July 2008


This was one of the finest Rocky Horror showings I’ve ever been to. I held onto this blogpost draft for 14 months before deciding to just spooge the fragments out to the world without properly waiting. I mean, I saw Rocky Horror on the same approximate weekend the following year before ever posting this. So here goes… I am not attempting to make any coherent review here; just sharing info. (more…)

I have amassed a few quotes here and there. Some by me. Some by friends. Some famous quotes. Some random quotes. For a long time, simply stored these in quotes.txt.

Well, I had an idea — Turn quotes.txt into an RSS feed, so that everytime a new quote is added, it can show up in people’s readers.

And that’s what I did. You can subscribe to the “Clint‘s Quotes” RSS feed HERE.

For those still stuck in 2004 (i.e. those who don’t use RSS), the actual text file of quotes can be read HERE. But you’re screwed on updates — which is part of the point of RSS. I guess you can just check it every day for new ones? Ha ha ha, nobody would ever do that! Manually checking stuff is for suckas! That’s why I made this an RSS feed.

RSS is the most important technology since http and email. Go to Google Reader and paste http://clint.sheer.us/quotes/quotes-rss.xml into it for much better results.

WARNING: New subscribers will get an item for EVERY quote. Star them for later, mark them all as read, but don’t come whining to me about filling your RSS box :)

P.S.: To those already using our aggregated/managed feed, this feed was already incorporated several weeks ago. So no action is needed on your part.

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What a scumbag. Watch the video for yourself. This is an annual bike rally *to promot safety* for bicyclists. And Patrick Rogan’s first move after doing this? Arresting the guy for “attempted assault” (bullshit), and the 2 catch-all charges of “disorderly conduct” and “resisting arrest”, which any officer can give any human at any time and have it be sustained in most courts of law.

How was he obstructing traffic if he’s riding in a rally with 100s of other bikers? He seemed to be picked at random. The officer couldn’t have communicated with him prior to shoving him down, because he was on foot and would have been out of vocal range.

Asshole Officer Patrick Rogan had the gall to say that the bicyler tried to run him over. Judging from the video, he certainly seems to be a lying pig:

One bad cop ruins the good that 1000 good cops can do. Better for traffic to be obstructed than any american having a random chance of winning the police brutality lottery. This fucker should get his ass pounded in prison, and should be individual sued with no immunity by the biker. He should have to pay for any injuries out of his own pocket. But of course he wont. He’ll just get a new cop job in another state, like they almost always do. Come back to this post in a few months or years to see how it turned out.

LINK: http://wcbstv.com/local/cop.slams.biker.2.781944.html
BACKUP: http://www.badcopnews.com/2008/07/29/new-york-city-police-officer-patrick-pogan-placed-on-desk-duty-after-brutal-unprovoked-attack-on-bicyclist/
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 movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] Another comedy directed by Bob Odenkirk — I really had no idea that he had a directing career. For some reason I thought this was written by Daniel Waters, the writer of Heathers and Sex & Death 101. But it wasn’t. So this movie was pretty much a complete accident.

PEOPLE: Bob Odenkirk directs, as mentioned before. Michael Blieden wrote this, and stars as Melvin. He also directed Super High Me and had a guest spot in Arrested Development. Maura Tierney (from News Radio and E.R.) is in this too, but not as one of the main 4 characters. The other main characters were Stephanie Courtney (who was also in The Brothers Solomon, Tom Goes To The Mayor, Tim And Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!, Blades Of Glory, E.R., Celebrity Deathmatch, Angel, and Mr. Show), Matt Price (who was also in Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, Legally Blonde 2, and guested on Arrested Development), and Annabelle Gurtwitch (who has guested on various shows over the years, such as Boston Legal, Charmed, Suddenly Susan, Seinfeld, Dream On, Tales From The Crypt, Alien Nation, Murphy Brown, China Beach, and Miami Vice). Despite these people being involved in so many projects I am aware of, everyone in this movie was barely recognizable to me. Except Jenna Fischer (Pam from The Office [US]), who played a VERY minor part.

