SubGenius


Sister Decadence had a party. Anna Dynamite was there. It was pretty fun.

At some point I went outside and cleaned up and got in trouble for doing so. Later I crashed on the floor. Sister Decadence laid next to me. At some point, I had to roll over or something, and my hand kinda touched her ass/back leg, so while I was there, I swept/brushed a little more than it would have otherwise been, and then she accused me of groping her. I was like, “Well yeah, I did, kinda”, since it was only like 50% on purpose. And that was that.

Later they dropped me off at my car (even though I drove there?), and I realized I didn’t have the keys, and would have to make it from some other city (DC?) home on foot. I was in alleyways and avoiding shady people. Somehow I almost made it home. I forget how it worked out. I think Carolyn was at her business trip and was just arriving back.

''Dreams... They're the hurricanes that wash the soulfilth from the superdome of our nightminds.'' --Xavier:Renegade Angel

“Dreams… They’re the hurricanes that wash the soulfilth from the superdome of our nightminds.”
Xavier:Renegade Angel (more…)

Well, maybe not right now, but at 8PM EST, this link should be live:

Go here to watch it: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/fedcoms-presents.

http://www.ustream.tv/flash/live/1/5896830?v3=1 (more…)

So, I actually remixed a song. Or, rather, a segment of a song.

Fellow SubGenius Orpheus Stain had the idea of doing an Exquisite Corpse audio project — breaking up a long track into 5 parts, and having different people remix each part. I, uh, appropriated samples from The Simps0ns (mainly Lisa tripping, and Marge talking about LSD), Doom (the game), The Three Stooges, and even the Moon8 album (Pink Floyd’s Dark Side Of The Moon re-done as 8-bit Nintendo music).

Most selections were based on my WAV file collection from the early 1990s… I’m too lazy to actually decide on a sample and then find it; rather I look at what I have and incorporate random things. I’d never done anything like this, and learned how to use the program Mixcraft after determining that CoolEdit wasn’t quite powerful enough for this specific situation.

Anwyay, here’s the original blurb from Orpheus Stain, Ministry Of Slack:

While putting together AlcheMinistry Labs episode 23 : The Chaos! : I came across a track called “JD lives on” from The John Dillinger died for you society on Last.fm. It was a semi-repetitve 7+ minute long piece, but far too predictable to go onto a podcast in honour of Eris Discrodia! I realized, cutting it into 5 pieces and handing them out to anyone who wanted a slice could indeed make it much more chaotic. “JD lives on” is now “John dilinger died for you and is still alive!”.

  1. Orpheus Stain – 23 Skidoo : instrumental.
  2. Pontifex Soddi -John Dillinger is processed.
  3. UUAR UUZARE – Shot down in his tracks.
  4. Clint — i.e. ME!! — aka Rev. Xanatos Satanicos Bombasticos – John Dillinger is still alive.
  5. Orpheus Stain – Dillinger beat the shit out of those motherfucking Illuminati cocksuckers.
    You can download the mp3 here: http://www.divshare.com/download/12360028-d56. A better filename than the default download filename would be “Orpheus Stain, Pontifex Soddi, Erazuu, Clint aka Xanatos – John Dillinger Died For You And Is Still Alive!.mp3”

    You can tell where my part begins: The first sample from The Simps0ns.

    This message is brought to you by The John Dillinger died for you and is still alive Society. (more…)

“If nobody hates you enough to kill you, you have erred on the side of placating the majority. If nobody demands that you go fuck yourself, you are the twitching, glistening, pink puckering anus of the universe and fate can’t wait to bend you over and molest you right in your sorry life. If you are not the worst asshole you can be, you are squandering the beautiful privilege given by the almighty.”
-Rev. Back It On Up, Church Of The SubGenius (more…)

Read about day 4 here. Day 3 here2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

As always, click through to comment on any picture individually on flickr, or to see the full-size…

We went to X-Day again this year. It was a totally different experience than last year. It rained for the first three days we were there, but then it got really nice for the weekend. It was never overbearingly hot.

WAKING UP

July 5th — X-Day — is always the hardest day. Since X-Day — The Rupture — occurs at 7:00AM on July 5th, it’s tough. Most people are up late partying and drinking, and nobody is in the mood to get up at 6:55AM. Some lucky people are still awake from the night before. But most people are asleep at 7AM.

Granted, there’s not a single time, 24 hours a day, that you can’t walk around and eventually find people during X-Day…… But getting up at 7AM on a Sunday? That’s for people who go to church, not church of the subgenius! ;)

Last year Carolyn & I utterly failed to make The Rupture. Sure, we woke up in our tent, and heard the noise… But I was too hungover from slamming too many bears while trying to get the taste of awful homemade absinthe out of my mouth. I was a casualty on July 4th, 2008!

But not July 4th, 2009! We actually successfully woke up! And actually made it to The Rupture!

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0349 - Carolyn's Misfits jacket - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Carolyn’s Misfits hoodie accidentally left out all night

First off, we went to the Roundhouse, to warm up by the fire. This was also the Most Precarious Fire Set-Up Ever. I mean, check that picture out — those logs are practically levitated off the ground. Crazy, crazy. Will it fall down and fling hot stuff at us? We were passed some orange juice drink (pictured above). It wasn’t just orange juice… This was about 6:45AM or so.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0350 - morning after the bonfire - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Precarious fire is precarious

THE RUPTURE

As we walked to the main pavilion / saucer landing site, I got to use my noisemaker [recorder mouthpiece*] to bring misery to all the people who didn’t get out of their tents. Total awesomeness!

*[ i.e. the recorder instrument they have you play in music class in elementary school]

So, as it stands, we did, in fact, make it to The Rupture this year… The 15-25 lucky SubGenii who made it there were all presented with a drink called “Bob’s Pipe Juice”, which was a foul, brown, nasty-tasting alcoholic drink. Try as we might, any drink designed to taste like pipe juice is obviously not very palatable. We discretely poured ours into the trash cans.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0352 - The Rupture - Carolyn, Clint - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
909 Jim Jones Cult members agree: Bob’s Pipe Juice sucks.

Everyone gathered around, waiting for the pleasure saucers to come…

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0354 - The Rupture - people - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
The Rupture – SubGenii gathered

Those of us who had cameras or audio/video recording devices got ready to commemorate this important day in SubGenius history…

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0355 - The Rupture - Dr. Hal, Reverend Stang, Pantiara - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Yetimen, start your recorders!

The moment of truth drew nearer, and nearer. We counted down to 7:05AM, and smoked the last cigarette we would ever smoke before leaving planet Earth:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0357 - The Rupture - Pisces, Eggplant, K-Ren, Stang, Sudz, Clint, Rose, Carolyn - (by George Burgyan) - 585239460_ybHCo-X2 - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
The Rupture (by George Burgyan)

But alas, the saucers did not come.


Our
Rupture video (1m24s)

Agent Lloyd’s rupture video. I love the last couple seconds, where you can see Bug and Rev. Panik trying to jump up into the saucers.

Damnit, “Bob”!

You screwed us again!

Well–maybe not. The Conspiracy keeps changing the calendars around. We may never know when it’s really 1998. But it definitely wasn’t 1998 this year.

NOW WHAT?!?!

Well….

This is awkward.

We’re not dead. (!!??!!)

And neither are you, Bobdammit.

Well, no what? Take pictures of the ground?

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0358 - The Rupture - dew on the grass - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
dew on the grass

Sit around a bit, and ponder the fact that all the pinks aren’t going to be left to fry in a hell on earth?

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0360 - The Rupture - Clint, everyone - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Ponder the existential existence of being lorded over by JHVH-1, and wondering what its motivation for us is?

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0361 - The Rupture - Clint - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Maybe it was my fault, somehow?

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0362 - The Rupture - ___, Stang, ____, Lord Cyclohexane, 808 - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

"What in the hell do you think you're doing!?"

Well, while we’re still here and in Brushwood, may as well take note of the pretty pagan thingamabobs:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0364 - The Rupture - dream catcher thing - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
pagan thingamabob is pagany

And maybe go check out the graffiti board… Completely different from last year’s…

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0351 - sign - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Here’s last year’s, for comparison:

https://i0.wp.com/farm4.static.flickr.com/3230/2756280054_89d0e86521.jpg
Well, Christie & 808 have candy, in this strange, orb-like container. Let’s eat some!!!
20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0365 - The Rupture - 808 - trail mix - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

They made us some awesome peanut butter & marshmallow fluff sandwiches that were heated up on the sandwich press. I had never thought of using that for a peanut butter sandwich, but it was a definite win.

