August 2020

Claire: 2/5 stars, 4.6/10.

Carolyn: 2.6/5 stars, 5/10.

Native ratings: 3.4/5 stars Netflix, 5.6/10 IMDB.

Carolyn’s thoughts: Not a comedy. Repeat: NOT A COMEDY! Don’t be fooled by what IMDB says and the presence of June Diane Raphael. This is a drama. It was OK, but nothing really special and it was kind of “blah.” It was pretty sad, and there wasn’t enough funny to counteract the sad.

Claire: Yes, pretty sad indeed. Usually a few shots of alcohol make a movie more interesting for me, but in this case it simply took my disinterest in what was going on within the movie and converted it into unconsciousness. And I might rate the unconsciousness higher on IMDB. I mean, it’s not BAD…

But anyway…What an utter, underwhelming disappointment this was. My girlfriend June Diane Raphael has no business being in this.

Directed by Shari Springer Berman (American Splendor, Wanderlust) & Robert Pulcini (American Splendor, Wanderlust). Written by Michelle Morgan.

Kristen Wiig (Young Lucille Bluth in Arrested Development, Date Night, Adventureland, Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Knocked Up, The Brothers Solomon, How To Train Your Dragon, Saturday Night Live, Despicable Me, 2 eps of The Simpsons, 1 ep of Drunk History) as Imogene.
Annette Bening (Mars Attacks, American Beauty, Postcards From The Edge) as Zelda, the mom.
Matt Dillon (There’s Something About Mary, Wild Things, Drugstore Cowboy, 1 ep of The Simpsons) as George / The Bousche, the mom’s boyfriend.
Darren Criss (Glee, A Very Potter Senior Year and A Very Potter Sequal [what? a musical Harry Potter? hehehehe], 1 ep of Archer) as Lee, the rentor.
Christopher Fitzgerald as Ralph, the brother.
June Diane Raphael (NTSF:SD:SUV::, Anchorman 2, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Year One, 3 eps of American Dad, 1 ep of Drunk History) as Dara, the fake best friend.
Natasha Lyonne (American Pie movies, Detroit Rock City, Scary Movie 2, Kate & Leopold, 1 ep of NTSF:SD:SUV::) as Allyson.
Bob Balaban (Clockwatchers, 5 eps of Seinfeld) as Maxwell, the father.
Michelle Morgan (1 ep of Kid Notorious) as Georgina.
Brian Petsos as Peter Van Woodsen, the ex-boyfriend.


VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: G.I. Joe 2: Retaliation (2013) (watched in 3-D)

JSun: 5/5, 2/10 …. He said it’s his favorite movie of all time, but only rated it 2 out of 10.  A bold choice, indeed. “I said 10!!!” No you didn’t! ;)
Claire: 4/5, 7.6/10
Evan: 4/5, 7/10.
Carolyn: 3/5, 7/10.
Sean: “3-D was 10/10, experience was 10/10″…but it seemed pretty clear that he really hated the movie, hehe.
Native ratings: 3.4/5 stars Netflix, 5.8/10 IMDB.

This movie was utterly fucking ridiculous, but it knew it was being ridiculous.  Watching it with a bunch of friends heightened the enjoyment of this movie, and if we were alone, it probably wouldn’t have been as fun. But isn’t that true about most things?

This, however, was totally over-the-top. Even compared to the first A-Team movie!! And that’s saying a lot!

I have to admit…The first one was better.  But there were certain aspects that this movie pulled off better, like making things comicbook/cartoon-ishly ridiculous.  I certainly would recommend this to anyone who enjoyed G.I. Joe 1.

The 3-D was awesome too; this was one of the first movies we watched with our new Samsung 240Hz 3-D Smart TV.

Directed by Jon M. Chu (some Justin Beiber stuff).

Written by Rhett Reese (Zombieland, Monsters Inc, Cruel Intentions 3) & Paul Wernick (Zombieland).

