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A site devoted to user-generated comics. I don't think I'm gonna use it, but I did play around with their Avatar creator for awhile. It still doesn't quite look like me. I'm open to suggestions as to how to make this look like me (Besides changing the white shoes, which I never wear).
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Good luck winning that war against the 100 Al Queda left in Afghanistan. Our next Vietnam is not going to be won. When Obama goes out of office, and Afghanistan still isn't at peace. this will be yet another failure for both Obama and Bush. We're losing more American troops in these wars than we lost in 911 — three wrongs make a right?
April 2010
Monthly Archive
April 30, 2010
April 29, 2010
links for 2010-04-29 [one of 2 posts, thank you for screwing up today, delicious]
Posted by Claire CJS under JournalLeave a Comment
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Good thing we’re a tobacco state, or this would rule differently. Public smoking laws have little to do with health, and more to do with people’s emotional desire to control behavior of others they find offensive. They just banned wearing deodorant in a Michigan city, because people have now learned that they have the “right” to control other people’s actions [smells] they find offensive.
Don’t like something? Avoid it. Don’t like violence on movies? Don’t watch them. Don’t like smoke? Go someplace where there isn’t — there’s plenty of places. Of course, the people who don’t like smoke aren’t playing fair. They want to make it so that those who WANT smoke in public DON’T have a choice. “My way or the highway.” Typical fascist bullshit.
For once, I say: Go Republicans! And for once, I say: Boo American Cancer Society. What a turnabout…
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First off, I am absolutely against illegal immigration. With all the money we spend on the war on terror, the real threat to security is someone coming across our unenforced border and attacking us that way. Iraq or Afghanistan are not threats to us; Mexico and Canada are.
And it’s nothing to do with race: I’d vote to send every illegal back RIGHT THIS SECOND, if that was an option. MY grandparents came here legally. You want to live here? You do the same.
HOWEVER, the way it is written, this law is a total bullshit police state unconstitutional racial-profile-inducing piece of shit law that is going to result in justified lawsuits costing taxpayers tons of money.
This law will be struck down. Look forward to YouTube videos of brown americans getting their rights trodden on by police. There is no legal requirement to carry ID when you’re not driving, so people are going to be detained. Immigration detentions do not give you a right to a lawyer, you know…
Interesting comments.
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Martha Traxler’s email address is martha.traxler@copiah.ms. She also shows up in a poorly-copy-edited article about the issue from October of last year: http://www.wlox.com/Global/story.asp?S=1… wherein she claimed that “the issue goes beyond just clothing.”Email her. Tell her she’s a discriminatory cunt. I did. Fuck this shit, and fuck the south for perpetuating conservative ideals of racism and discrimination. Of course this shit still happens in the north, but you just don’t hear about it as often, do you?
- Delicious fucked up today. Made 2 posts, neither identical. Great. Manually fixed it finally.
April 29, 2010
links for 2010-04-29 [one of 2 posts, thank you delicious for screwing up today]
Posted by Claire CJS under JournalLeave a Comment
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Bart wrote “South Park – We’d stand beside you if we weren’t so scared” on the chalkboard in one of the latest Simpsons episodes. After having South Park talk about Simpsons AND Family Guy, it’s nice to see a FOX cartoon giving a shoutout back to Comedy Central! Go cartoons! Fuck all religion!
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GOOD! Sony, Apple, and other companies are leading the charge in a new kind of legal wrangling: “We tell you what you can do with your property after you buy it.” It’s a techno-legal wrangle to get past the first sale doctrine and other legal protections. It is not deserved. This firmware update takes away functionality that people paid for. I still will not buy a PS3 [or XBOX360] due to the amount of freedom you are supposed to voluntarily give away for the privilege of paying them to own their product. Let’s see Sony fry on this one.
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… Foot, insert into mouth.
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Remember when Obama promised Guantanamo closed in a year…. a year and a half ago?
Interrogated 142 times starting at age 15, I’d admit to throwing a grenade too. If he actually did it, his own testimony is invalid due to torture. Way to go, guys.
International law treats child soldiers as victims.
I don’t really care if this guy IS guilty: He wouldn’t have killed that American soldiers if we hadn’t invaded the wrong country in the first place: 99% of Afghanistan has nothing to do with 911. It was mostly Saudis who caused 911. The Taliban just let Al Queda set up camp there. But Al-Queda is gone from Afghanistan now — less than 100 there according to the Obama Administration. So why are we sending more troops again?
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Yay! 100 eps is a good milestone! If only every great AdultSwim show would last this long!
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More goodness!
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<3 Cracked!
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As much as I don’t like the sound of Arizona’s new immigration law — this is the county I grew up in, and a similar but not identical law gave measurable results in drastically decreasing crime and saving money.
Interesting to me was that they saved at least $6M in ESL teaching. Want to come to our country? English is a requirement. But you gotta learn it on YOUR dollar, not ours.