So now that we’re alive, we still have a day of stuff to do. Maybe catch a little sleep, then wake up before noon. OH HAI, A KITTY!!!

KITTY!!!

This kitty lives at Brushwood. She was really friendly. Someone told us she had had kittens but they all found homes. Tangent & Dammit Janet might have gotten one of them.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0374-diptych-GEDC0366 - Carolyn petting the Brushwood kitty - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Carolyn petting the Brushwood kitty

This kitty was insanely sociable!


Brushwood kitty – stalking, attacking (1m4s)

kitty!


Brushwood kitty – petting (1m12s)

MORE WANDERING

So anyway, we checked out 808 and Christie’s campsite, which was strangely far away compared to last year. I’d never actually been on the other side of the field. Yes, we drove. We’re SubGeniuses, damnit! SLACK IS OUR GAME.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0378 - view from across the woods at alt.slack woods - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

view from the alt.slack woods; we spent most of our time directly forward, on the opposite side, near the four flushers. You can see the roundhouse.

Funny stuff ’round the alt.slack woods:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0379 - Witch parking only - All others will be toad - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Witch parking only – All others will be toad

808’s trademark parachute was put to use, as always (this thing has visited Assateague too):

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0381 - 808 & Christie's campsite - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
808 & Christie’s campsite – full of supplies

I ran into a random “OH!” sighting:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0382 - OH - on the boat - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
OH!

And I took a picture if Rev. Panik’s painting, which ultimately became the upper image on the official 12X-Day page, as well as the Facebook profile image for the girl who was dancing naked around the bonfire in real life:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0384 - Rev. Panik's painting - Lord Cyclohexane, drunk naked girl @ yesterday's bonfire - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Rev. Panik’s painting

I also found out someone — Christopher Lee — had my exact shirt! Except Clint’s shirt has permanent latex on it from Chris H‘s liquid latex party back around 2000.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0385 - Clint, Christopher Lee - a meeting of the shirts - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
a meeting of the shirts – don’t forget to bring a towel

THE BOBBY AWARDS

Unlike people who had to work Monday, this Sunday we were still not 100% sure if we wanted to leave today or tomorrow/Monday.  Carolyn wanted to get on the road if they were leaving, but Clint wanted to stay for the Bobby Awards. And that we did.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0386 - SubGenius signs - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
SubGenius signs @ main pavilion stage

I believe this year’s Bobby Awards were made by Suzie The Floozie and Popess Pantiara:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0387 - Bobbie Awards - Suzie The Floozie, Princess Wei, Pantiara - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Suzie, Princess Wei R. Doe, Pantiara

Finally, they started giving out the awards…

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0390 - Bobbie Awards - Dr. Hal, Reverend Stang, Suzie The Floozie, Pantiara - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Bobbie Awards begin

Carolyn was awarded the “Goddess Of Mellowing The Harsh” Bobby Award, for her mellowing skills as demonstrated on day 2. She was called up pretty early, like the 2nd or third one.  Yay!

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0391 - Bobbie Awards - Carolyn receiving Goddess Of Mellowing The Harsh award - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Carolyn receiving Goddess Of Mellowing The Harsh award

They also had a dedicated video and picture cameras, to capture the awards:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0392 - Carolyn receiving Goddess Of Mellowing The Harsh award - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
official documentation of Carolyn’s award

20090705 - X-Day - Carolyn - getting Bobbie Award by Susie - 2814-Magic_Mist - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Carolyn showing off her award

And here’s what her award looked like:

20090705 - X-Day - Carolyn's Bobbie Award by Susie - 2786 - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Carolyn’s Bobbie Award

Ultimately, Carolyn’s award became an inspiration for SubGenius artist IMBJR to create “The Mellow”, who also created “The Xanatos Scream”. Here they are:

20100325 - Carolyn - The Mellow - by IMBJR from alt.slack
20100324 - Clint - 0 - The Xanatos Scream - by IMBJR from alt.slack [SubGenius]
^ This thing tiles really well. Check it out.

Clint got a double award, for “Earliest X-Day Casualty” and “Best Mud-Puddle Pass-Out”. Rob had nominated him.  Yay!

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0394 - Clint receiving Earliest X-Day Fatality + Best Mud-Puddle Passout award - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
receiving Earliest X-Day Fatality + Best Mud-Puddle Passout award

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0396 - Clint receiving Earliest X-Day Fatality + Best Mud-Puddle Passout award - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Getting official documentation pic

20090705 - X-Day - Clint - getting Bobbie Award by Pantiara - 2817-Xanatos - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Official documentation pic

Close-up of the award:

20090705 - X-Day - Clint's Bobbie Award by Pantiara - 2785-BobbieAward_by_Pantiar - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Quite appropriate

I was quite sunburned by this point… but didn’t really notice or care…. After all, THE WORLD ENDS TOMORROW AND YOU MAY DIE!

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0398 - Clint receiving Earliest X-Day Fatality + Best Mud-Puddle Passout award - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0399 - Clint receiving Earliest X-Day Fatality + Best Mud-Puddle Passout award - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Dildo Valerie and Bunny Day got their awards, as did many others:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0401 - Bunny Day, Dildo Valerie's Bobbie Awards, Brayneleeke (bg) - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Bunny Day, Dildo Valerie’s Bobbie Awards

Bunny Day and Dildo Valerie received Bobbie Awards along with Bust A Nutmeg for something like the “Best Rendition Of ‘For A Good Time, Call'”…

DECAMPMENT

We decided it was time to pack up our tent and such. We hadn’t slept in it since Day 1 anyway — we’d been sleeping in the car. And my god did it smell like a diseased swamp in there. Our tent was by a small patch of trees — maybe only 10 feet across. Yet it took us 2 years to notice the random stuff that was right there in front of behind us the whole time:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0402 - stuff behind our tent I almost didn't notice - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
stuff behind our tent I almost didn’t notice

Pagan things… orbs.. shiny stuff… yay..

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0403 - stuff behind our tent I almost didn't notice - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
stuff behind our tent I almost didn’t notice

Sirius Rising is a huge pagan festival at Brushwood, where some 1,000 people show up… But it costs way more money than X-Day…

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0404 - stuff behind our tent I almost didn't notice - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
stuff behind our tent I almost didn’t notice

This hair reminds me of the lost hair of 1,000 My little Ponies:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0405 - stuff behind our tent I almost didn't notice - hair - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
stuff behind our tent I almost didn’t notice – hair

All in all, I’m not sure how the hell I missed this stuff:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0406 - stuff behind our tent I almost didn't notice - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
stuff behind our tent I almost didn’t notice

The 3 days of hellish rain were long gone, and the mud tracks were now baked into the mud:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0407 - dried mud tracks - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
dried mud tracks

We said goodbye to Teeters, and took a picture of his Cous Cous to remind us to buy our own:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0408 - Teeters LeVerge - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Teeters LeVerge

Don’t forget:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0409 - Couscous - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Add a boullion cube. It's the only way!

POTLUCK

By the time all was said and done on Sunday, Carolyn was like “since it’s now so late, I’d rather just stay now.” But then we decided to go ahead and leave! We’d just get back in the middle of the night, rather than sleeping here one more day, waking up early, and getting back in the evening.

But then Carolyn was like “it’s already 5PM, and the potluck is going on, so we may as well stay for that!”

Free food rather than having to stop to eat. It makes sense. Plus there’s more variety. And WAYYYY better company. SLACK! It is the SubGenius way!

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0410 - potluck dinner - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
potluck dinner

The food was awesome.  Shitloads of pasta, incredible Indian food, haggis (yes, haggis! We actually tried it!), chips and artichoke salsa…  Olives with pits.  Carolyn tore those up, they were so delicious.  Clint thinks they should be eradicated from the earth.  They also had fried donuts that “were just donuts”, but that looked like seafood poppers.  If it was shrimp and scallops, Carolyn would have eaten them, but when she found out they were “just donuts” she passed.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0411 - potluck dinner - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
potluck dinner

We said our final goodbyes to the remaining SubGenii that were hanging around, both inside and outside. Contact infos were exchanged, yadda yadda. But the truth is, as long as you’re on Facebook, you’re going to be able to find everyone at X-Day. They’re pretty much all on there. And those that aren’t are on the alt.slack newsgroup, where they’ve been for decades…

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0412 - potluck dinner - outside - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
potluck dinner – outside

We just found out Rev. Spike’s glasses don’t attach to his ears! He custom-made piercing-based glasses! There’s no frame whatsoever, just lenses that attach to his piercings via magnet. That’s so friggin’ awesome. Piercings are mostly pointless — this one actually had a point.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0413 - Rev. Spike's self-made piercing-based glasses - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Rev. Spike’s self-made piercing-based glasses

DRIVING HOME

Finally, we left and went home.