QUIRKS: On the surface, this movie is simply 4 people talking over dinner and drinks for the entire movie. Melvin only knows the 2nd person at the table, who only knows Melvin and the 3rd person, who only knows the 2nd person and the 4th person, who only knows the 3rd person. [highlight for spoilers] Or so we think… There is actually one person who knows another person in secret, and it is not revealed until mostly through the movie. Can you guess who? Also, this movie goes BACKWARDS at times. The chronology is quite scattered, and jumps back and forth in time. Scenes happen, and then previous scenes are played, exposing the motivations in the previous (but occurring chronologically later) scene. It was reminiscent of Memento, Rules Of Attraction, and other such chronologically twisted movies. At least 10% of the movie takes place outside the diner — but that is usually due to flashbacks.

BAD STUFF: There is a LOT of talk, and ZERO action. There was a very moving conversation about ghosts that, while quite compelling, didn’t really seem to belong in the movie. Again: LOTS of talk. And confusion. Time-based confusion, and motivation-based confusion. It’s a mystery of sorts too, in that there is a major twist mostly through the movie. This movie occurs completely in your head. If you want to sit back and watch action, fantasy, and boobies, this isn’t it…

RECOMMENDATION: …But if you like intense conversations with friends over drinks, and enjoy deep meaningful conversations about random topics from the metaphysical, to adultery, to anal sex… Then this movie might be for you. It is actually written quite well, and has some very cutting, edgy dialog. I’m actually surprised that Daniel Waters didn’t write this.

CONCLUSION: This was a lot better than we expected. Carolyn seemed to particularly like it. I want to say she wanted to give it an 8 or 9. Myself, I’d give it more like a 7 or an 8. It was definitely better than the “generic pass” that I give most movies I watch. This movie would actually be interesting to watch a 2nd time, knowing the secret twists and motivations behind all the characters.

MOVIE QUOTE: Joey: “This belief thing kills me. It’s like, all theological concepts are basically unprovable. So they invented faith. Which was genius!”

FRIENDS’ RATINGS: Glen really liked it. (more…)

This post is quite long, but chock full of good recommendations — especially for animation lovers. Plenty of live shows too. If I had time, I’d post each one of these as a separate review. But I’ll never have that kind of time.

I’ve started to move towards listing weirdest/rarest stuff first, and more common stuff later… After all, everyone can guess that I watch South Park

As far as awards go? Not sure. Best superhero endeavor is definitely Heroes. Best drama is Weeds. Funniest show is Tim & Eric, Awesome Show, Great Job!. Funniest cartoon is South Park — but Xavier:Renegade Angel has South Park completely beaten in ridiculousness, and Code Monkeys has South Park beaten in terms of freshness. As for live comedy, Sarah Silverman is funnier than Human Giant. Barely. But most of the good cartoons were funnier than anything live-action would have to offer.

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20080423 – Oranjello – 155-5513 – does NOT like his head brushed! (30s) (xvid) (20fps) (mono snd)

Originally uploaded by ClintJCL

He doesn’t mind it now, though.

baggy cutout vaginal

pouch rear snazzy? longfellow, ceil longfellow.
sodden conjoint predilect massacre scorpion conjoint, pouch
statesman rear dosimeter success lowland.

mysterious intact. (more…)

 movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] Yet another movie we’d both voluntarily ignored — for 14 years. But after my ex-co-worker with the most-similar-taste-ever Scott S swore by it, I decided to give it a chance and queued it. A couple years later it finally arrived at our house. IMDB rating is 6.5 so we had higher hopes than we had during some of the recent movies we’ve watched.

