movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link] After watching the fake Jackass 3 released awhile back, we finally get to see the REAL Jackass 3! There are some minor unmarked spoilers in this review; I talk about what they do sometimes. If you don’t want to know what stunts they do in advance, skip this review until after you watch it.

BEAVIS AND BUTT-HEAD!: WHOA WHOA WHOA! Beavis & Butt-head introduced the movie! Mike Judge voiced them, and it is BRAND NEW B&B animation. The first I’ve seen in a couple years (ever since their VH1 special). This is a great preview of the fact that new Beavis & Butt-head episodes will be coming out very soon now (and in fact are already out by the time this review is posted).

PEOPLE: The same ol’ Jackasses have come back for more. Steve-O… is sober now?!?!?!?! I guess that’s good; he no longer looks like somebody who’s going to show up in next week’s obituaries.

PLOT SUMMARY: I’ll quote Homer Simpson instead: “Man fall down. Funny.”

Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville! Welcome to Jackass!

QUIRKS: Hilarity, violence, disgustingness, and social comedy.

One sketch has Johnny Knoxville dressed as an old man who makes out with his pig-tail wearing grandaughter. You can imagine how people reacted. HILARIOUS.

Another time, they literally simulate the famous Memorex commercial by having a guy sit in a chair in front of speaker — but with a jet engine blowing on him. If you’ve never seen someone try to run towards a jet engine going at full blast — it is some of the funniest shit that I have ever seen in my life. These fuckers are INSANE. Absolutely insane.

And yet they seem to be this tightly-knit group of individuals who genuinely care about each other as they deliberately try to injure themselves and others. They are quite the paradoxical group.

Animals were actually “harmed”. I don’t think anything was killed or deliberately injured for the sake of watching it be hurt, but they probably killed a few bees defending themselves from their stings (using a beehive full of KILLER bees and playing tether ball with it is probably not advisable), and definitely threw some snakes around (snakes don’t seem to mind this, though).

Midget fights? Port-o-potties? Blowdart gun? Killer bees? Pits of snakes? Bulls? Attack dogs? Hungry boars? Automatic paintball guns? This movie has it all. These are the modern day Evil Kneivels.

VISUALS: We did not watch this in 3-D, but it probably would have been pretty cool to see in 3-D. A lot of the things they did are things that nobody has ever done before. And since this is “reality” and not a scripted story, why not make it 3-D?

They actually shot some video at 1000 frames per second, to be played back at super-slow speeds. I truly did not know how a human face reacts to being punched–until I saw it in slow motion. This movie taught me something.

The movie opens and closes with some insane shots of the Jackass crew being hurt done in a professional/non-amateur way. Super-high film speeds let us see the action unfold in super-slow motion. I thought the beginning was fake — with CGI — but at the end, they show the shooting of the beginning, and it seems to be real. These “pro” shots are actually quite beautifully done.

They did probably add some stuff with CGI, like extra bees. There are reports of this. Doesn’t mean that the stunts weren’t real, just that they may have been exaggerated for dramatic effect. Not as big of a deal to me as it is to some.

Celebrity Pictures - Johnny Knoxville

SOUNDTRACK: Lots o’ songs. Better than some soundtracks. Nothing I really care for, though.

WILHELM SCREAM: No need. Real screams are much better. They tied a sports car to a guy’s tooth and pulled it at 60MPH, shot at 1000 frames per second. His screams were the stuff of dental nightmares. Yet every time anyone is hurt, they crack a smile before they are even done screaming. These guys are who I’d want to fight zombies with me.

BAD STUFF: There is some gross stuff. But that is just part of the intensity of jackass. Gross, violent, socially awkward — these are the 3 types of comedy they traffic in. I’d say it’s about 75% violent, 20% gross, and 5% socially awkward humor. The grossest Jackass moments are in Jackass 2.5 and maybe Jackass 2. For instance, nobody drunks horse semen or cans full of spit in this movie. Nobody eats vomit in this movie. I think it’s actually (a bit) less gross than most Jackass movies.

CONCLUSION: Without a doubt, the top 5 times I’ve laughed the hardest in the past year were all while watching this movie. I really cannot remember laughing this hard, ever… But I’m sure I have. There also seemed to be a *tad* less gross stuff than usual (it took 20 minutes before anything gross happened; that’s a record; Jackass 2.5 still wins the gross award). This movie was not only technically superior in terms of filming, but was possibly FUNNIER and more well put together than previous Jackass movies. Like a train wreck, or a fat chick in spandex, you make yourself watch, even though you’re never 100% fully sure that you want to.

RATINGS:

Clint: Netflix: 5/5 stars. IMDB: 9.4/10. This was possibly better than previous Jackass movies.

Carolyn: Netflix: 5/5 stars. IMDB: 9/10. She hates admitting how much she loves these movies, because they also traumatize her a bit :)

The native public rating for this movie is: IMDB: 7.2/10, Netflix: 4.1/5 stars (Netflix‘s predicted rating for us was 4.4/5 stars–in the right direction).

RECOMMENDATION: Not for pussies. But for those who can take it, this is some of the craziest shit ever done by human beings anywhere. A real-life circus act has NOTHING on these Jackasses. Walking a tightrope, even without a safety net, is not nearly as badass as literally standing in front of a charging buffalo and letting it hit you with its horns.

BTW, the Jackass 3.5 sequel should be out by now. It’s probably good too, but probably not as good as Jackass 3, as it is the scenes they shot and didn’t use for Jackass 3.

MOVIE QUOTES:

Steve-O: “Why do I have to be Steve-O?”

Bam Margera: [after Christ Pontius complains about being stung in the face by a scorpion] “What did you think was gonna happen?” [At that point, Pontius starts to reply back, but breaks into a smile when he realizes that OF COURSE THE SCORPION WAS GOING TO BITE HIM.]

OTHER REVIEWS:

OutlawVern reviewed it here. “…There’s this sense of brotherhood, but still, man, you don’t want to be a member of this brotherhood.”

RottenTomatoes: 63%Mood: annoyed as hell
Music: NoMeansNo – Ashes