It was sad, but they were still broadcasting on FM, so we got to at least listen to X-Day until we were out of FM radio range.

And then at that point, we popped in all the various free cds of SubGenius-created music that various people had given us.

Finally, after a good hour or 2, we had to go back to our music, which represented the final unplugging from X-Day. Now we were just in a car, with still 6 hours to go.

And you know what? WE SAW FIREWORKS! One thing about going to X-Day is, there aren’t really fireworks in New York. And SubGenii were banned from having explosive devices at X-Day many years ago–we’re troublemakers. And since X-Day is July 5th, not July 4th, a lot of the times you don’t even realize July 4th happened. I had only seen 3 fireworks explode in the past 2 4th of Julys.

So driving home at night was actually kind of awesome! You got to see the various towns setting off their fireworks. And you got to see it three-dimensionally, as you passed. I was lucky, as Carolyn had first driving shift, so I got to stare at them more. But Carolyn definitely did some drive-by staring of her own.

It took about 6 1/2 – 7 hours to get home, which is pretty good time.

We stopped in Breezewood again to top off the gas and pee and switch driving shifts.  We also stopped at Taco Bell and had some confusion with the order. This Taco Bell still served the long-since removed from the Taco Bell menu TOSTADAS. I love ’em! They’re light. Chips, beans, lettuce. A great item if you’re not quite full, but don’t want a full taco. And only 79 or 89 cents. They’re even vegetarian! We had a long conversation with the guy who worked at that Taco Bell. Basically, they will make any canceled item that they have the materials to make. I wish our Taco bells were so rebellious.

Finally, we got home around 1:30-2:00AM, Sunday Night. We left our remaining beers in the cooler outside, where they were (much more slowly) eventually drank.

COMA

Under normal road-trip scenarios, three days of misery might have made Event Generic-Event not worth it. But since this was not a Generic-Event, but a SubGenius X-Day, the awesomeness of it all totally outweighed the rain. Sure — it would have been better if it hadn’t rained as much — But anybody who knows us knows that we hate driving. And we still think it’s worth the 8 hour drive. And we’re going to do it again in 2010! In fact, by the time this posts, we will have just come back from X-Day 2010. So there!

To view all the pictures from day 5, go to my 20090705 tag on flickr. Read about day 4 here.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0384 - Rev. Panik's painting - Lord Cyclohexane, drunk naked girl @ yesterday's bonfire by you.

Hey Pastafarians? What does your church do for you do? Bwahahahaha, we had a great time because Church Of The SubGenius is a real organization, not just a page you “fan” on Facebook! IN YOUR FACE!  One more thing: 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

Read about day 3 here. Read about day 5 here. 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

As always, click through to comment on any picture individually on flickr, or to see the full-size…

We went to X-Day again this year. It was a totally different experience than last year. It rained for the first three days we were there, but then it got really nice for the weekend. It was never overbearingly hot.

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0305 - Wilhelm's Bob Dobbs painting - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Wilhelm’s Bob Dobbs painting

^ The “Bob” painting that stared over us, mocking us with his off-kilter eye!

Saturday was the pancakes and scrapple… A certain group of Subgenii that we haven’t really talked to much make these every year. Last year we did not realize how great it was to NOT MISS IT. This year, we actually went. They have this grill that’s so hot that they cook a pancake in about 10 seconds or so. They have gallons and gallons of batter, and basically feed everyone until the batter is gone.

They also serve scrapple!

Clint finally tried scrapple because Carolyn had the foresight to get him a piece while he was getting his pancake. Nobody was interested in Clint’s stovetop/campfire yardsale waffle-iron that he brought, though. They had things pretty streamlined.

They also had the “gang wars” event, which was mostly a few people with water pistols. But it really helped that Danger Unicorn was topless. What a ray of sunshine in an oppressive world!

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0307 - Dammit Janet, __, Stang, Brian, __, __, Danger Unicorn - boobs! - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Dammit Janet, Stang…Danger Unicorn boobs!

I forget why, but I had wandered to the other side of the campsite, to see the Norther Pavilion that I’d never really hung out at during the 2008 X-Day. Since my foot hurt from my plantar fasciitis, I actually drove across, even though it’s only 1000 feet away or so. I think people were making more food to mooch or something. I dunno. I kept hearing there was going to be a pinata. I didn’t want to miss the pinata. I think Carolyn was napping at this point or something. At some point we had the house salad and the quesadilla from the Blue Lady café run by Brushwood. They are damn generous with their portions.

Finally, the pinata happened. I got there just in time to see Dildo Valerie flashing everyone. Unfortunately for the general public, that link is to a video that only my face to face flickr friends can see. ;)

Only at a SubGenius event would someone think to have a pinata that is not full of candy… But is full of… BUGS! Crickets, to be specific.Hilarious when Dildo Valerie finally gets it open and says, “It’s like…bugs.”

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0313 - pinata crickets - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
they didn’t really move too much afterward

We also had some good ol’-fashioned preaching and ranting by SubGenius founder Ivan Stang:

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0314 - Rev. Ivan Stang - preaching - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Rev. Ivan Stang – preaching

Here’s a video excerpt:

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0317 - Rev. Ivan Stang - preaching - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

"When Ivan Stang talks.. People listen."

Sometimes, he looks downright angry. Then again, if you’re not angry, you’re probably not paying attention:

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0324 - Rev. Ivan Stang - preaching - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Get mad!! You’ll pay to know what you really think!

Quit your job for “Bob”! Praise not working! Overman? I’m over, maaaan. “You can’t put ME in a box?”, you say? Ladies and gentleman, we all end up in a box. Find your ShorDurPerSav… Because you have a short duration personal existence!

Saturday night is also when the most bands play. Special thanks to Dildo Valerie and Bunny Day for imparting upon me the ability to enjoy the show much more, thanks to some of their leftover intoxicants. Unfortunately I missed the crazy drunk girl dancing on stage until someone kind of shooed her off. But I did manage to download videos of that, before they were pulled from YouTube ;)

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0328 - Amino Acids - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Amino Acids

Video of Amino Acid craziness:

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0334 - Amino Acids craziness - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Amino Acids craziness

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0331 - Amino Acids - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
A fez is not an unusual sight around these parts

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0336 - Amino Acids playing - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Amino Acids hit their high note

I should mention that at some point, they played the Amino Acids movie. I’d seen the first couple parts at the Baltimore Devivals, but I had not seen the brand new part 3.

After the shows, we had the huge bonfire. Basically, I’ve never seen bonfires huger than this — but during Brushwood’s Starwood festival, they actually make bonfires too large to fit in the roundhouse. (The roundhouse is the wooden semi-structure that these bonfires take place in.)

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0339 - bonfire pit - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
bonfire pit

Of course, SubGenii don’t just do something. They do the hell out of it. And that includes lighting bonfires. Why be normal, when you can light it with a fucking blowtorch?

blowtorch bonfire lighting (3m19s)

A random YouTube’er, who obviously goes to Brushwood, informed me that the blowtorch has a name. “‘Tis The Dragon”, he commented.

At some point earlier during this X-Day — or maybe the last one — we had wandered around with hot dogs on our camping forks, looking for the path of maximum SLACK — that is, someone else’s fire. Dr. Legume ended up cooking our hotdogs with a blowtorch. Let me just say — hot dogs cooked via blowtorch are quite execllent!

Here’s the best picture of the bonfire. NOT by me; You need a $2600 camera to pull this off:

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0344 - bonfire - (by George Burgyan) - 585236688_aJJdV-X2 - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

bonfire (by George Burgyan)

The annual burning of the wooden Dobbsikon proceeded, as it always does. This time, a spinning, flaming piece did not break off and fly into a densely populated area of drunk onlookers. I was pretty amazed at their reaction time when that happened last year.

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0345 - Pantiara - by the bonfire pit - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Pantiara – by the bonfire pit

People danced in circles around the bonfire… Others watched:

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0347 - bonfire - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
bonfire

And that crazy drunk girl? She danced naked the entire time. As depicted in Rev. Panik’s painting that I photographed, which became as close to the official photo for this X-Day as any, as it was used as the header image for the official 12X-Day page:

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0384 - Rev. Panik's painting - Lord Cyclohexane, drunk naked girl @ yesterday's bonfire by you.

Who knows how the night ended? By the time the bonfire happens, things are usually pretty hazy. Last time, X-Day was a Saturday, so the bonfire was at the very very end. This time, X-Day is Sunday (tomorrow), so the bonfire was not the very end of our celebrations. But it did mark the last official major event.