PEOPLE: Jim Carrey is one of those people who I think pretty much makes any movie he stars in (though there are exceptions). And Sean Young?! Again?! I didn’t know who she was, and we end up seeing 2 movies with her within a couple weeks. [highlight for spoilers] And she plays a woman that is really a man in both movies! And Courteney Cox as well! And… Tone Loc?!?!? WTF?!?!? Remember “Wild Thing”?

QUIRKS: Jim Carrey did his usual extreme-craziness, often with hilarious results. But he still seemed to fall flat in a few places. Sometimes his funniness just came off as annoying — which is not how we usually perceive him. Maybe it was more novel in 1994.

BAD STUFF: Football. It starred a bunch of football people that I couldn’t give two shits about. At least the plot itself did not revolve around the game football — or I would have been severely disappointed. It did revolve around football athletes, however. Yuck. And, as mentioned before, Carrey came off as simply annoying at times. It’s also annoying that the Network TV version has a lot of scenes that the DVD version does not have! WTF?! Thanks, Hollywood. Looks like only the downloaders get the real movie.

CONCLUSION: Despite Carrey providing an imperfect performance (and co-writing the screenplay), it was still laugh-out-loud funny in many points… Especially when he has to convince the psychiatrist that he is crazy (something Carrey is quite qualified to do in real life). It was cool how he was a better detective than the actual police, although [highlight for spoilers] it may be that the police were deliberately being bad detectives due to the Sean Young cover-up angle. It seems that a LOT of people have seen this movie, and that was our main reason for watching this despite having no interest. It’s certainly not un-funny; It’s definitely a straight-comedy, which automatically makes it better than pretty much all romantic comedies. Straight comedies are the pinnacle of what we watch, but most are funnier than this. We’ll still check out the sequel some day (in the name of completism), but this one didn’t quite meet my expectations. It might have exceeded Carolyn’s expectations, however, since she kind of didn’t want to watch this movie at all.

MOVIE QUOTE: “Good question, Aguado [who asked Ace to solve the homicide of the roach he just stepped on]. First, I’d establish a motive. In this case the killer saw the size of the bug’s DICK and became insanely jealous. Then I’d lose 30 pounds… PORKIN’ his wife.” [at which point Aguado lunges at him]

COINCIDENCES: This movie and Dr. Jekyll And Ms. Hyde both had Sean Young playing a woman [highlight for spoilers] that is really a man! And this movie and The Adventures Of Ford Fairlane both starred Tone Loc! WTF! Tone Loc!

FRIENDS’ RATINGS: Christian D loved it. Benj really liked it. Even Glen liked it (?!?!?). Tatiana liked it. Dad didn’t like it. Ian hated it. A broad spectrum compared to most movies. (more…)

NOODLE FIGHT!!!!!


Okay, I came here to post the noodle fight, but here’s some other misc detritus laying around my YouTube account, which is of late mostly a cesspool of videos of Beavis the cat (R.I.P.):
2007-2008 New Year’s Countdown:

Frustrated by spam:

Rocky Horror Picture Show montage:

Kick-ass top that spins for hours:

Chasing ducks:

And finally, some more noodle fight pics:
20080112 - Greg & Nicole's party - 149-4983 - Carolyn, Evan, Kipp - noodle fight

20080112 - Greg & Nicole's party - 149-4970 - Evan, Carolyn, Nicole, Joe, Heather - Noodle Fight!

20080112 - Greg & Nicole's party - 149-4969 - Carolyn, Nicole (bg) - Noodle Fight!

20080112 - Greg & Nicole's party - 149-4957 - Laszlo & Clint - Noodle Fight!

20080112 - Greg & Nicole's party - 149-4972 - Joe, Heather, Laszlo - Noodle Fight!

20080112 - Greg & Nicole's party - 149-4955 - Laszlo & Clint - Noodle Fight!

20080112 - Greg & Nicole's party - 149-4956 - Evan & Clint - Noodle Fight!

