movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] Why did this only get a 4.9/10 on IMDB? It was much funnier than that!

HAIKU REVIEW: Comatose virgin.
Your girlfriend’s in playboy now!
Better go find her!

PEOPLE: The writer/directors/stars, relative nobodies Zach Cregger and Trever Moore, went on to do The Whitest Kids U Know. Maybe I should check that out? Also starring relative nobodies Raquel Alessi and Molly Stanton. Carolyn thinks that Tucker (Trever Moore) should have been played by Jim Carrey. I agree, but he would be too old for a role played by someone at ages 18 and 22. She also thinks that Zach Cregger reminded her of Ben Affleck, which I disagree with.

There are also a few somebodies in this movie: Hugh Heffner and Craig Robinson (Daryl [the black guy] from The Office, Knocked Up, Walk Hard:The Dewey Cox Story, Fanboys, Pineapple Express, Zack & Miri Make A Porno, Prop 8:The Musical) as a rapper named Horsedick.MPEG. Yes, you must say “dot em-peg” every time you address him!

Melissa Ordway was also in 17 Again, but played such a minor part that this really is more of a coincidence than anything.

QUIRKS: Comas, sex, virginity, abstinence, road trips, crazy firemen, Playboy centerfolds, the Playboy mansion, epilepsy, muscle atrophy, lesbians.

Basically, dudeface is about to lose his virginity and has a coma-inducing accident. Four years later, he wakes up to find his virgin girlfriend is now a Playboy centerfold. Still dealing with muscle atrophy, his DUMBASS friend kidnaps him for a road trip to the Playboy mansion. Hilarity ensues. (Actually, it had already ensued…)

VISUALS: Well, there is a party at the Playboy Mansion, and you can guess what that looks like!

MORALS: I think the main “moral” of this movie is that not having sex with someone you love — because you’re saving your virginity — can actually be a waste of your life.

CONCLUSION: This was best comedy we’ve seen since Fanboys and Sex Drive. Really, those 3 comedies have been my favorite out of the 41 comedies I have watched so far in 2009. (NOTE: This review was written July 30th, 2009.)

RATINGS: Netflix: 5/5 stars. IMDB: 9/10. A good comedy that keeps us laughing up ’til the end leaves little to be criticized. But at the same time, I sort of think straight-comedies (i.e. no significant dramatic elements) are almost incapable of ever attaining a 10/10.

RECOMMENDATION: If road-trip sex-fueled capers involving idiot friends appeals to you, you’re gonna like it. Honestly, we were both impressed that we were literally kept laughing up to the last second. I find it implausible that anyone who’s cool would not like this… But I’m sure people must hate it given its low ratings.

SIMILAR MOVIES: Sex Drive. Fanboys. Dumb & Dumber.

MOVIE QUOTE: Tucker Cleigh: “Well the country is like, what, 10 states wide? And each state is roughly 100 miles across. So that’s like 1000 miles. We’re going about 60 miles an hour, so we should be there in like 600 minutes.”

FRIENDS’ RATINGS: None, but this was a box office flop that only received 3.2/5 stars on Netflix. (3.5/5 stars for people who rate like me and 4.9/10 on IMDB.))))))))))))))) I guess some people don’t like having fun!

Mood: annoyed at pricks
Music: KMFDM / My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult – Naive