Now we have to be up by 7:00AM tomorrow, as The Rupture is predicted to occur at 7AM, July 5th, 1998. The problem is — someone switched the calendars, and we don’t know when 1998 is. So we just have to keep trying every year, until the pleasure saucers come.

To view all the pictures of this set on flickr, go to my 20090704 tag on flickr.

Read about day 3 here. Read about day 5 here. 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

Read about day 2 here. 4 here. 5 here. 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

As always, click through to comment on any picture individually on flickr, or to see the full-size…

We went to X-Day again this year. It was a totally different experience than last year. It rained for the first three days we were there, but then it got really nice for the weekend. It was never overbearingly hot.

So, remember that story I talked about at the end of day 2? About Valerie losing her clothes and stealing Spike’s shirt and making a skirt out of it? Yeah, I guess that happened on day 3, not day 2. I’m not going to repeat it all again, but it was pretty funny how she lost her clothes.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0237 - Dildo Valerie - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Dildo Valerie with stolen shirt-skirt

Also at some point, not sure if it was Friday or Saturday, but there was a conversation about catheters.  Dildo Valerie said she had to change catheters for a living and that it’s not fun.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0238 - Tangent, Dildo Valerie, Carolyn, Rev. Spike - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

would YOU let her change your catheter?

At another point, someone was telling some story that involved bestiality. One of the people they were talking about had said something like, “You dog-fucking faggot.” To which I replied, “You can fuck a dog and have it not be gay.” This won the award for “funniest thing said in the last 5 minutes”. In fact, I was asked to re-create it on video. Said video appears to have been taken down, or I would have embedded it.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0239 - Agent Lloyd - I love ho mom - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Agent Lloyd loves ho mom

(Actually, the shirt says “hot moms”, but “ho mom” was even funnier.)

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0242 - Yuengling's almost lined up - (by Tangent) - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Yuengling‘s almost lined up (by Tangent)

Unfortunately, the other pic where they were lined up even better was too blurry to save. I guess you had to be there, to witness the magical merging of beer bottles.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0244 - Carolyn, Wilhelm's ''Bob'' painting (bg) - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Wilhelm’s ”Bob” painting

Wilhelm’s “Bob” painting stared at us, with his evil off-kilter eye… Mocking us, the entire time we were there.

A lot of excellent and unique conversation was had during the day. Indeed, that is a boon of hanging out with Subgenii: Not talking about [or thinking like] normal boring people. The Pinks. The Conspiracy. The Perpetrators Of False Slack. None of them are here. Tangent talks about how he used to be gay, but then realized that a woman can fuck you like a man, but a man can’t fuck you like a woman:


Johnny Dildoseed / I used to be gay

I admire Tangent’s candor.

Note the purple distortion typical of most recent consumer cameras, when dealing with high contrast situations. Nothing to do with snow.

We found the water shrine. Apparently we did a poor job of exploring last year, since it was right there:

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0245 - Water Shrine, maypole - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Water Shrine, maypole

After Brayneleeke’s “episode” the previous night, he apparently stayed up all night drumming with the pagans in the roundhouse. Everytime he would stop and/or fall asleep, some dude would say, “So, did you join the union yet?” And he would wake up and start drumming again. I believe his hands were sore the next day. (No protective layer of tears this time.) Finally, he was asked that, and he said, “NO!”, and left. Apparently, by leaving, he joined the union. No, not everything makes sense in Brushwood. Nor does everybody make sense.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0247 - Oreo eating contest - __, __, Dr. Legume - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

The giant Oreo-eating contest. Each contestant ate a single huge Oreo comprised of the white filling of over 100 Oreos. So good… That it’s fucking disgusting!

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0248-diptych-GEDC0251 - Oreo eating contest - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Really — is this sensible on any level?

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0255 - Oreo eating contest - The Hugest Oreo Ever - (by George Burgyan) - 585190935_3qLke-O - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
The Hugest Oreo Ever (by George Burgyan)

It still rained a lot, and was pretty damn muddy:

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0258 - tents, cars, mud - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
tents, cars, mud

During the un-costume ball, someone passed around communion wafers to put on our foreheads. Apparently, this is like really bad mojo for Catholics, haha. I later read news stories about people stealing the wafers from actual Catholic churches, and then receiving death threats. Ahhh, typical Christianity.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0261 - Carolyn, Clint - communion wafer foreheads - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
communion wafer foreheads – suck it, godboys – if there’s a hell, i’d rather be there than with anyone offended by this

At some point, Teeters was wearing a nametag with Ivan Stang’s real name.  He commented that Stang told him he was ruining his good name.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0262 - un-costume ball - Susie The Floozie, Pantiara, Popess McGani, Hercules, Teeters, Carter LeBlanc, Rev. Eggplant, Burger King - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Susie, Pantiara, McGani, Hercules, Teeters, Carter LeBlanc, Eggplant, Burger King

There was also the “Un-Costume Ball”.  Dildo Valerie and Bunny Day went as twins that gave birth to each other. Naked, with fake umbilical cords going from each of their vaginas to the other’s belly button. If you’re a friend of mine on flickr [which only applies to people I’m friends with in real life], you might want to check this picture out. It was not sanctioned for “the internet in general”.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0265 - un-costume ball - Christopher Lee, Burger King, Rev. Carter LeBlanc - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Christopher Lee, Burger King, Carter LeBlanc

Since Michael Jackson had just died, of course someone had to go as him! After all, aliens and X-Day go hand in hand. And MJ definitely isn’t human.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0266 - un-costume ball - __, Rev. Brayneleeke as Michael Jackson, Bust A Nut Meg - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Michael Jackson, Bust A Nut Meg

We heard a story about someone driving to X-Day, who noticed a hitchhiker/wanderer who didn’t even have a shirt on his back. So they gave him their “Bob” Dobbs shirt. The police later happened to drive by, and of couse couldn’t leave well enough alone and had to harass/talk to him. Because he had a SubGenius Dobbshead shirt on, they just assumed he was destined for Brushwood. So they dropped him off there. But the guy had no money. Brushwood gave him a sandwich and some soup, and sent him on his way. haha. Poor guy.

Dr. Agonfly actually DID hitchhike several thousand miles to get to X-Day.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0267-GEDC0268-GEDC0269 (triptych) - un-costume ball - Pantiara & her Dobbsicon crucified doll, Lord Cyclohexane eats it - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Pantiara & her Dobbsicon crucified doll

Alien masks are a common theme for Subgenius-related bands….

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0271 - John Deere Tractor Beam - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
John Deere Tractor Beam

Then I ran into these kids, with their matching Alternative Tentacles t-shirts! Totally kick-ass!! Of course they were also NoMeansNo fans! I think Carolyn & I were sleeping in the car [our tent broke on day 1, so we slept in the car after that. Surprisingly, I found it more comfortable than our own bed] when I heard NoMeansNo playing, and got out and wandered around until we found the source. It was them arriving. Then later they had the awesome matching shirts:

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0273 - Rev. Not The Messiah, Galaxina - awesome matching Alternative Tentacles shirts - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Rev. Not The Messiah, Galaxina – awesome matching Alternative Tentacles shirts

I didn’t get a piggyback ride ): Of course, I’m a lot heavier than Dildo Valerie.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0274-diptych-GEDC0275 - Dildo Valerie, Bunny Day, Popess McGani, Lord Cyclohexane, Agent Lloyd - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Valerie, Bunny Day, McGani, Cyclohexane, Lloyd

Lots of glowsticks were everywhere… but they don’t photograph very well.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0276 - Carolyn - glow stick sin hair - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Carolyn – glow sticks in hair

Then, we were introduced to the awesomeness of Phat Man Dee. She was rather amazing… Her jazzy songs are both comical and insanely unique. One was so creepy it gave me goosebumps. And she had the stage presence of a typical SubGenius:

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0279-diptych-GEDC0285 - Phat Man Dee - singing - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0281 - Phat Man Dee - singing - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Phat Man Dee – singing

Her husband (I think), Tomy Amoeba, introduced as “The lowest form of life”, also had a small part in her show. More video of Phat Man Dee below.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0289 - Tommy Amoeba interlude - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Tommy Amoeba interlude

808 and Christie arrived on Friday.  But we didn’t see them till like 8pm at the pavilion when the bands were playing.  We also didn’t see much of them on Saturday. They had already heard the stories about Clint’s first night here, though they didn’t know that Clint was the subject of them. My reputation preceeds me!