I had a very strange, long, extended dream involving camping at Elizabeth Furnace, and the Church Of The SubGenius‘s X-Day event. Apparently even Rev. Ivan Stang was too lazy to make it up to Sherman, NY, this year, so he just went to Elizabeth Furnace, where we normally camp, instead. But Elizabeth Furnace was all different — It had many more roads, and fenced off areas you weren’t supposed to go into, because they were Indian (Native American) territory. Somehow Carolyn convinced us to drive some weird way into Elizabeth Furnace, which basically wasted several hours. Our campsite was much farther away, and we were both drunk. Carolyn basically set camp up and passed out, and I was mad that we weren’t going to have the evening together. I started hanging out with Ivan Stang, since Carolyn was passed out. I hopped the fence into Indian territory and explored a bit — they had tomahawks and all kinds of cliche Native American stuff that would never actually be there laying around on the ground. I went over the fence and explored a bit, but alarms and such went off and we almost got kicked out. There was a big concert hall — something that really didn’t belong at a campground. Somehow me and Stang were hanging out, and he was completely trashed. Falling over trashed. Actually, I was stumbling a bit as well. Going to the restroom was an adventure. There were a bunch of normals around the concert hall, for some unrelated event. (And honestly, if this was happening in parallel to X-Day in Sherman, NY — why the hell would Stang be in redneckville Virginia? But dreams aren’t supposed to make sense.) Stang almost got in trouble and I had to help escort him out. I think eventually I stumbled back to the campsite and passed out next to Carolyn. The next day I was talking to Stang, and he kind of imitated something I said, but more like a sample than a human. He did it like 5 times. I was like, “Whoa, you can do the Hour Of Slack stuff in real life?” This dream was long AND odd. (more…)

 movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] Why not watch this? We never saw the original (or the 8 sequels), and kind of wanted to know the story without having to watch old movies from before 1980. That leaves this as a logical candidate. It actually got a 5.8 on IMDB, which is actually higher than the average rating of the last 5-10 movies we’ve watched. The rating was higher than Night Of The Living Dead 3-D, the last “big horror remake” we watched. And the movie was definitely better than NOTLD 3-D as well.

CONCLUSION: This wasn’t anything spectacular, and purist fans of the original no doubt agree. But it was nice to finally learn that aspect of American horror culture, and to be able to learn it in a modern movie.real-life real Amityville demon boy photographed by paranormal investigators I’m sorry, but 1970’s horror doesn’t cut it for me. Old horror staples like Frankestien or Dracula just aren’t scary to me; they’re ridiculous and make me laugh at a culture that would have ever found them “scary”. For horror movies to provide any real thrill for me, they must exist in a world that I can relate to. Which is, for me, a world I have lived in. The world of 1980 (when I was 6) to the Present. I have a feeling that if you held a gun to my head and made me watch the original — That I’d like this one better. No doubt tons of people disagree with me, but I don’t like old movies. Or old anything. I’m a modernist for most part.

RECOMMENDATION: If you don’t like old movies, and are a modern horror fan — see this so you can learn the Amityville story, which is no doubt a major influence in modern horror. It’s allegedly based on real-life events, and the actual people who were involved in real life supposedly worked with the filmmakers of this 2005 film. However, George Lutz (the real-life dad) denounced this version as “drivel”, and was suing the filmmakers at the time of his death in 2006. Perhaps the filmmakers ended up changing things that they should not have, but NOT KNOWING the original movie, I couldn’t care less. A story was told, we were entertained, and the ending was a “twist” compared to most modern horror movies — [highlight for spoilers] everybody lives! Weird!.

FRIENDS’ RATINGS: Ian didn’t like it. I’m hoping for a comment explaining why, and maybe some info on this movie as it compares to the original.

COINCIDENCES: (The Signal, Amityville Horror 2005) Two movies within a month or so that had a [highlight for spoilers] bearded patriarch of a couple/family go crazy and kill people, especially after seeing something on a TV screen that heightened his craziness.
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