movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] The 1-sentence summary of this movie made it sound like a modern-day version of The Sure Thing. It was actually much better than The Sure Thing. I’d probably call this the best direct-to-video comedy I’ve watched in the past year.

LIMERICK REVIEW: There once was a movie called Sex Drive;
About a virgin; he was not yet sexually alive.
With an Amish Seth Green
a kind of funny I’d never seen.
We laughed so hard we may as well have been five.

HAIKU REVIEW: Teen sex comedies:
You’d think they’d grow old by now.
It’s not happening…

PEOPLE: Main characters: Josh Zuckerman, Amanda Crew (She’s The Man, Final Destination 3), and Clark Duke (who has had tiny parts in Superbad and Robot Chicken). Supporting characters: James Marsden playing a douchebag older brother (he was also Cyclops in the X-Men movies, and had parts in Superman Returns, Zoolander, Ally McBeal), Seth Green (who was absolutely hilarious as a sarcastic Amish car enthusiast). Minor characters: Alice Greczyn (aka Holly in Shrooms) as an Amish Girl and Katrina Bowden (aka Cerie from 30 Rock) as “Ms. Tasti”. Also keep an eye open for Brian Posehn and the band Fallout Boy.

QUIRKS: A madcap adventure. The Amish. Rumschpringe. Guys who treat women too nice to get laid. Guys who treat women so shitty they are all over them. Guys who fail to have a clue. Homophobic older brothers. Abusive jealous redneck boyfriends. Virginity. Road trips. Stolen cars. Internet romances and references. A fake YouTube video. Sure things. A masturbatory opening scene much like all the American Pie movies. Amish sarcasm the likes of which you’ve never seen. Good dialog — reminds me of Superbad without being unrealistically-cleverly-written like Juno, and without quite as much social awkwardness.

This is a straight-up comedy with romantic subplots — but definitely not a romantic comedy. There are really no dramatic moments other than the 60 seconds or so that tie up the romantic sub-plot.

20 extra minutes in the unrated version.

VISUALS: They seem to have added gratuitous naked hot girls at various parts of the movie. Like, walking down the mall or at the gas station. Completely unrealistic and not related to the plot at all. Just thrown in there for no reason other than to have naked girls.

MORALS: Staying a virgin too long is just too ridiculous. [Are you listening, LW?;)] But it can make for some quite comedic situations, and some very awkward leading “men”.

BAD STUFF: They did manage to disgust us bad enough in one scene that we had to look away from the screen for 30 seconds. But the fact that we actually had to do that — is damn funny. And impressive.

The movie’s romantic plot is incredibly predictable — so it’s a good thing this is not a romantic comedy. This film isn’t about being surprised; it’s about enjoying yourself and laughing your ass off at ridiculous situations.

CONCLUSION: I gave this 5/5 stars on Netflix, and 8/10 on IMDB. Carolyn agrees with this assessment. We watched this while drinking on a dead friday night and laughed our asses off. I’d definitely watch this again without waiting 7 years (my normal “rule” for reruns). We find this very comparable to Superbad. Possibly superior; definitely less serious, with a slightly less feelgood ending (but feelgood nonetheless).

RECOMMENDATION: If you like movies like the American Pie, Superbad, and the Harold & Kumar movies… Then I strongly recommend this movie. It might not be as clever and sentimental as Superbad; it might not have as many funny characters as American Pie; it might not have as much drug humor as Harold & Kumar — but it is as solid of a comedy caper as any.

MOVIE QUOTE: Randy (a clueless kid who hangs out with Andy while they both unsuccessfully hit on every girl they sees): Wait, I thought you took her to prom?
Ian (the main character): Yeah, but it was a just friends kinda thing.
Randy: You should bang her. We would.
Andy: Dude, we would bang her so hard!
Randy: Tell her we’ll bang her for you if you’re not into it!
Andy: Yeah, hard!
Randy: With our dicks!
Andy: Our dicks are huge!
Randy: You can see them from space!

I wish IMDB listed some of the better quotes… It’s funnier than that quote makes it sound.

FRIENDS’ RATINGS: I heard some of John The Canadien‘s friends watched this and really liked it.

Mood: digesting delicious Carolyn cooking
Music: Kreator – Carrion