course: blue boobies. I mean, if you ever fantasized about Smurfette (which I didn’t), this might be a good way to release some of that subconsciously pent-up hot smurf lust.

But mostly: Cartoons, aliens, and time-travel — In the René Laloux style.

Getting stoned is less popular in Gandahar than it is in America.

There’s also a Gandahar MySpace page, with some clips. And René Laloux has a MySpace page as well, despite the fact that he died of a heart attack at the age of 74 in 2004.

Mood: hungry
Music: Ministry – Khyber Pass (Texas Bush Ranch Mix)