movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] Given the ultra-low IMDB rating of 2.3, I took this as a challenge: “Like this movie! I dare ya!” I picked this up because of Monica Keena & Julie Benz, not because I necessarily thought it was going to be a good movie.

HAIKU REVIEW: Bitchy highschool girls
Should not [highlight for spoilers] murder their classmates.
Stop being bitches!

UNCOMFORTABLE PLOT SUMMARY (inspired by this): [highlight for spoilers] Superficial murdereresses grow old and die.

PEOPLE: The main 3 girls are played by Julie Benz (Dexter, Angel, Saw 5, Jawbreaker, Rambo 4), Monica Keena (Rachel from Undeclared, Fifty Pills, Freddy Vs. Jason, The Devil’s Advocate), and Nicole Bilderback (Sex And Death 101, Clueless, Bring It On, and a few episodes of Dark Angel). Rival girl is played by the relatively unknown Suzanna Urszuly, who incidentally looks better as a brunette than a blonde.

And the teacher is played by Christopher Lloyd (Back To The Future, Taxi).

And Mrs. Witt? Played by Janet Leigh (her final film), famous for her roles in Psycho (1960) and The Manchurian Candidate (1962). It was also Jonathan Brandis’s final film. They both died.

QUIRKS: Based on the 1995 novel A Fate Totally Worse Than Death, which was itself a spoof of teen horror novels. Takes place in high school. It starts off feeling like a comedy, but then thriller/horror/murder mystery elements enter into the plot. We did not expect that.

VISUALS: Some of the hottest girls… made to not look hot (because of the curse). Don’t watch this for high school schoolgirl eye candy. Watch Mean Girls, Heathers, and Jawbreaker instead.

MORALS: Be careful who you talk in front of. They might be listening.

BAD STUFF: Low-budget, and yet the production company still went bankrupt in the middle of filming.

This movie could have been so much more. Unsuspecting viewers (like us) very well may be thrown off by the plot turning from generic highschool comedy to a thriller/murder mystery comedy. It was really hard to know whether it was trying to be a comedy, or a thriller. It kind of failed at being either, but succeeded in being a strange, quirky, haphazard hybrid of the two. Poorly executed, obvious plot progressions, cliched, and hokey at times. To add insult to injury, people watching it to see the beautiful Julie Benz and Monica Keena will be surprised to find out that this movie represents them both at there very ugliest.

CONCLUSION: Despite this movie’s many, many, MANY flaws, it was still somewhat entertaining, and had some funny moments. We were also creeped out as the plot got creepier. And Christopher Lloyd’s physical comedy helped out greatly, as this movie is quite lackluster in many regards.

RATINGS:
Clint: Netflix: 3/5 stars. IMDB: 6/10. (Generic pass.) Tempted to give it a 5.5/10 due to its flaws.
Carolyn: Netflix: 3/5 stars. IMDB: 6/10.
The native public rating for this movie is Netflix: 2.6/5 stars, IMDB: 2.3/10. Very poorly rated indeed. People hated this.

RECOMMENDATION: I can’t recommend this movie to anyone. People who read the original novel are going to be disappointed; people who didn’t aren’t going to know what direction the movie is going in. We enjoyed it because we are very forgiving with movies. If you are, too, then you might be able to stand this.

SIMILAR MOVIES: In a sense, this movie is Jawbreaker-lite, and Jawbreaker is Heathers-lite, so this is Heathers-lite-lite. However, that is a bit of a stretch. It also has a few aspects that can be found in Mean Girls.

MOVIE QUOTE: Tiffany: Why are we volunteering at this place?
Danielle: Because it looks good for our community service project, and so that Drew will like me. When I get what I want, I’m happy. And when I’m happy, I’m not a bitch.

Yup. That about sums up their horrible personalities.

COINCIDENCES:

1: (Stan Helsing, Bad Girls From Valley High) 2 movies 2 nights in a row where people have thumbtacks stuck to their head.

2: (The Faculty, Bad Girls From Valley High) 2 high-school movies within a week or so that had automatic bleachers, and someone/thing being caught in them as they collapse.

Mood: awake
Music: Pixies – Bailey’s Walk