movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] I got this because it was easy to see in 720p! Hadn’t heard of it before getting it. Had no clue that this is a remake of a Spanish film called “Rec”.

HAIKU REVIEWS:
#1: Most people should know:
Government authorities
cannot be trusted.

#2: Such lasting tension,
shaky claustrophobia.
They’re coming for you!

PEOPLE: Nobody, really. Tho if you like Heroes, you’ll see a bit part by the Hispanic girl whose eyes turn black and kill everyone near her. She is particular recognizable when her eyes start to turn black!

QUIRKS: Cloverfield + Blindness + 28 Days Later + Right At Your Door + a lil’ bit of Blair Witch = Quarantine.

You get the constant shaky camera of Cloverfield, as this is a single-camera-based movie, just like Cloverfield. Derivative? Maybe. But having the movie as being almost one uninterrupted cut really adds to the tension. I just watched Crank (the movie), and the non-stop pace of the later 60% or so of the movie really reminded me of that.

You get the “government-enforced quarantine” quirk of Right At Your Door.
You get the “mad people trapped in a building” quirk of Blindness. Especially when the power goes out.
You get the “angry running infected people” quirk of 28 Days Later. They’re not quite as bad as the I Am Legend “zombies”…
And near the end, when they get terrified, and screaming — it starts to feel a lot more like Blair Witch. But with zombies, and a quarantine.

And there’s NO SCORE for this film. The only effects are reality itself. This was actually a smart move. I didn’t even notice a score was missing, but it definitely affected me (without me noticing).

VISUALS: There’s not much of a need for lots of visuals in this movie. Scary zombies in the dark probably don’t require as much effort as scary zombies in the light. This movie is more about cerebral tension than gore, in my mind. But still, the “shaky cam” style — love it or hate it (more on that below) — leads to a somewhat stylized feel.

MORALS: Don’t trust the government to look out for your own best interests, if the government has decided your more of a threat alive than dead.

POLITICS: Don’t expect the government to tell the truth when it purposefully causes people to die for the greater good. (Hmmm…Flight 93 anyone?)

BAD STUFF: The first 15 minutes of the film are PAINFULLY slow and dull. But once Quarantine gets to, well… the quarantine… Things pick up. And then they reach a point where they NEVER stop.

GOOD STUFF: Any horror movie that makes me feel physically sieged due to the non-stop adrenaline, tensed muscles, and contracting bladder … Making me hurt to the point where I wish it would stop … Has succeeded in it’s mission of horrifying me. Bravo, Quarantine! You kept me on edge for a long, long time.

The irony is — some people use these very excuses for why the *HATED* the movie. Uh, HELLO??!?! It’s a *HORROR* movie. It’s *SUPPOSED* to gross you out, freak you out, make you sweat, shiver, and tremble!

BAD REVIEW BLURBS: Some blurbs from reviews I saw and disagreed with:

“Walked out of the theater. The constant hysterical screaming and crying during half of the movie was too much.” DISAGREE! The constant hysterical screaming and crying is a lot closer to how real human beings would act in such an insane situation. Carolyn even remarked, “This is how *I* would be acting.” And I myself was a bit disturbed because I had come to that same conclusion myself, and imagining Carolyn that freaked out just added to my own tension and fear.

“The redundant camera shake seems to be a terrible growing trend … I couldn’t make sense of what was going on in the screen at all. They could’ve been…sipping tea, for all I know.” DISAGREE! That person completely missed the point! In a real situation like that (assuming this could be real), you’re not going to see 100% of what’s happening. Getting fleeting glimpses is actually more realistic.
Back in the old days of horror, a lot of the worst stuff happened off camera, and was left COMPLETELY to the imagination of the viewer. I found that lame. When modern horror came into place, many old horror fans hated on the overt gore as “an easy way out”, “just an excuse to show more gore”, “lacking imagination as you need none, it’s all laid out in front of you”, and such. I somewhat disagree, as I am a seeker of truth and intensity, and imagination never equals the reality of seeing it “really” happen before you. But there’s still something to be said for employing some imagination.

Now that horror is getting “post-modern”, with cameras in the actual film, we have people hating on a movie for NOT showing all the gore. You just can’t win with everybody. I think it’s better to show more (modern) than less (old), but certainly not showing 100% shouldn’t be lauded as such a great fault!

“Between the constant camera shake and the over-the-top gore, I left the theater feeling nauseated and more than a little annoyed.” YOU’RE STUPID! If you didn’t want gore, why the hell are you going to a zombie horror movie?! What were you expecting, Meet The Fockers? And people who get nauseated from shaky cams (or from playing first person shooters) are simply physically inferior to those of us who don’t. Just as I am physically inferior to those who can ride roller coasters without feeling nauseated. This doesn’t mean rollercoasters suck, it just means they aren’t for me.

If you don’t like shaky cam, blame your own physical constitution, not the film. And pay more attention to which films use shaky cam, and don’t go to them.

CONCLUSION: I gave this 5/5 stars on Netflix. I tend to rate horrors on their own scale, and this is a top tier horror. For IMDB I gave this 8/10, as it had me completely riveted to the point of feeling physical stress from the constant adrenaline. Which is kind of the POINT of a horror movie.

RECOMMENDATION: Like horrors? Zombie horrors? Shaky cams? Incredible tension? Not seeing everything you’re running from? Did you like Cloverfield? Then see this! I might have actually liked this better than Cloverfield. Cloverfield was more epic, more original, and more groundbreaking. By those virtues, it’s a better film. But this film might have actually scared me more, which is why *I* watch horror movies. This film is far more claustrophobic than Cloverfield; The zombies far harder to avoid than in 28 Days Later (but not I Am Legend–those zombies were persistent); the characters and ending less annoying than Blair Witch; and the government far more sinister than Right At Your Door.

SIMILAR MOVIES: As mentioned already, Cloverfield, 28 Days Later, Right At Your Door, and Blair Witch Project are the 4 movies most similar to this. And of course, it’s a remake of Rec, so it’s similar to that. But from what I hear, Rec uses demonic possession instead of mutated rabies. Not caring for spirits or spirituality, I think I prefer the more plausible Americanized idea. I also hear that the light is lower, and the claustrophobia higher in the American version.

Mood: digesting
Music: Samhain – Trouble