This link was used against me in an argument, but it’s a good link.
- Delicious fucked up today. Made 2 posts, neither identical. Great. Manually fixed it finally.
April 29, 2010
VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006)
Posted by Claire CJS under Carolyn, Clio, Media, Movies, People, Reviews, Video[4] Comments
PEOPLE: Directed by Adam McKay and starring Will Farrel — who both worked on Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy and Wake Up Ron Burgundy: The Lost Movie. With John C. Reilly (aka Dr. Steve Brule from Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job); Jane Lynch, who we just saw in the Area 57 pilot; David Koechner, who professed his love to Ron Burgundy in the Anchorman deleted movie; Michael Clarke Duncan, who we just saw as Kingpin in the excellent DareDevil movie (he was also Balactus in Minoriteam, and in Sin City, The Scorpion King, Armageddon); the lovely Leslie Bibb (Sex & Death 101, Iron Man, Wristcutters: A Love Story); Molly Shannon (SNL) as a drunk wife; the very lovely (but repressed in this movie) Amy Adams (who was in a few episodes of The Office, described as “Pam 6.0” by Michael Shott); Sacha Baron Cohen (aka Borat) as the “bad guy”; Andy Richter as the bad guy’s gay lover. A pretty good cast for a comedy movie.
QUIRKS: This is, unfortunately, a sports-themed movie — NASCAR. That counts against it. But it’s also a movie full of non-stop laughs — and the comedy doesn’t ever stop. Even the child stars are hilarious. And Borat makes an excellent annoying French villian.
CONCLUSION: This was quite funny. I’d give it 4/5 stars on Netflix, though it might only deserve 3 due to us not caring about sports. And I’d give it 7.5/10 on IMDB. It’s definitely a grade-A comedy, but at the same time, it’s not a masterpiece. Anchorman was funnier.
RECOMMENDATION: If you like Will Farrel or John C. Reilly, you should probably check this out.
SIMILAR MOVIES: This movie very much has the same feel as Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy. You put the same people together, and it’s no surprise that they make a similar movie. It also reminds me of Walk Hard:The Dewey Cox Story (especially with John C. Reilly starring!).
MOVIE QUOTE: Ricky Bobby: [television commercial] Hi, I’m Ricky Bobby. If you don’t chew Big Red, then FUCK YOU!
FRIENDS’ RATINGS: Scott loved it. Tatiana, Wayne, Eric M, Christian D really liked it. Metinee, Benj, Ian, and Rebekah liked it. Everyone seemed to at least like this. (more…)
April 28, 2010
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Nevermind that there is no legal requirement to show your ID, unless you are driving. Pepperspraying someone in the face for trying to call their mother is over the top. And the city agrees: Ms. Screven just won a $65,000 settlement.
But do you really think that will stop the police, when Elix Hernandez won't have to pay the money himself?
Or the taxpayers, when settlements come out of insurance funds?Isn't it interesting how new forms of police douchebaggery always seem to happen to someone who is black or latino? Especially interesting since the cop who did this is named Hernandez….
Major asshole comments on the article, too. "The woman obviously was deliberately breaking the rules for a payday! How dare she not show ID! Pepper spray is less force then putting an arm on her — it has no chemicals!" Wow. No wonder this shit happens. We're fucking retards.
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THREE separate rulings — going back to 1983 — found the law unconstitutional.
But what do the police care about actual laws? They consider themselves legislator, judge, jury, and executioner.
It took 27 years, but now New York City will be found in contempt of court every time they do this. A $500 fine each time, increasing by $500 every 3 months, up to $5000. So in 27 months, New York will have to pay $5000 if they try this unconstitutional bullshit again.
But what about the rest of the country? Funny how when a law restricts freedom, it is applied everywhere. But when an exemption is granted via lawsuit, it applies only to the locale where the lawsuit was won.
This is also proof that strong fines are the only way to control the police. This is exactly why suing the police is the right thing to do — it's the only way to control them.
Then again, if the cops themselves don't pay the fine, won't this just come out of the city's insurance fund? Pfffft.
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An AOL article about X-Day and The Church Of The SubGenius! Good luck getting this kind of coverage, Pastafarians! You got nothin' on "Bob".
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Even after unanimous Republican support for this new law, Republicans still don't follow their own law, and are sending out documents saying "census document" on non-census bag-for-money Republican materials. Is this how desperate the party is?
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Wow. Way to trample multiple constitutional rights at once! Ban him from talking about his religious beliefs to his own child!
The ban against polygamy is about as dumb as the ban against gay marriage. Here's an idea: Let consenting adults have their own beliefs, and live their own lives.
Freedom of choice — unless someone disagrees with your choice. Then it's okay to trample it if your choice is unpopular – like smoking on your own property.
Judge Donald J. Eyre seems to have forgotten that his primary job is not to dictate how children are raised. He has a stick up his ass.
