Saturday, February 7th, 2009

Fuck this shit! Fuck having to use TWO handkerchiefs (because the 1st is saturated). Oh, I could use paper towels, but I’d have gone through at least a roll today alone.

Fuck pouring 2-4 glasses of water at once because I can’t get enough water.

Fuck my stomach hurting from drinking more water than it can hold, yet being parched.

YARRR.. I’m going to actually go to the doctor this time. (more…)

Too bad that when you’re old enough to drive, you’re old enough to reproduce — because some people shouldn’t be in the gene pool:

I was at a McDonald’s recently, and saw something funny: A random FedEx guy talking to a random UPS or USPS guy (I forget which, it may have even been a UPS guy talking to a USPS guy).

They were at different tables. The funny thing is, they both delivered to our neighborhood. They had big conversations about all the dogs. They knew where all the neighbors with potentially harmful dogs were. I asked them about the pepper spray they give every mailman and he said it’s pretty useless and if you think it will actually stop a dog, you could end up dead.

USPS reports 6000 mailmen bitten EACH YEAR. But hey, I guess if that happens, it’s just the owner’s fault, right? And if someone breaks into your house and rapes your wife, it’s his parents fault for not raising him and socializing him right, right? Wrong.

Funny thing is, I don’t see any mention of mailmen injured by cats anywhere.

Anyway, fuck dogs. This image gave me a total childhood flashback:

…Except the dog that did this in my childhood was a huge, mean black lab named “BB”. I’d love to go back in time and kill that fucker. (more…)

Inquiring minds want to know. I want to know. (more…)