Starring Dwayne Johnson (The Rock in wrestling, Fast & Furious 6-7, The Mummy Returns, 1 ep o Transformers Prime) as Roadblock.
Jonathan Pryce (Sam Lowry in Brazil, G.I. Joe 1, Pirates Of The Caribbean movies, What A Girl Wants, The Adventures Of Baron Munchausen) as President.
Byung-hun Lee (Red 2, G.I. Joe 1) as Storm Shadow.
Elodie Yung (The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo remake) as Jinx, Storm Shadow’s cousin.
Ray Stevenson (Thor, The Three Musketeers, 9 eps of Dexter) as Firefly.
D.J. Cotrona as Flint.
Adrianne Palicki (Red Dawn, 4 eps of Robot Chicken, 4 eps of Titan Maximum, 1 ep of Smallville, 1 ep of Family Guy) as Jaye.
Channing Tatum (Side Effects, This Is The End) as Duke.
Ray Park (Darth Maul in Star Wars: Episode I: The Phantom Menace, Heroes, Fanboys, X-Men, ) as Snake Eyes.
Luke Bracey (225 eps of Home And Away) as Cobra Commander.
Walton Goggins (Django Unchained, Predators, Machete Kills, The Bourne Identity, The Crow 3: Salvation, 1 ep of Unsupervised) as Warden Nigel James.
Arnold Vosloo (Habib Marwan in 17 eps of 24, The Mummy movies, 1 ep of Young Justice) as Zartan.
Joseph Mazzello (The Social Network) as Mouse.
Nick Erickson as President Picture Double.
RZA (A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas, Repo Men, Due Date, Funny People) as Blind Master.
Matt Gerald (Avatar, Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines, Magnolia, 2 eps of Dexter) as Havoc.
Douglas M. Griffin (This Is The End, Oldboy remake) as Doctor.
Joe Chrest (Oldboy remake, Red, Ocean’s Thirteen, Clockwatchers) as Chief of Staff.
Bruce Willis as General Joe Colton.
James Carville (Fox News commenter) as James Carville.
Ryan Hansen (Superhero Movie, 1 ep of Childrens Hospital) as Grunt.
DeRay Davis (10 eps of The Boondocks, uncredited in Get Him To The Greek) as Stoop.


Claire: 5/5 stars, 8.2/10.
Carolyn: 4/5 stars, 8/10.
Native ratings: 3.6/5 stars Netflix, 6.3/10 IMDB.

2 salesmen lose their jobs, so they decide to *compete* to become employees at Google. My god… Is our economy so bad that even our comedy movies are about getting jobs?!

The fact of the matter is, however: Excellent cast and writing. Entertaining, funny, and the Googliest movie I’ve ever seen. It seems like such a given that anybody who likes technology and comedy should watch this.

But I’d go further and say this movie has a universal appeal, esepecially with today’s economy. Pretty much everyone has suffered through the indignity of being forced to compete against your peers for those meager (and sometimes not-so-meager) scraps of bread our slavelords allow us.

So let’s watch these poor schmucks be put through a ringer far worse than the ones we’ve been put through… And lets get drunk and laugh at them! Win!

Directed by Shawn Levy (Date Night, The Pink Panther (2006), 1 ep of Birds Of Prey).
Written by Vince Vaughn and Jared Stern (Wreck-It Ralph).

Starring Vince Vaughn (Made, Swingers, Anchorman movies, Wedding Crashers, Fred Claus, Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story, Four Christmases, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, 1 ep of Mr. Show) as Billy McMahon.
Owen Wilson (Wedding Crashers, Meet The Parents movies, Bottle Rocket, Fantastic Mr. Fox, Zoolander, Armageddon, The Cable Guy, 1 ep of Drunk History) as Nick Campbell.
Rose Byrne (I Give It A Year, Moira from X-Men: First Class, Get Him To The Greek, 28 Weeks Later, Star Wars: Episode 2, 1 ep of Portlandia) as Dana, the employee whom Nick has a crush on.
Aasif Mandvi (Movie 43, The Dictator, It’s Kind Of A Funny Story, The Last Airbender movie, Spider-Man 2, 1 ep of King Of The Hill, 1 ep of Curb Your Enthusiasm) as Mr. Chetty.
Max Minghella (The Social Network, How To Lose Friends & Alienate People) as Graham Hawtrey, the leader of the rival team.
Josh Brener (2 eps of The Big Bang Theory) as Lyle, the 23-year old team mentor.
Dylan O’Brien (39 eps of Teen Wolf) as Stuart, the “cool” teammate.
Tiya Sircar (17 Again, 1 ep of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles) as Neha, the “fun girl” teammate.
Tobit Raphael as Yo-Yo Santos, the home-schooled teammate.
Josh Gad (Mondo in Good Vibes) as Headphones.
Jessica Szohr (Fired Up!) as Marielena.
Rob Riggle (President Of The Navy in NTSF:SD:SUV, The Hangover, The Lorax, Talladega Nights: The Ballad Of Ricky Bobby, 6 eps of Human Giant, 4 eps of American Dad, 1 ep of Ugly Americans, 1 ep of Childrens Hospital, 1 ep of Drunk History) as Randy
Eric Andre (The Eric Andre Show, The Invention Of Lying, 2 eps of Curb Your Enthusiasm) as Sid.
Gary Anthony Williams (Stevie’s dad in Malcolm In The Middle, Uncle Ruckus in The Boondocks, Kung Fu Panda movies, China IL, Mad, The Goode Family, 8 eps of The Eric Andre Show, 3 eps of Star Wars: The Clone Wars, 3 eps of Weeds, 1 ep of Beware The Batman) as Bob Williams.
John Goodman as Nick and Billy’s Boss (uncredited).
Will Ferrell as Matress Salesman (uncredited), Nick’s sister’s boyfriend. I wonder why he and John Goodman were uncredited.
Also: B.J. Novak (The Office, Knocked Up, Inglourious Basterds, The Smurfs movies) as Male Interviewer.