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Apple people might have missed these :D
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pwned! So glad I don't have Comcast!
April 27, 2010
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Catholicism: Becoming a stupider club to be in with every passing day.
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"I don't care. I am going to take you out and throw you on the ground.", is what the disabled man said the officers said to him.
"Officers also told their supervisors that they offered to help the family get another ride, authorities said. The family said that did not happen."
Yeah — they're liars too. They also didn't have their microphones on, which is law there. Or maybe they just "lost" the recordings, taking a page from the Seattle police's playbook?
Funny how these stories are almost never about white people. And seem to come out of Texas… a LOT.
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The screenplay for the unreleased Sex Pistols / Russ Meyer movie is finally released.
April 26, 2010
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Yup. Banning consenting activities between adults on private property reduces choice for those may attend such places.
The people who claim their choice is taken away by going to places where people smoke have successfully taken the choice away from those who want to. You could have simply NOT GONE TO PLACES YOU DON'T LIKE, but instead, you've made it so people who do like it can't go either.
Two wrongs make a right? Tyranny of the majority wins? Less freedom in the name of more freedom? You gotta love the rationalizations prohibitionists use.
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"In short, GM is using government money to pay back government money to get more government money. And at a 2% lower interest rate at that. This is a nifty scheme to refinance GM's government debt–not pay it back!"
Hey — can I do that with my house somehow?
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100M DSL coming soon? Good. We need as much competition as possible. American internet — like our medicine — is a rip-off compared to most of the civilized world. We spend more and get less.
April 26, 2010
VIDEO: CARTOONS: ANIME: REVIEW: Planetes aka “Wanderers” (2003)
Posted by Claire CJS under Anime, Carolyn, Cartoons, Clio, Media, People, Reviews, Ryan S, Video[2] Comments
[IMDB link] [Netflix link] [Ryan S’s excellent review] Time to watch an anime series again. It’s been awhile.
PLOT SUMMARY: Space garbage is a problem in the future, requiring full-time garbage collection of debris in Earth orbit. Meanwhile, selfish capitalist corporations are trying a land-grab at claiming all the space resources as the property of whoever invests (rich get richer), while terrorist groups pit innumerable lives against their desire to have space resources divided up for the benefit of all humanity. But that’s just the back story: This series, like most anime, is quite character driven, and about the relationships between the various characters. But again, I direct the reader to Ryan S’s excellent review of this series, as I am too lazy to write full reviews, because I try to review EVERYTHING I watch. It’s too much :)
UNCOMFORTABLE PLOT SUMMARY (inspired by this): [highlight for spoilers]→ Corporations selfishly grab space resources; terrorists do good things.
QUIRKS: Based on a comic. Space. Politics. Terrorism. Capitalism. Smoking. Personal relationships. Love. Loss. It’s a 26 episode series, so there are many different kinds of episodes… Depressing ones, funny ones, dramatic ones, etc.
This is often heralded as the most realistic space-based anime ever made. They consulted with the Japanese equivalent of NASA to make sure things were accurate. Also, for example, space is dead silent. If they show a ship exploding — there will be no sound. Finally, paste-eating nerds won’t have to complain in a Comic Book Guy voice: “You can’t really hear explosions in space.”
VISUALS: Nothing special, but anime visuals are almost always superior to their American-animated counterparts.
POLITICS: Tons of politics in this movie. They don’t take the central stage; Most anime is about a guy and a girl falling in love, with the characters in the foreground, and the plot in the background. But politics permeate many of the episodes, as well as the series’s climax. This improves the show by making it more thought-provoking than a non-political show would be. Also, they amazingly don’t take sides. One could argue that the terrorists in this series are the good guys, making sure that space exploration benefits ALL of humanity, not just the rich capitalists. You could also argue that the terrorists are the bad guys, threatening to set space travel back decades by killing innumerable people. This moral ambiguity makes the series that much more enjoyable.
BAD STUFF: The one issue I had with smoking was the smoking booth: If they’d really done their research, they would probably have been able to more accurately depict smoking in the future by having Fee use an e-cigarette to vaporize nicotine, instead of smoking cigarettes with fire. Since no combustion occurs with vaporization, no precious oxygen is wasted. Though I’m not sure what the byproduct of that is like, and what its effects on space instrumentation would be, I would assume for purposes of space vehicle safety, that vapor > smoke.
CONCLUSION: An excellent anime series that doesn’t fall into the boring tropes that most anime series fall into.
RATINGS:
Clint: Netflix: 4/5 stars. IMDB: 8/10.
Carolyn: Netflix: 4/5 stars. IMDB: 8/10.
The native public rating for this movie is: IMDB: 8.8/10, Netflix: 3.8/5 stars (Netflix‘s predicted rating for us was 3.6/5 stars. It’s true, we don’t like anime as much as “true” anime fans do).
