December 2008


Who was the bright moron over at Evites who thinks that having planned maintenance on New Year’s Eve, one of the biggest party days of the year, when the highest number of people are depending on your services — makes sense on any planet in this universe? (more…)

So sometimes I think about sexonomics, and how in the sexual playing field, a female is a treasure, and a male is worthless. And it often goes back to testicles: Males are generating sperm that needs to be emptied, and thus it becomes a basic bodily need — at the base of Maslow’s triangle, along with food and shelter. Women? They don’t have any sperm to hold back.

But then I wonder if it’s deeper than that. A vagina is a hole, and a penis is the opposite. They’re meant to be together. But who needs who more? Does something that can have something stuck in it need something stuck in it more than something that can be stuck in something needs to be stuck somewhere? I’m leaning towards no.

Then I think about hardware, and male vs. female jacks. All stereo receivers, TVs, iPods, etc have tons of female jacks just waiting for something to be inserted in them. Yet have you ever seen something with every jack plugged (shut up Glen)? How often is the microphone jack in a computer plugged? Or the headphone jack in your home theatre station? Do you use every available input on all your devices?

Very unlikely. And that’s okay. The female jacks don’t need to be plugged in.

Yet if you have a pair of headphones with a male jack — There is an expectation that you’re going to use the headphones. They’re going to be plugged in. They need a jack to be plugged into.

And the cord that connects your guitar to it’s amp? Male on both ends. It needs to rock out with its cock[s] out.

So there you have it. Sexonomics in the hardware jack world is analagous to sexonomics in the real world. It had not yet occurred to me. (more…)

I made this awhile ago… just felt like randomly blogging it.

I love McDonald’s. Not because the food is superb, but because I DON’T CARE if my food is good. Eating is a chore. I would gladly sacrifice all the great tastes in the world — and never eat ice cream again — to free myself of the burden of having to eat every 2 or 3 hours. And the monetary savings alone would put thousands more in my pocket. Remember this axiom:

Cheap, Fast, Good – pick two.

In most things in life, you can only pick two. If I want food that’s cheap & fast, I’m going to McDonalds. If I want food that’s cheap & good, I’m going to Subway (where it’s not nearly as fast). If I want food that’s good and fast? Well, I’m not sure where I’d go for that — but it isn’t going to be cheap, that’s for sure. And if I want food that’s good and cheap? It’s not going to be fast; growing your own food yourself is the healthiest, cheapest food you’ll ever have. But it’s slow as fuck.

Anyway, now that I’m done with my anti-anti-McDonald’s spiel, here is my review:

McDonald’s recently moved double cheeseburgers off their $1 menu (the only thing I order off of — if the food is fast and not good, it damn well better be cheap). Now they are $1.20. And now the $1 menu has a “McDouble” instead. What the hell is a McDouble?

I don’t know, so in the name of science, I ordered a $1.20 double cheeseburger, and a $1.00 McDouble. I opened them up and examined them.

As far as I can tell, the only difference is an extra piece of cheese. And that could simply be an error on their part while cooking. I see no difference.

So people — Don’t pay $1.20 for a $1 burger. The tin-foil-hat-wearing conspiracy theorist in me says that McDonald’s is testing to see how stupid Americans are, and to see if they are dumb enough to pay $1.20 for something they’ve been paying $1.00 for, even when faced with a choice of either. Don’t fall for it.

I’m sticking to the dollar menu. Nothing at McDonald’s is worth more than $1, and this is proof.

Alternately, maybe McDoanld’s personnel are not paid enough to bother making the burgers correctly. Maybe they are SUPPOSED to be differnet, but nobody making minimum wage cares enough to bother?

UPDATE: Chris Y confirms that the difference is indeed 1 piece of cheese. Wow. (more…)

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