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0296 - Christie - glowstick cleavage - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Christie – glowstick cleavage

Oh, and Brushwood has some of its own cats too. I suppose technically they’d be considered feral, for having no home… But this cat was one of the sweetest cats we ever saw. You could jog 50 feet away, kneel down with your hand in “petting position”, and the cat would run up to be pet. We repeated this until we were tired from all the running.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0300-GEDC0302-GEDC0303-GEDC0299 - Carolyn - petting Brushwood kitty - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Brushwood kitty

Someone told us she had had kittens but they all found homes. Tangent & Dammit Janet might have gotten one of them. I also heard that this cat, or some other cat, was pregnant… But one of the SubGenii had paid to abort her litter. They had no homes, and nobody even had a place for the mother… So she had a feline abortion performed, to keep unwanted kittens from appearing. I wonder what the Catholics have to say about that

Then, Andrew The Impaled played.  There was a lot of excitement about this. Apparently people have fainted at previous performances. He has done things like literally sewn his lips shut. In our case, he nailed a nail into his nose:


Andrew The Impaled – nailing into nose

Then he nailed a screwdriver into his nose, and pretended to change radio stations with it. MAKE SURE TO WATCH THE LAST 10 SECONDS! HAHA

screwdriver impaled radio stations (2m22s)
Make sure to watch the last 10 seconds! HAHA

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0295 - Andrew The Impaled's blood - just kidding, it's jelly - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Andrew The Impaled‘s blood

Just kidding, it’s jelly. But when he was done with the screwdriver, he just so happened to throw it on the ground where this jelly was. It was quite disturbing. I did not realize it was actually edible :)

Back to Phat Man Dee — she did some awesome things, like a version of  the Star-Spangled Banner performed by inserting her hand into her mouth:


Star-Spangled Banner (Fist In Mouth Version) (slightly distorted)

I’ve also seen her do something similar on public access [viewed on YouTube], except it was Silent Night performed on Christmas.

She had some other neat songs too. Unfortunately, with the Canon camera broken, we could only record video with the GE camera, which heavily distorted the sound in any loud situations. However, it lets you take videos longer than 30 seconds, so you take the good with the bad. Wouldn’t you like to be a Pepe too?

Phat Man Dee – Pepe (somewhat distorted) (2m30s)

One of my favorite Phat Man Dee songs is the Ghandi Shake. Especially when Tommy Amoeba laid on the stage and started shaking.


Phat Man DeeGhandi Shake (somewhat distorted)

She also did War Pigs. She started it, aborted it, then decided, “What the hell”, and went on with doing it:


Phat Man Dee – War Pigs excerpt (somewhat distorted)

There was also the band that covered Miserlou and other songs Carolyn could recognize. That may have been John Deer Tractor Beam, as pictured above. Not sure. At this point, Rev. Spike was sitting outside in a pile of vomit in his lap.. With his phone in the middle of it.  Saturday, it was said that his phone was run over so hard that the battery had popped out — and yet it still worked. Vomit and car-attacks and all.

Carolyn checked on him but didn’t have the energy to do much else after two nights of taking care of Clint on night 1, and Brayneleeke on night 2. Haha. She did later win a Bobbie award for her efforts: “Goddess Of Mellowing The Harsh”.


Miserlou cover (somewhat distorted) (1m14s)

I had no idea the song Miserlou was 82 years old.

Here are some videos of the Oreo eating contest:

gigantic Oreo-eating contest (5m46s)

To view all the pictures of this set on flickr, go to my 20090703 tag on flickr.

Read about day 4 here. 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

We went to X-Day again this year. It was a totally different experience than last year. It rained for the first three days we were there, but then it got really nice for the weekend. It was never overbearingly hot.

Read about day 1 here. Day 3 here. 4 here. 5 here. 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

As always, click through to comment on any picture individually on flickr, or to see the full-size…

Quote Of The Day:

“Remember when you were dead?”
Dildo Valerie, talking about Clint’s alcohol-fueld antics (or lack thereof) from the previous night

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0203 - Lord Cyclohexane, Jim Jones, Zoot - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Lord Cyclohexane, Jim Jones, Zoot, at registration

We checked out the north pavilion on Thursday (and again on Friday).  Thursday there was supposed to be breakfast, but we took our time getting there, so there were only a couple of pieces of free bacon left.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0207 - Pantiara, Carolyn - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Pantiara, Carolyn, on rocks

On Thursday, Carolyn & Clint were looking for their chairs to take the pavilion.  They weren’t at the camp site, they weren’t in the car, and they weren’t at the pavilion.  Clint wondered if they had even been bought, but Carolyn saw him put them in the car, and she also would have noticed them on her final “did I forget anything?” Check. They had apparently been misplaced by drunkest-in-his-lifetime Clint.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0208 - shadow in the grass - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

"Dude... Aren't we all just... shadows in the grass?"

After hanging out at the pavilion, we got an awesome cheeeseburger and nachos [NOT free] from the Blue Lady café that Brushwood runs and opens randomly.  We got nachos with peppers and they didn’t chince on the peppers at all.  Literally every single bite of chip had a accompanying jalapeno pepper.  They were some of the awesomest nachos ever.

Funny thing about being separated from civilization – Little things are so much better. That’s one of the reasons camping is fun. But at Brushwood, there is still a semblance of civilzation: Showers, toilets, hot tubs, and the occasionally-open Blue Lady cafe. These things are very easy to appreciate!

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0209 - Carolyn - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Rock On? [groan] … Last sighting of Tangent?

Tangent and others had hung out at that shelter drinking beast ice and chilling before Clint had woken up. Because of Clint’s major alcohol intake [where’d that bottle of Lunazul tequila go? all gone!] the night before, he woke up about 5 hours past Carolyn.

Thus, by the time Clint was awake, Tangent was pretty smashed. This was still probably around noon time. Basically, everyone at X-Day is drinking 24 hours a day. We didn’t see Tangent again until the next day.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0210 - Jim Jones, Dobbsheads - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Jim Jones, Dobbsheads

After nachos, we wandered around a bit… then Clint said, “Check out those houses”, because there were these tiny cabins that had been built, and weren’t there last year. They were maybe 200 ft away. Carolyn looked, and was like, “Dude, those are our chairs!”

Clint had no recollection of ever being there… But we can only assume he drunkenly said, “Check out those houses!”, walked over there, and left our chairs there for some reason. We went over there [for what felt like the first time ever] and retrieved our chairs.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0211 - Dobbshead - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
metal/screen Dobbshead

Friday was supposed to be the slip n slide but everyone had eaten turkey and were pretty chill.  Carolyn took a nap at that point and left Clint. I have no idea why our journal for Thursday is talking about Friday, but I’m still going to cut and paste it into this blogpost :) Unfortunately, slip-n-slide never happened. But that’s okay. As a child, slip-n-slide made me bleed.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0212 - Bob Dobbs dummy - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Bob Dobbs dummy

Carolyn got up and hung out at Rob & Wilhelm’s shelter.  People would come and go, so Carolyn met Agent Lloyd, Spike Jones, Dildo Valerie, Kayte/Bunny Day, Wilhelm, along with also Two Beans, Rob/Teeters L’Verge, and Dr. Agonfly.

She thinks she spent 5 hours straight sitting at that shelter with everyone coming and going to use the Four Flushers.  It worked out because the people would come and go, and Carolyn just got to sit in one place socializing.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0213 - Dobbshead painting - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Dobbshead painting

When Clint woke up, we went to the main pavilion where the 2-hour Hour Of Slack happened.  I guess one of the bulldada auctions also happened, but we didn’t notice.

Then the couscous happened.  Teeters made couscous that was like manna from “Bob”. It was sooo good. Even when there were only remnants, people came and ate them out of the pan with their fingers. The secret? A goya chicken broth packet. MEAT MADE IT GOOD. Fancy that. (And suck it, vegans.)

After that, we made it a point to start stocking couscous AND boullion cubes in our house. Later, at Assateague, Clint learned that three boullion cubs is too many :)

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0215 - J.R. ''Bob'' Dobbs - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
J.R. ”Bob” Dobbs

Clint eventually showered. He doesn’t believe in cleaning up while camping, but after last night’s antics, laying in the mud during the rain, etc, it was necessary.

Carolyn chatted with Pisces who said that Orpheus Stain was also pretty drunk when she saw him and Clint. Yup! They both took out a bottle of tequila and many Budweisers in the space of an hour or 2.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0216 - Princess Wei (bg), Ivan Stang (bg), Carolyn, Earth shrine - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Princess Wei & Ivan Stang & Carolyn @ Earth shrine

When Carolyn looked at the camera, there were a couple of pictures that were taken during the blackout.  Pisces and Jim Jones? at the pavilion, and Orpheus dancing on a picnic table at the pavilion.  Good times, I guess. Heheh. (These were the last 2 pictures in the previous day’s post: Orpheus Stain dancing on the table, and Modemac & Pisces hanging out.)