RECOMMENDATION: Even if you hate anime, this is a very “non-anime” anime series worth checking out. Again, read Ryan S’s excellent review of this series. It says more than I will ever bother to.
COINCIDENCES: (The Time Traveler’s Wife, Planetes #24) 2 videos in 2 days where someone had to *temporarily* be in a wheelchair due to hypothermia. Space or time travel’ll do that to ya.
FRIENDS’ RATINGS: I’m going to assume, based on Ryan S’s excellent review, that he loved it. Ben W also chimed in on Facebook, with good things to say about it.
(more…)
April 24, 2010
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Aw shucks. I was hoping for a more Californian approach to this.
Such a shame that it took them TWELVE FUCKING YEARS to go from a majority vote — to something actually happening. And that's why I will never vote for Bob Barr, even when he became libertarian and ran for president.
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Too big to fail? Bullshit. Smaller banks help the people more than larger banks. If these banks had failed, it wouldn't have been a "sky is falling" scenario. More banks would have popped up in their place, and these smaller banks would actually be more efficient, and more likely to loan money out [you know — help us].
Sometimes, free market idealism is true. Sometimes it isn't. The government is pretty good at ruling on the wrong side of issues, and the bailout was yet another example.
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And the plot sickens, as usual. Government anthrax blamed on a lowly government worker — but how did he do it? This case is far from solved or closed.
What makes this look even more suspicious than before? It was the government that did not let this guy speak … until now.
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Maybe it's time for you to switch away from Geico?
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Oops! You guys weren't supposed to say that! It fell down due to fire, remember? Unprecedented, magical fire!
April 23, 2010
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Taxpayers paid for cops.
Taxpayers paid for cameras.
Taxpayers paid for cops to prosecute man for refusing to show ID, even though that is not legal.So when the cops conveniently "lost" the video, why did it take a civilian amateur hacker in order to cover up their obstruction of justice and falsification of documents?
Because they didn't lose it. They deliberately deleted it to cover their asses!
This is why cameras don't magically solve everything. There are no simple solutions. You have to clearly think everything out, and you have to have experts that can determine this.
No citizen should have to know computer forensics just to protect their own rights! And no police should be able to lie to someone in a way that violates their rights, and get away with it.
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Okay AMC, you're getting a bit insane. A blog for a character is one thing — but a website?
April 23, 2010
VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Big Trouble In Little China (1986)
Posted by Claire CJS under Carolyn, Clio, Media, Movies, People, Reviews, Video[4] Comments
[IMDB link] [Netflix link] Parthena convinced us to watch this. I’d never seen it, and I think Carolyn hadn’t seen it since she was a kid.
PEOPLE: Directed by John Carpenter (after Prince Of Darkness, but before Starman). Starring Kurt Russel, Kim Cattrall, Dennis Dun, James Hong (who’s been in a lot of stuff that we’ve watched lately), Victor Wong, Suzee Pai.
QUIRKS: Totally craziness. I mean… this movie is a prime example of the 1980s over-the-top movie style that was quite popular back then!
VISUALS: Yes… there’s lots of neat visual stuff in this movie. Being a 1986 movie, the special effects obviously aren’t up to date. But being a fantasy movie set in a modern world, it really doesn’t matter. A lot of the stuff that happens can only be described as “out of this world”.
MORALS: Kurt Russell doesn’t have them. He just wants his $1,148.
CONCLUSION: Netflix: 4/5 stars. IMDB: 8/10. This is a really good crazy caper! There’s a lot of “WTF!!!” moments here… from Kurt Russell’s opening CB-radio rants where he seems to be channeling Denis Leary, to the fact that sorcery is real, dudes float out of the sky, and crazy mass murders can happen in Chinatown without the police ever caring. This was definitely a fun adventure.
Too bad they didn’t go through with the scene after the ending that they originally wanted. It sounds fun! :) Also, Scary Movie 2 parodies this at some point, but I probably didn’t notice at the time! D’oh! Robot Chicken S1E11 also has a sketch with characters from this movie.
RECOMMENDATION: If you like 80’s capers — this is definitely one to see. Most people seem to have seen this movie, and highly recommend it!
MOVIE QUOTE: Jack Burton: When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, and he looks you crooked in the eye and he asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol’ Jack Burton always says at a time like that: “Have ya paid your dues, Jack?” “Yessir, the check is in the mail.”
FRIENDS’ RATINGS: Parthena, Christian, Chris Z loved it. Ian & Benj really liked it. Carolyn liked it, but that was an old rating; I wonder if it’s changed now. (more…)
April 22, 2010
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Yup — Pope John Paul II also helped cover-up child-raping priests. Apparently, raping children is God's will. And people are still members of this organization? Not every Nazi wanted to kill all the Jews, y'know. But I still think it unconscionable to remain a member of a group that does bad things.
