movie coverI'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link] [Netflix link]

PLOT SUMMARY: Let’s find the fountain of youth!

UNCOMFORTABLE PLOT SUMMARY (inspired by this): [highlight for spoilers] Selfish mermaids prevent mankind from immortality.

PEOPLE: Johnny Depp, of course. Penelope Cruz is now added — yay! She’s so friggin’ hot! Ian McShane (Deadwood) as Blackbeard.

CONCLUSION: Not gonna go into a lot of detail here, as this is a popular franchise and people probably already either saw this, or aren’t. The franchise is getting ancient, but they’re still making another 2 movies, so it’s still going strong. I didn’t really find this any better or worse than the other movies. They’re all kind of the same thing to me. It was a high-budget fantasy adventure with pirates and ships and shit. How can you go wrong? The previous movies have proved that the idea works. Keep doin’ it, boys. I can’t think of any other pirate movies I’d watch.

Clint: Netflix: 4/5 stars. IMDB: 8/10.
Carolyn: Netflix: 4/5 stars. IMDB: 7/10.
The native public rating for this movie is: IMDB: 6.8/10, Netflix: 3.9/5 stars (Netflix‘s predicted rating for us was 4.1/5 stars).Mood: hungry
Music: Atari Teenage Riot – Collapse Of History