Still… if our camera was killed by having left it in the rain — then how did we check those pictures out? Parts of the written journal just don’t add up!

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0217 - dead lighter shrine - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
dead lighter shrine – 2009 configuration

At some point during the day, I [Clint] finally met a lot of people who had “met” him the night before. He never did know for sure who the 5 people who carried him out of the road were. I also met Dildo Valerie.

While I love her to death, my initial impression was not good. People had told me she was adamant about shitting on me while I was passed out the day before, so all I saw was The Girl Who Wanted To Shit On Me. I wouldn’t put it past her; she’s does some crazy shit:

However, my opinion of her was very quickly raised by hanging out with her and Bunny Day. Dildo Valerie is awesome. They’re both awesome. Their blogs are awesome too. You should go read them all right now. I wish people that awesome lived in Virginia…. But then, Virginia Subgenius density has always been pretty low. I tried to save you all, but you wouldn’t let me!

Thursday night some people were indulging, and Eggplant and K-ren came looking for Brainleak at some point.  Later, Brainleak stumbled up in tears so Carolyn tried to be there for him.

“It isn’t medicine unless it makes you make sick-face when it goes down.”

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0218 - Dildo Valerie, Nutmeg - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Dildo Valerie, Nutmeg – dancing and unhappy that Michael Jackson was dead

Carolyn walked to the north pavilion to let Brayneleeke’s parents know we found him.  They were very cool about it, and said he was fine as long as he wasn’t passed out in a puddle [like Clint last night].

It took and hour and 15 minutes for Brainleak to come down from his vision of hell. It kind of bummed the rest of us out a bit, but that’s okay. All part of X-Day, and it’s not like Clint didn’t bum some people out last night! Brayneleeke was simply tonight’s casualty.

(Tomorrow it would be Spike Jones, who puked on his cell phone then let a car run over it. Like I said… a fatality every day! Haha.)

The best part? Brayneleeke suddenly deciding it’s a good idea to put his fingers on the glass of a propane lamp. Basically, right by the flames. We heard sizzling. Tangent looked at me and said, “I’ve never heard a human being sizzle like that.” It was quite disturbing.

I asked him about finger-blisters the next day. His answer? “Fortunately, my fingers were covered in a protective layer of tears.” I think that’s the most goth/emo/brutal thing I’ve ever heard.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0219 - Nutmeg, dancing - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Nutmeg dancing – Dildo Valerie was right, she could take a better pic of this than me

At some point, Susie The Floozy, Dr. Hal, and others sat behind us at our shelter. By this time, it was the black of night. It was occasionally raining, so once we plopped down in the shelter, we didn’t move, so as not to lose our seats..

I [Clint] didn’t see Dr. Hal, who was right behind me, for quite some time. He looked as trashed as the rest of us, as his medical condition means he can only drink liquor, not bear.

“How long have you been here?”, I asked.

He paused for a moment to consider his answer, then simply said, “Since conception.”

I rate this one of the best comeback of all time. Plus, it’s about the first time I ever got to talk to the revered Dr. Hal, after listening to him on the Hour Of Slack for so many years.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0223 - bathroom graffiti - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
bathroom graffiti

Thursday night, Rob/Teeters had grilled, and the grill was left out right by the shelter thing, so people kept tripping on it. It was dark and hard to see.  Rob/Teeters himself tripped on the grill 3-5 times.  It later became known as “The Grill Of Shame”. The worst part was a lot of cooked food ended up on the ground. In the end, a bunch of us passed around heated pitas, as all the actual food to put in the pita had wound up on the ground, courtesy of drunks tripping over The Grill Of Shame.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0226-diptych-GEDC0231 - Agent Lloyd, Teeters LeVerge - groping mannequin - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Agent Lloyd, Teeters LeVerge – groping mannequin

There was much talk about “let’s go fuck that mannequin”. Like, it came up MANY times. Finally, at the end of the night, after Carolyn went to sleep, they went to molest it, and Clint got some pictures.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0234 - Teeters teeters, Lloyd - mannequin - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
Teeters teeters

I can’t remember if this was the day Dildo Valerie lost her clothes while at the pool/hot tub. I mean, it’s not that she was shy about walking around naked — check my friends-only flickr pics from X-Day 2009 if you want to see what I’m talking about. (But you probably don’t have access, haha!). However, it’s pretty damn cold in Sherman, NY.

She basically stole random clothes.

Later, Rev. Spike Jones realized that she was wearing his shirt — as a skirt. She had totally stretched the neck out to her hip-size. And while she is a petite sex goddess, nobody’s hips are as small as their necks, unless you’ve been photoshopped. The shirt was in bad, bad condition. Haha. Spike Jones didn’t seem too happy about it, but he knew it was too late for complaining, and took it like a champ :)

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0235 - fire - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
fire

There was also The Prolapsed Stripper Rectum Story. There’s no real describing this. You just have to check it out yourself. But it has strippers, cocaine, and anal sex. Also, the Grill Of Shame is mentioned in the beginning, but not by name. Star Trek is also mentioned. The prolapsed stripper story in specific doesn’t start until about halfway through the video, which is really just a slice of random drunktalk:


Rectums. Remember: “You only get one!”

To view all the pictures of this set on flickr, go to my 20090702 tag on flickr.

Read about day 3 here. 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

Read about day 2 here. Day 3 here. 4 here. 5 here. 2008 (11X-Day) X-Day review here.

(more…)

CLEVELAND, Ohio: The Church of the SubGenius has announced that the end of the world will take place in precisely seven days, on Monday, July 5, 2010. In preparation for the fulfillment of this doomsday prophecy, the Church has issued a call to all of its members, to participate in a festival with rock concerts and blasphemous rituals taking place in upstate New York, during the final weekend before the arrival of the apocalypse.

The Church’s popularity has grown in recent years, much to the alarm of authorities. In 2010 the Church of the SubGenius arrived on Facebook, offending peace-loving conservatives but gathering over 1,500 members on its Facebook page in only a few days’ time.

The Church of the SubGenius is a popular organization often seen as a “parody” of religious cults, including Scientology, the Raelians, the Unification Church, and racist hate groups such as Christian Identity. The organization is widely seen as a satire that mocks organized religion, or as the church describes itself, “a cynisacreligion.”

Since its inception in 1953, Church founder J.R. “Bob” Dobbs has predicted that a fleet of flying saucers will arrive at the beginning of July to destroy the worldwide Conspiracy against the Church of the SubGenius, while all ordained SubGenius ministers will be rescued by escape vessels piloted by the Alien Sex Goddesses, also known as the Xists.

The Church is inviting all of its members worldwide to gather together for the final hours in Sherman, New York from Wednesday, June 30, 2010 to Monday, July 5, at a clothing-optional outdoor campground called Brushwood Folklore Center. The first gathering at this compound took place in 1996, and the event has increased in size and participants each following year. 1998 was designated the first true “X-Day,” and each successive year has added one to the total. This year’s celebration in 2010 is X-Day 13, or X-Day XIII.

The Church has been engaged in a massive recruitment campaign to increase the numbers of its membership before the arrival of the Xists. According to Church records, the organization currently has approximately 100,000 members worldwide. SubGenius recruitment has been especially dedicated among the ranks of people who refuse to conform to the norms of society, including disbelievers, blasphemers, pranksters, rebels, hackers, pornographers, geeks, and outcasts.

The Church is seeking underground bands, indie rockers, performance artists, and performers and producers from the adult entertainment industry, because sexual freedom has been an important part of Church doctrine from the start. X-Day will be a celebration of free expression, performance art, rock and roll, pornography, and adult entertainment; and certain parts of the event will be restricted to adults only. Only ordained ministers of the Church of the SubGenius are allowed at the event, but the Church is accepting memberships at its standard rate of $30 up until the final hours of July 4.

The Church of the SubGenius has been no stranger to controversy since its foundation, and the upcoming X-Day celebration promises to be no different. In the late 1980s, members of the Church were accused of spreading a virus in Macintosh computers known as the “Peace Virus.” Numerous articles have been written on the Church in such noteworthy publications as the New York Times, Washington Post, Wired Online, Boston Globe, U.S. News and World Report; and broadcast reports have been produced by CNN and NPR. In April 1999, officials of the city of Cambridge, Massachusetts shut down an official SubGenius Devival gathering in the belief that the Church was affiliated with the Trenchcoat Mafia (the organization blamed for the Columbine high school shootings), though authorities later realized the association was mistaken. In its January 1, 2000 issue, a Time magazine poll declared J.R. “Bob” Dobbs the biggest fraud of the 20th century.