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Despite the fact that I think countries should not interfere with freedom of religion… I can't help but be happy at this, as Scientology is not a real religion, but made-up sci-fi bullshit. At least the Church Of The SubGenius offers you eternal salvation for $30 or triple your money back, without manipulating peoples' lives or bilking them out of their hard-earned cash. But Scientology isolates families, assaults protesters, and tries to actually ruin peoples' lives. Fuck them.
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The Catholic church moves on from blaming priest rape on Satan, to Jews, to gays, and now .. to the internet (and TV). It's all the internet's fault! Before the internet, nobody ever got raped! Open mouth, insert foot – still further.
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I was not aware of this 2 minute comedic video from DerrickComedy/CollegeHumor — but it certainly does seem to be the new receptionist Erin from The Office. You know — the one who just hooked up with Andy the Nard Dog? Heh heh.
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Anyone have any experience with this site?
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Told ya so.
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Finally, Coke the way it was meant to be, before the prohibitionists forced consenting adults to change the ingredients of their favorite soda from coca to caffeine. Of course, you'll have to go to Bolivia if you want the freedom of choosing your own soft drink.
April 21, 2010
QUESTIONS: Which of thease places is cheapest to travel to?
Posted by Claire CJS under Audio, Carolyn, Clio, Concerts, Music, PeopleLeave a Comment
20100503 – Netherlands – Amsterdam, Paradiso
20100505 – CH-Geneva, PTR-Usine
20100507 – France – Limoges, CC………M John Lennon
20100508 – France – Rennes, Antipode
20100509 – France – Tourcoing, Le Grand Mix
20100512 – GB-London, Electric Ballroom
20100514 – Italy – Parma, Circolo Onirica
20100515 – Italy – Roma, Init
20100521 – Hauzenberg bei Passau, 29. Pfingst Open Air NEW!!!
20100716 – B-Dour, Dour Festival
20100717 – FR-Montmartin Sur Mer, Chauffer Dans La Noirceur
20100910 – Berlin, Berlin Festival
Oh who am I kidding? If I go somewhere, it’s going to be Amsterdam.
BTW, these are Atari Teenage Riot reunion tour dates. They’re probably not doing it again, and this is the only time in 10 yrs that they’ve played. (more…)
April 21, 2010
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Really? A felony for masturbating behind closed doors, where no one can see you? Just because it's a school? That's totally fucking ridiculous. When will the Christian Puritan values finally be eradicated from our nation? Do I have to sacrifice a goat to Satan or something?
No students were involved or around. If nobody saw it, how is it indecent exposure?
And what is the janitor doing smelling used cum-rags in the trash anyway? Wow.
As if people don't masturbate at work ever. HA!
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Fake meat is unnatural. If you want to be a vegetarian, eat real vegetables. Pretend veggie burgers are bullshit, and apparently quite possibly more harmful to you than meat. Denying the cycle of life can be harmful to your health. Either be a real vegetarian, or accept that you want real meat. Don't eat this fake shit.
April 20, 2010
JOURNAL: COMPLAINTS: HARDWARE: Stuff is breaking a lot lately, and it’s really annoying.
Posted by Claire CJS under Carolyn, Clio, Complaints, Hardware, House, Journal, People, Technology1 Comment
things that have died in the past 4 months:
- my car [deer = fender, headlight, blinker, +$3000, -$200]
- my car [tie rod, -$700]
- my car [tire, -$100]
- my RAM [they’re not honoring the warranty replacement because they claim it came from a 4G set, even though I never got 4G at once ever, -$80]
- my 1.5TB harddrive [only 6 months old, Western Digital Green drives suck]
- carolyn’s car [headlights, -$10 so far, much more to come]
- carolyn’s mp3 player [-$47]
- carolyn’s motherboard [-$70]
- carolyn’s power supply [-$45]
- carolyn’s 120G harddrive
- our house’s dryer [$-82 so far]
- our smallest TV, which I had since 1990ish
April 20, 2010
JOURNAL: OLD SCHOOL COMPUTING: I had a 1-person buddy list before the concept existed in software that I knew of
Posted by Claire CJS under Clio, Computer, Journal, old school (non-BBS), People, Software, Technology[3] Comments
OPENING BRAG
I was always one who did things first on their computer.
I was the first human being I knew to get online via BBSes (using a dumb terminal, not a computer), AND on the internet (via illegal hacking; special thanks to local wardialers).
I was the first human being I knew to have his computer talk, or store music digitally (VOC file of 16 second Descendents song in ~1990, baby! MP3 wasn’t invented yet!);
I was the first human being I knew to use a social networking site (SixDegrees–not ONE person answered my friend requests. People didn’t understand the potential of the concept, and now almost every one of them is on Facebook);
I’also m pretty sure I was the first human being I knew to use Google (at least, I remember emailing my whole addressbook to tell them about this new search engine that beat the pants off of Altavista and Lycos. But perhaps I heard about it from one of my colleagues).
