COMEDY: Microsoft Songsmith-generated “Reverse Karaoke” revisited (includes funniest Metallica video ever) [VIDEO INCLUDED]

My God Microsoft Songsmith is straight from hell. These “Reverse Karaokes” where they substitute in computer-generated music over the original music, but leave the original vocals, are like a train wreck. This is what MTV is like in Hell. This must be what it’s like to be tone deaf and have no taste in music. No, strike that. Even a tone death person with no music taste should still be horrified by what can be done. Oh, the horror. This particular one had me, Carolyn, Tabbitha, and John The Canadien laughing our ASSES off. I was crying by the end.

This Metallica song, Blackened, known by many, doesn’t have an official music video. So the guy made one. My God, it adds to the horror of Microsoft Songsmith-generated music by also adding funny visuals:

And if that had you in tears, you might want to see The Ace Of Spades, by Motorhead — with very soft [Microsoft Songsmith-generated] music:

Wow.

Nirvana‘s In Bloom:

“Kurt would kill himself again after listening to this shit.”

Yes… I think Kurt would.

Ian: There’s a Sonic Youth one too.

 

COMEDY: PARODY: Carmina Burana mis-heard lyrics

At this point, I proclaim this video to have medicinal properties–because I feel much better after watching it:

Oh. My. God!!

 

COMEDY: You choose, You lose.

 

COMEDY: Trainspotting parodies

The original:

The parodies:

 

links for 2008-06-18

• FRIENDS: Introducing Christian D’s blog
  No posts yet, but he started it due to not being able to keep up with updating people on him & Shannon’s current trip to Tokyo….
  (tags: friends blogs ChristianD WordPress)
• FRIENDS: Introducing Jon B’s blog: Veal’s Pix
  Jon B started a blog awhile back to do movie reviews… Though he hasn’t posted in awhile, there are still a lot of good movie reviews worth checking out here.
  (tags: friends blogs JonB WordPress media video movies reviews)
• OLD MEDIA VS NEW MEDIA/COPYRIGHT: Associated Press expects you to pay to license 5-word quotations! Fair Use doesn’t exist in a society where people are scared to assert their rights. NOBODY SHOULD PAY THIS. Another industry spastically flailing.
  The funny thing is that AP was original a grassroots “open source” kind of movement to fight the competition of big business. Now, AP *IS* big business, and is making threats against bloggers: the new threat. $12.50 for 5 words? Fuck you, AP!
  (tags: politics copyright OldMedia NewMedia AP AssociatedPress bloggers FairUse GeekPolitics bullshit licensing legal threats BoingBoing news articles blogging blogs finance intellectualProperty)
• SOFTWARE: Free Undelete Utility for NTFS and FAT16/FAT32 filesystems (WinXP, Win2K, WinNT)
  [[[ insert “less freeware/software is available to macintosh/apple users” gloat here ]]]
• [UPDATE, 7/31/2008] Greg Z tried this out, and it wouldn’t undelete his files. But he found another utility called Undelete Plus, which worked for him. It can be found at http://www.undelete-plus.com/, and seems to be free in every way.
• (tags: software free freeware undelete files NTFS FAT16 FAT32 Windows)
• COMEDY: Guitar Hero for the Mac
  It’s an image. Open and laugh.
  (tags: geek comedy music games computers Macintosh GuitarHero guitars parody)
• WAR ON TERROR/VETERANS/CORPORATIONS: Mentally Distressed Veterans Used to Test Suicide-Linked Drugs – “Disposable Heroes” is not just a Metallicrap song anymore
  Good ol’ Pfizer of course says nothing’s really wrong here. How many people unnecessarily died over Vioxx again? (some estimates say 100,000) The problem with capitalist health care is that making money is NOT the most important thing with health care.
  (tags: politics corporations medical pharmaceuticals Pfizer veterans DisposableHeroes government drugs WarOnTerror Chantix VeteransAdministration doctors guineaPigs PostTraumaticStressDisorder PTSD police arrests FDA JamesElliott suicides violence negligence ethics FAA pilots capitalism)
• POLICE STATE: Philadelphia sets up cameras in neighborhood; residents protest via flyers; cops raid home, detain all for 12 hours without charges, rummage through possessions, seize their laptop, and legally prevent them from living there anymore.
  And people wonder why I am hesitant to criticize my local police department. Don’t exercise your right to free speech — you’ll be fucked. This is how I’d expect soviet russia or china to behave. It’s sad that America has no more freedom than our enemies.
  (tags: politics AbuseOfAuthority police harassment intimidation warranteless searches warrantelessSearches rights ConstitutionalRights FreedomOfSpeech FreedomOfPress FreedomOfCriticism criticism Philadelphila detained seizure seized hardware laptop condemned homeowners disgustingComments disgusting comments NoHopeForAmerica critcism cameras surveillance privacy)
• MOVIES: Teeth: The Banned Teeth Poster
  I saw “Teeth” recently, and it was quite good! Rarely do horror movies have nerves knotted up as much. Though it’s not a “scary” horror. There’s no monsters. The main character is one that can be sympathized with.
  (tags: media video movies Teeth banned posters bannedPosters EmpireOnline articles)
• TOYS: WANT!!!!! (WHAT COULD GO WRONG?): Flaming footbag toy banned in South Australia
  Holy CRAP i want one of these!!!!!!!!!!! You douse it in gasoline, light it, and kick it around while it’s on fire! I’m sure this could be safely used on a beach (near the water in case you catch on fire)! muahahaha
  (tags: toys fire balls fireBalls FlamingFootbag bans banned Australia SouthAustralia TheAge news articles)