The Church received additional media attention in 2006 when one of its high-ranking members, known in SubGenius circles as Reverend Mary Magdalen, became involved in a legal battle for custody of her son due to her membership in the Church. This case has been covered in such popular online sites as Boing Boing, Fark, and Wikinews (Wikipedia’s news reporting service).

When the mysterious group “ANONYMOUS” delcared war against the Church of Scientology in 2008, the Church of the SubGenius responded with a declaration of solidarity with the hackers on steroids…and an invitation to the legions of ANONYMOUS to join the Church in New York to prepare for X-Day.

Detailed information about X-Day can be found on the World Wide Web at the X-Day Web site:

http://www.modemac.com/x-day

The official home page of the Church of the SubGenius can be found at:

http://www.subgenius.com/

Official Facebook page for the Church of the SubGenius:

http://tinyurl.com/23f2dxy

X-Day XIII Facebook Page:

http://tinyurl.com/2a47pyj

Reverend Mary Magdalen’s custody case:

http://www.modemac.com/wiki/Reverend_Magdalen

Message to ANONYMOUS from the Church of the SubGenius:

Photographers, entertainers, production companies, radio broadcasters, and all media producers are encouraged to contact the Church at its Cleveland, Ohio headquarters at 1-216-320-9528.

Also check out The High Weirdness Project @ http://www.modemac.com (more…)

Here’s a repost of something Modemac posted on Facebook. This describes how I feel so accurately that I am reposting it as my own opinion, even though I didn’t write it..

20100324 - Clint - 0 - The Xanatos Scream - by IMBJR from alt.slack [SubGenius]

I am a Dobbist.

As a SubGenius, I occasionally find myself interacting with normal Pinks who have no idea what the hell a SubGenius is. As we know, most attempts to define our faith tend to attract outbursts along the lines of, “Oh, it’s a joke! Ha ha ha!” or “That’s not funny!” … But that doesn’t really satisfy the question of what the “spiritual tendencies” of a SubGenius are. For this reason, it’s not uncommon for most SubGenii to be tarred with the label, “you’re an atheist.”

B&B - SubGeniuses - Bob Bob Bob

SubGenius = Atheism? Not quite...

To many religious persons, atheism is the worst state of spirituality in existence – the absence of God. Atheists, on the other hand, revel in this state – they declare themselves to be free of the trappings of religion, even as they grumble and complain about the way that atheists are distrusted and discriminated against in spiritual circles.

Except, that doesn’t really describe my spiritual leanings.

20090705 - X-Day - GEDC0385 - Clint, Christopher Lee - a meeting of the shirts

A Meeting Of The Shirts.

I’ve been called an atheist by Scientologists, Christians, and even some pagans; but that’s not really accurate. Atheism as a statement of spirituality causes many people of all leanings (including non-religious) to leap to conclusions, some of which may be wildly inaccurate. Also, I consider hard-core in-your-face atheists who scream “there is no God!” in my face to be just as obnoxious, offensive, and stupid as theists who scream “you’re going to Hell!”

20090730 - Venn diagram of open-minded groups

Atheists not included.

For years I considered myself to be an agnostic, but upon reflection I’ve decided that agnosticism isn’t really a “choice” for me, either. [Clint’s note: The preceding sentence is not really how I feel, thought the rest of this post is.] Agnosticism tends to be a middle-of-the-road choice that lets one avoid making hard and solid decisions, and it can often be justified by such wishy-washy arguments as, “I’d like to believe in God, but I haven’t seen any real evidence to prove it. Show me some outstanding empirical evidence, and I’ll be a true believer in God.” Except, of course, that such evidence is not forthcoming; nor are we likely to see such evidence in the course of our lives – or, indeed, for the entire lifespan of the Universe, if scientific theory and discovery continues to move along the path it seems to be traversing.

So, if I don’t want to spend my life questioning the existence of God, yet I don’t deny God outright, then what paths are open to me?

20080704 - X-Day at Brushwood - 161-6116 - pavilion with Bob Dobbs banner

I suggest this path... Cool people in that tent/shelter.

Polytheism to me seems even more foolish than atheism, and I have no intention of picking up the hammer of Thor or the cross of Brigid at any time soon. Rather, upon reflection, I choose at this time to take on a name coined by Reverend Godfather (Reverend Magdalen’s Dad). He told me this at X-Day, and I liked the word; so now I am offering a definition of the term.

I am a Dobbist.

20080706 - X-Day - Versificators shirt - (by Scalpod) - 2656062825_33db550f2f_o

Put this in your pipe and smoke it.

If an atheist refuses or denies the existence of God; and an agnostic questions the existence of God; then a Dobbist MOCKS the existence of God.

20090703 - X-Day - GEDC0261 - Carolyn, Clint - communion wafer foreheads

Fuck you, Christian god.

This may be succinctly seen in the phrase that we first hear at the beginning of SubGenius Pamphlet #1:

“Jehovah is an ALIEN and STILL THREATENS THIS PLANET!”

Jesus Christ creates hate -- look how easy it is to make them spew hate - "MARIJUANA - What Would Jesus Smoke?" - Jesus used (not smoked) Cannabis, says the Hebrew University in Jerusalem, and many others

Jeeze & Chong.

When one considers all of the crimes, desecration, and foolish acts committed in the name of God over the course of history – or even some of them – one can see that God is indeed a threat to the peace and security of the world; even to the point where World War III might turn out to be a clash of religions between the East (Islam) and the West (Christianity).

postcard - religious satire - Muslim asses praying - b40c

Fuck you, Muslim god.

In the face of a God such as this one, I would rather look at the Universe as a strange and sick joke at our expense, put there especially for God’s amusement.

20090620 - Artomatic - GEDC0119 - Parthena - pope painting, thumbs up

Fuck you, child-rape-accessory Pope(s).

God may exist, but if he exists then he is certainly laughing at us. Therefore, as a Dobbist, I will look for that which is funny and sick in this world, and laugh right back at God. He deserves our mockery, and certainly not our respect.

20080702 - X-Day - 160-6020 - defiled pagan mini-shrine

Fuck you, Buddhist & Pagan gods.

One quote that might fit in with this sectarian view comes from Sam Harris (an outspoken atheist) in “The End of Faith:”

“We know enough at this moment to say that the God of Abraham is not only unworthy of the immensity of creation; he is unworthy even of man.”

20090704 - X-Day - GEDC0305 - Wilhelm's Bob Dobbs painting

Here's someone worthy of man. He could sell you a can of beans, and then sell you your farts afterward.

Why should we fall prostrate to an alien God from a corporate sin galaxy, when instead we can point at him and laugh at the fact that he has a small penis? (Considering the everlasting emphasis placed on sex in all of the major religions, it seems obvious that God must be compensating for something.)

postcard - 0 - possible BDSM club awkwardness - b42c3 (b&w)

God, why are you so obsessed with penises? FUCK OFF!

The Church of the SubGenius is built on humor, though over time it has naturally seen many Schizms – as we are commanded by J.R. “Bob” Dobbs to do. This is my Schizm: I am not a Holocaustal nor an Ivangelical, but rather a Dobbist. It may turn out to be Short Duration Personal Schizm, and perhaps on this coming X-Day, “Bob” may show me to be a complete idiot for writing these words.

Bring it on, “Bob!” I’m ready for you!

For now, and at this point in time, I am a Dobbist.

20090702 - X-Day - GEDC0213 - Dobbshead painting

(more…)

SPOILER ALERT – This contains some minor 24 spoilers. Reposted with permission of SubGenius Rev. Ramona BackItOnUp, who posted this on her Facebook, where the world cannot appreciate its awesomeness. Here we go:

Scene One

Jack Bauer: I sure am glad I’m retired from CTU! I never want to get stuck inside another nukular bomb again, that’s for sure. I just want to do some banking at Bank of America, because of their great customer service and low fees. Maybe I’ll spend some time with my daughter Kim, now that there are no national crises going on to endanger my family!

Tony Almeida: Not so fast, Jack. I have the explosives here in the microfilm. If you ever want to see your wife alive again, meet me in the parking lot of 7-11, home of the Big Gulp.

JB: Tony, you have a contract with 7-11 now?

TA: No, but I’m working on it. Mmmm, I love that coffee, made fresh every hour!

Chloe: Jack, I’m trying to upload the explosives to your PDA, but I can’t get the floor plan for the White House unless you get me a Snickers Bar. Snickers really satisfies!