I was also the first human being I know to have any semblance of a buddy list — because Windows chat programs hasn’t been invented yet. Not to my knowledge. I did it by cobbling together the unix finger command via a cron job with it’s output filtered by grep.
HOW? Step 1: Know the unix ‘talk’ command
Unixphiles probably remember the Unix talk command. Before Facebook chat, before Yahoo Chat, before AOL chat, before ICQ, even before BBS sysop chat — there was the unix talk command:
^ Kinda like that. But without the Windows around it, as you were probably on a dumb terminal connected to a unix server
It allowed you to talk to an email address — since back then, the majority of email addresses were tied to a unix shell account.
Besides IRC and BBSes, this was really the only way to talk to someone else online. And I’ve always been interested in the extra reach online provides; I’m an eccentric person and it’s always been hard to find people like me.
In fact, I met Carolyn on a BBS in 1991 — and it just so happened that she went to my high school. Thus, when we first met over 18 years ago, her first words to me were, “Are you Satan?”, and my first words to her were, “Are you Magic Mist?”
HOW? Step 2: Know the unix ‘finger’ command
Perverted jokes aside, the unix finger command let you ‘finger’ an account, to see some basic information about it. A very basic finger would, at a minimum, give you a set of information like this:
(I've redacted my IP address from these screenshots.)
And if you edited a local file called “.plan”, you could insert extra information here. Of course I did this, so my finger output was actually longer (insert Futurama finglonger joke here):
(Click any of these images to see them in full size.)
Notice the line that says “On since Wed Dec 23”? That is crucial for step 3.
HOW? Step 3: Know the unix ‘grep‘ command
Grep is one of the single most useful unix commands in existence. I use it EVERY day. It basically returns lines that match what you’re looking for.
I use it to search my phone numbers, as well as to search my filelists so I know where files are. It employs regular expressions, which are a powerful way of matching text. (Ask Vicky about her regular expression skirt…)
Basically, if you grep for something that isn’t there, it will return nothing, like so:
Yes: The finger output above did not contain the word "snuffleupagus", so there was no output.
But if you grep for something that IS there, like “On since”, it will return the line that matches that:
"On since" appears in my unix finger output, so that line is displayed.
So now we have a command that:
- Displays a line of text if an account is online (because finger returns a line saying “on since”)
– or – - Displays nothing if an account is offline (because finger does not return a line saying “on since”)
It looks like we have a way of spitting a line out to the screen if someone is online. But how do we automate this?
HOW? Step 4: Know unix cron jobs
Cron jobs are simply unix’s way of scheduling tasks. I wont go into the details, as they are quite fugly.
But basically, you can run programs at any interval you want. I used to use it to send emails to myself every hour during business hours reminding me to do my anti-carpal tunnel hand exercises. It’s well known enough that there are shirts of it available at Zazzle.com:
free advertising
So, I simply set up a cron job to finger specific email addresses and grep them for “on since” every minute. If the person was online, the text would simply appear on your screen — wherever your cursor was:
Sample line of output.
This could mess up what you were doing — displaying a line of text over your email inbox, or over a file you were editing; so you would just hit Control-L (the refresh key) to erase the text and fix the screen. It was an ugly kludge, but it worked. And obviously you might want to grep the line containing their username out as well, so you know who is online.
In my case, I was only monitoring ONE person, so I didn’t need to know who it was.
She eventually sent me photographs of her boobs in the postal mail, so I’d say this system was a success.
They say all significant hardware advances are due to war, while all significant software advances are due to porn.
I eventually found her on Facebook, but I’m honestly not sure if she remembers me. And before anyone asks, she was, and is, quite attractive. In fact, between this girl’s photographs, and 18 years and counting with Carolyn, I’d say most of the sex I’ve gotten in my life has been a direct result of my technical prowess. Rowwwr…. Am I sexy yet?
WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ALL THAT?
No point. (Made you read! Haha!)
I just thought it would be neat to document something unique that I did in the early 1990s. I’m sure other people had this idea and implemented it too — but *I* didn’t know these people. Back then, people weren’t generally connected online — the world wide web didn’t exist yet. People had to come up with innovations on their own. So if anyone else ever did this as well — or something similar — I’d love to hear about it.
Old school computing had so much charm compared to nowadays. Nowadays, everything has been done. I just spend time talking about politics, blogging, and uploading photos. Back then? It was big a challenge just to get your words to reach ONE person, let alone millions of readers.
THE END. (more…)
April 20, 2010
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And why should he stop? 31 times he's gotten in trouble, 31 times he remains a cop. Please tell me what other careers allow you to be disciplined 31 times and keep your job? I smell the thin blue line at work here.
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Dickheads should be fired. One slapped the 10-year-old and didn't put it in his police report. Both officers have been disciplined in the past for other incidents.