 

HAPPY EASTER! Egggasm!

What is EggGASM? Just click to find out! This is a delightfully subversive–yet harmless–spin on the old Easter tradition. After all, the Christians stole their holidays from the Pagans, for the most part. Let’s steal it back. And while we’re on it — let’s make sure Halloween (my favorite holiday) stays alive too.

 

CARTOONS vs MOVIES: Simpsons References, annotated with screenshots

Simpsons screenshots, side-by-side with the movies they’ve referenced. Quite interesting — I did not know all of those references. The photos start HERE.

 

LINKS: Garfield comedy, RIAA lawsuits help musicians about as much as prozac helps depressed people, overly-harsh punishments

The peer-reviewed journal research article behind the news stories about antidepressants working no better than a placebo. This link was going to disappear from New Scientist story (New Scientist wants a subscription), so I needed to save it. Speaking of mental health, apparently if you take Garfield out of Garfield, you get a comic strip about Jon Arbuckle: A deranged schizophrenic man who talks to himself. It’s twistedly funny. Check out this comedy gold: Garfield minus Garfield. And also speaking of crazy — you know the RIAA lawsuits against the very fans who fund them? These were for the artists, right? WRONG! No artist has seen a penny. Just like the karaoke licensing scam, the artists don’t actually get any of this money, so it’s foolish to support such licensing under the guise of “protecting the artists”. So here’s the article: RIAA Keeps Settlement Money, Artists May Sue. Still, the RIAA isn’t as bad as Asshole Officers James Bryant and Chris Webley of Coquille — some guy broke a windshield, so, during the arrest, they broke his neck. He is now on a respirator for life. Of course the police think this is totally acceptable — after all, the guy swung at them! (Or so they say.) What this article doesn’t mention is that it’s more dangerous to be a fisherman, taxi driver, or garbage man, than it is to be a cop. They hurt people not out of self-defense, but unjustified paranoia. Douchebags!

 

MUSIC/COMEDY: “You sound like a dying cow in the begginning [sic].” Worst cover of “Hey” by the Pixies ever, or hilarious entertainment?

Okay, I didn’t even listen to Pixies a year ago, and still only know 1 album, but I have to say that “Hey” is a damn good song, like my favorite song for the past few months. So I was watching a different cover of the song on YouTube every day, and… Well, you just have to experience it for yourself. Listen for the dying cow after “been tryin’ to meet you”:

Please find the comment that says “you sound like a dying cow in the beginning” (2nd page) and click the thumbs up. Carolyn can never hear this song again without imagining a cow. Best comment ever.

 

LINKS: Cops Vs. Firefighters (x2!), Scientist Valentines, and sucker taserings

It’s very funny when tiny minds collide, and cops have firefighters arrested for hurting their pride. ZbigniewBrzezinskisuch examples today, which surprises me a lot. Also, yet another sucker tasering — weren’t tasers supposed to replace deadly force? Isn’t that how they pushed them on us, in the beginning? Sometimes people who use slippery slope arguments are right, and civil rights is invariably one of those areas. Also, make sure the check out the Scientific Valentines, since it is valentines day. Carl Sagan saying “I’ve been Sagan all my love for you” is just too good.

 

COMEDY: VIDEO: Why Candid Camera did not succeed in Russia…

 

LINKS: LOLinator, Salvia, cop stats, HILARIOUS ’24’ parody, tasers, Library Of Congress, “Human Fear” weapon

i can haz websiet? 24: 1994 Pilot – Jack Bauer saves w/AOL. The Library Of Congress is on flickr! Virginia House Of Delegates Passes Salvia Divinorum Ban. WAKE UP: It’s Safer to Be a Cop Than a Farmer. Taser death. Sucker-tasing of innocent caught on cam. “Human Fear” weapon uses pheromones.