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Islam threatens South Park! This is about as ridiculous as Catholocisms latest moves.
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Yup. You can't wear deodorant if you're a city employer anymore. You really thought they'd stop at smoking bans? People want the world to make them comfortable when they go out in it. They complain about being robbed of choice, when nobody is holding a gun to their head and making them go where they are uncomfortable. Of course this wasn't going to stop at smoking bans!
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Porn star makes movie at age 19. Venezuelan buys movie. Passes through U.S. Spends months in prison. They actually had to fly her to the country and have her present documents to prove he was innocent.
So wrong, so wrong. This is NOT how our justice system — or any sane justice system — is supposed to work. You don't prove your innocence – the state has to prove your guilt!
But when children are involved, fucking idiots everywhere throw all logic out the gate, and operate on purely emotional parameters. One of the reasons I can't fucking stand children. I wish we were all born at "age" 20, adults from the getgo, like in Arthur C. Clarke's The City And The Stars.
And what if Lupe was dead, or didn't feel like showing up? We'd brand a man a pedophile for life, making it so he can't work any job, or maybe has to live under bridge like the ones in Florida — all for nothing. Meanwhile, 75% of children who are raped are raped by family members… Way to go, tax dollars.
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And cue him being replaced in 3…2…1…
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Gee, how about the police install software on our computers that spies on us and tell them if we commit a crime?
How about our speedometers be hooked up to the internet, so they can ticket us if we go 56MPH in a 55MPH zone?
How about someone listen in on our phones, to make sure we aren't committing treason or conspiracy?Do those sound like police state solutions? Well, that's just what the MPAA and RIAA want installed on every computer. By law. And whenever you legally purchase music or video, you are in fact contributing to powerful corporations who will lobby to make this police state nightmare into an actual reality.
And all in the name of copyright. Meanwhile, they extend copyright, robbing us of public domain works. Every year, we should be getting a year's worth of works entered into the public domain. But the copylords keep extending it, keeping the people from having their art long after the original artists are dead. Fail.
April 19, 2010
REPOST: RANTS: 24 Product Placement, by SubGenius Rev. Ramona BackItOnUp
Posted by Claire CJS under Media, Rants, SubGenius, Video | Tags: 24, Jack Bauer |Leave a Comment
SPOILER ALERT – This contains some minor 24 spoilers. Reposted with permission of SubGenius Rev. Ramona BackItOnUp, who posted this on her Facebook, where the world cannot appreciate its awesomeness. Here we go:
Scene One
Jack Bauer: I sure am glad I’m retired from CTU! I never want to get stuck inside another nukular bomb again, that’s for sure. I just want to do some banking at Bank of America, because of their great customer service and low fees. Maybe I’ll spend some time with my daughter Kim, now that there are no national crises going on to endanger my family!
Tony Almeida: Not so fast, Jack. I have the explosives here in the microfilm. If you ever want to see your wife alive again, meet me in the parking lot of 7-11, home of the Big Gulp.
JB: Tony, you have a contract with 7-11 now?
TA: No, but I’m working on it. Mmmm, I love that coffee, made fresh every hour!
Chloe: Jack, I’m trying to upload the explosives to your PDA, but I can’t get the floor plan for the White House unless you get me a Snickers Bar. Snickers really satisfies!
JB: That’s fine, Chloe, but right now I need you to snap into a Slim Jim.
Renee: I’m Renee, and I’m relatively new to the show. Have I missed any calls from my Coldwell Banker?
TA: Renee, your head is shaped like a wedge. So was Jack’s wife’s. And the terrorist woman who had an affair with him. Their heads were as wedge-shaped as a slice of DiGiorno pizza. It’s not delivery – it’s DiGiorno.
All: (laughter)
Scene Two
JB: (On the phone) Kim, I realize I’ve been shooting heroin for an undetermined number of seasons, but you need to get on a plane out of California NOW. I can’t explain it, but I’m a Federal Agent, and I simply can not believe this is not butter.
Kim Bauer: No, Dad, you listen to ME. I’m built Ford tough and I’m not thinking different. I live here, and I have a family, and I’m busy drinking a Coors Light, which is the right beer now. I can’t uproot my life every time you call. You owe me an explanation!
JB: THE TERRORISTS ARE ON THE BOAT. STAY OFF THE CARNIVAL CRUISE. Kim, I repeat, Just Do It.
KB: Okay dad. I can hear you now.
JB: Good
Scene Three
Michelle Almeida: I can’t believe they killed me off in season four! Wait, what season are we up to now?
TA: What? I can’t hear you over this crunchy cereal I’m chewing. It has caused several humorous misunderstandings already so far.
JB: Won’t somebody please send me the schematics? I had to break a Russian’s fingers this morning and there’s still a nukular dirty bomb in the air shaft.
TA: That’s what he said.
All: (Laughter)
President David Palmer: We’re ALL in good hands now. Well, except that Russian.
23:57
23:58
23:59
24:00 (more…)
April 19, 2010
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He "allegedly" beat the fuck out of a kid filming him beating the fuck out of someone else. Here's wishing Noel Schwab contracts some cancer. Angus Chambers: You too, dick.
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John The Canadien's review of Nicole's birthday party from this weekend.
April 18, 2010
JOURNAL: YARD SALES: 2010 Expedition #3: Douche tries to fight me at a flea market, yard sale proselytizers think I’m hispanic
Posted by Claire CJS under Carolyn, Clio, Hobbies & Activities, People, Yard SalesLeave a Comment
Got up at 7:20AM, ate at Burger King, and made it out driving by 8AM. Went out until about noon, for a total of 4 hours.
Total spent $43.25 plus ~$7.50 gas for 45 miles of driving, for a total cost of $50.75.
We bought 13 items – 48 if you count each separate deodorant – for a total estimated value of $478.72, leading to a profit of $427.97.
That’s $107/hr as a couple or $53.50/hr per person. And to earn that much after taxes you’d really have to earn $612; money saved (by not having to spend it) is actually worth more than we realize when the government’s cut is taken into consideration.
Other interesting anecdotes:
1) The douche who tried to fight me. The flea market was sketchy enough, but then this guy tried to speed up and not let us pedestrians cross the street. I glared at him. I didn’t even flick him off! He just sat there in the middle of the road. He flicked me off, I got in my car, flicked him off, he got out and came at the car, he yelled, I yelled, I had my mini baseball bat in hand, but reversed out.. then, when we tried to leave the parking lot, he blocked us and the whole intersection. I laid down the horn non stop for a full 60 seconds — basically making everyone take notice that he was an asshole. He left. I guess he lost face and couldn’t go to the flea market after that. I declare victory.
2) The black folks who handed me a pamphlet when I arrived, saying, “Here! This is Jesus’s eternal salvation!” … Carolyn walked up with me, then they saw her, and said, “Oh, you’re American, not Hispanic!”, and handed her the English language version of the pamphlet. But I got the Spanish one. This was so funny that I wrapped them up as a joke gift for Nicole’s birthday party that night. We had fun looking through them. The guy was carrying a bag of sin. I commented, “I carry a bag o’ sin too! It’s between my legs.”
3) That guy who had that wacky blower thing had another yardsale this week. A re-run yard sale a week later? Will have to try to remember to avoid it. But this time he had a bottle of wine for only $3! I had grabbed it, but then some other lady already had dibs on it. I bid up to $4, but she matched it, and I let her have it. Later at another yard sale the same lady pulled up, and I was like “Watch out for this one, she’ll get your stuff before you!” and she was like “I had to pay $4 because of you!”, but we were all laughing.
- $10.00: messager, Relaxor Deep Knead (5 zons, shiatsu lumbar fingers, home outlet and car adapter) ($200-$260 through Sharper Image according to recall info, we’ll say EV:$200)
- $9.00: deodorant, Speedstick, small 0.5oz ($0.25/ea * 36–we filled the microwave we bought with them) ($1.27 new * 36 = $45.72 value)
- $5.00: scanner, HP scanjet 3970 ($103 new)
- $5.00: towels (4), brown, large & thick, very nice towels (EV:$30)
- $3.00: microwave (ours seems like it’s starting to go) (EV:$35)
- $3.00: game, Totally Gross Science game ($8 @ Amazon)
- $2.00: mirror, 13×18 frame / 9×14 mirror, wrought iron gothic framing (EV:$20 at least)
- $2.00: rake, small head type (ours has broken from use) (EV:$6)
- $2.00: car mats, rubber (Carolyn’s car has standing water in it a lot, the fabric mats just aren’t cutting it) (EV:$9)
- $1.00: glasses, full box, blue (we just wanted a lowball/rocks glass, but they had 6 rocks glasses plus tons of others) (EV:$15, though it could be over $30 really)
- $1.00: microcassette recorders (2) with tapes (5) ($0:changed batteries, they wound, but microphones on both appeared to be broken) *** WE-GOT-SCREWED ITEM-OF-THE-WEEK ***
- $0.25: book, Transforming the Difficult Child (joke gift for Nicole’s birthday party) ($7 used)
- FREE: snake toy, wooden, black (for the cats, who don’t really seem to care much about it unless you move it yourself) (EV:$0!)
The mirror we got has a larger mirror / smaller frame, gothic wrought iron not this birds-and-bugs crap, looks good on our red wall.
Maybe next time. Still looking for one of the ones with the external control jack...
Click here for other Yard Sale-related postings.
* EV stands for “Estimated Value”, which I estimate by looking things up in Google Shopping/Google/Amazon/Ebay. I don’t always deduct for an item being used, unless it’s actually in worse condition.
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