JB: That’s fine, Chloe, but right now I need you to snap into a Slim Jim.

Renee: I’m Renee, and I’m relatively new to the show. Have I missed any calls from my Coldwell Banker?

TA: Renee, your head is shaped like a wedge. So was Jack’s wife’s. And the terrorist woman who had an affair with him. Their heads were as wedge-shaped as a slice of DiGiorno pizza. It’s not delivery – it’s DiGiorno.

All: (laughter)

Scene Two

JB: (On the phone) Kim, I realize I’ve been shooting heroin for an undetermined number of seasons, but you need to get on a plane out of California NOW. I can’t explain it, but I’m a Federal Agent, and I simply can not believe this is not butter.

Kim Bauer: No, Dad, you listen to ME. I’m built Ford tough and I’m not thinking different. I live here, and I have a family, and I’m busy drinking a Coors Light, which is the right beer now. I can’t uproot my life every time you call. You owe me an explanation!

JB: THE TERRORISTS ARE ON THE BOAT. STAY OFF THE CARNIVAL CRUISE. Kim, I repeat, Just Do It.

KB: Okay dad. I can hear you now.

JB: Good

Scene Three

Michelle Almeida: I can’t believe they killed me off in season four! Wait, what season are we up to now?

TA: What? I can’t hear you over this crunchy cereal I’m chewing. It has caused several humorous misunderstandings already so far.

JB: Won’t somebody please send me the schematics? I had to break a Russian’s fingers this morning and there’s still a nukular dirty bomb in the air shaft.

TA: That’s what he said.

All: (Laughter)

President David Palmer: We’re ALL in good hands now. Well, except that Russian.

23:57
23:58
23:59
24:00 (more…)

I saw someone else post a month-by-month list of their favorite pictures from the year. What a good idea! I shall jump on that bandwagon, too. So here are some of my favorite pictures of 2009, month by month, all from my flickr (but NOT all taken by me).

I’ll try to keep it to 2-5 pictures a month.

I also will be including New Year’s Eve (2008->2009 transition) as it’s own month, since I usually don’t get my pictures up in a timely fashion.

Click any picture to follow through to my flickr, where it will be explained in much more detail. Or hover over the picture for a [very] brief summary. (more…)

A whole hodgepodge of messed-up dreams. I think Susie The Fl00zy from Church Of The SubGenius offered me a blowjob in one of the dreams, as I run around Tackett’s Mill in Lake Ridge in my underwear looking for my lost clothes. It was very surreal. I also separately was going to pick something up at the store, but these pedestrians acted like idiots, I called them names, and then we got into verbal arguments despite the fact that me being in a car means I should have put distance between us too fast for an argument to happen. I also was arguing with Modemac from Church Of The SubGenius via messages written on soap and left in weird displays. And then there was the girl scouts meeting I accidentally attended while picking up a present for Carolyn at some store. The leader told me I had to pay $5 at the end of the meeting (which, inexplicably, also had boys present). One of the desks in the classroom had some Voivod-related graffiti, which I had taken a picture of with my camera, because I like the band Voivod. The girl scout leader, middle-aged and with glasses and curly hair, told me if I came back for a 2nd meeting she’d fuck me, but only if I paid my $5 dues for that meeting as well. I told Carolyn about this [in the dream] and we were both amused. Later, when at the store to return this diaper which malfunctioned (?!), I ran into Martin Luther King, Jr., and called him a piece of shit during an argument, but we were actually filming a Curb Your Enthusiasm-like improvisation show, so it wasn’t real. We both laughed afterward, commenting, “Only on Curb Your Enthusiasm could someone run into Martin Luther King, Jr., call him a piece of shit, and have it be funny.” Yeah… This is just about the strangest set of random circumstance that I’ve dreamed about in a long time.

20090709: Also, yesterday, I remembered having had a dream where blood came out of my penis. In real life, this inspired some horrifying tales which were told on facebook when I tweeted about it.

“Dreams… They’re the hurricanes that wash the soulfilth from the superdome of our nightminds.”
-Xavier:Renegade Angel (more…)

While at X-Day last summer, I had the opportunity to participate in “Ask Dr. Hal”, where people wrote down a question for Dr. Hal to answer. He is very good at giving 3-minute answers to 3-second questions. I cheated and slipped in a “two part question”, that was really 2 questions.

1) Why is the sky?
2)Why does The Conspiracy value cleanliness so much?

Awesomely, Dr. Hal managed to talk for six minutes to answer these 2 questions. Eventually, the Hour Of Slack radio show broadcast my answers. I extracted them and re-hosted them for my personal posterity. Now presenting: Dr. Hal Answers Clint’s 2 Questions:


20080703ish - X-Day at Brushwood - Hour Of Slack - Rev. Ivan Stang & Dr. Hal - (from SubGenius.com)

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 0 - 171-7138-diptych-171-7139 - Clint - fangs, SubGenius salute - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Clint w/candy fangs, then giving SubGenius salute

EIEIEIEIEIIEIE!

So yes — we went to another SubGenius event. The Baltimore Devival #2. This time, we actually got a friend to join us: Tabbitha! I’ve always considered her the most latent SubGenius out of all of my friends anyway. (I’d say John The Canadien too, but he’s already found “Bob”!)  I wore my psychedelic / optical illusion shirt, pimp hat, green sparkling smoking jacket, and camouflage pants. Almost wore a space-themed tie, but decided against it, despite the cold, by assuming the venue would be too hot for a tie to be comfortable, and too dark for space tie to be visible.

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7102 - refrigerator podium - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

refrigerator podium – to be used for preaching later

We got off to a late start due to generally being punk-ass slowpokes. Baltimore is a long way away; over an hour’s drive. And poor Tabbitha had to drive to our place in addition to that. Then there was the whole detour on the way back to pick up my car, but I’ll talk about that later. We managed to blaze in town just around the opening time, so technically we were 15 minutes or so late. There was one good sign pointing out that we were in the correct place: A huge projected Dobbshead, obscuring a woman’s health advertisement. It was a sign from “Bob”:

20081115 - SubGenius Baltimore Devival #2 - 0 - Yup, it's the right place - projected Dobbshead - (by RadioFreeMountairy@Flickr) - 3035653554_a96795d04d_o - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

projected Dobbshead (by flickr user RadioFreeMountairy)

The parking itself was really weird. You basically had to park in a lot that said you’d be towed if you parked there. But it was pretty much empty. And this seemed like a quiet neighborhood. Not a good neighborhood; but a quiet one. Not so busy that tow trucks were on the prowl.  And since Baltimore is a city full of douchebags (I got a ticket for not feeding a meter at 11:30PM on a Saturday fucking nite!), we weren’t sure if we could park there. We finally drove away, circled around, and came back a second time when we realized there was no where else to park.

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7103 - The Motor Morons - power tools band - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

The Motor Morons – a power tools band

Dammit Janet and Tangent were asking us — “Have you seen a power tools band before?” … I really was totally clueless when they asked that. I finally learned the meaning of “power tools band”, and it was quite literal. And the great thing is, since SubGeniuses hate rules… You could walk right into the sparks if you so chose. And that’s what I did (almost)… I eventually wound up right next to the “sparks girl”, where I could get a good vantage of the carnage. At one point, she lost her spark thingies (they flew forward from the force of the power tools), and pulled these aluminum squares from her pockets to spark up in an emergency!

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7108 - The Motor Morons - power tools band - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

The Motor Morons –  side view

Anyway, here’s some crappy (because my camera sucks) video of them playing:

(Yes, it’s 2 copies of the same video, one on flickr, one on youtube, just in case the other goes down.)

Anyway, beer was a consideration for us. The first Baltimore SubGenius Devival occurred in a church, which obviously did not have a liquor license. Tons of people were drinking (and thus huge lines for the bathrooms), but they all had the foresight to bring their own. Not wanting to repeat the mistakes of last year, we bought beer on the way — part of why we were late. We also enquired about the beer when we arrived. Princess Pisces was outside, and I asked her, and apparently it was a donation to get beer — like at Art-O-Matic. Except without fixed prices. (I always wondered how ArtOMatic could “cheat” this by “suggesting” a specific “donation”.)

And what is the most slackful donation to make? $1. This seemed to be fine with everyone. We drank a shitload for $1.

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7110 - Tabbitha & Carolyn - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Tabbitha & Carolyn

The place it was at – Load Of Fun – was a very strange warehousey kind of venue. Not much of it was properly maintained. There were 3 bathrooms, but one did not have a working sink:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7120 - The Worst Sink In All Of Scotland - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

The Worst Sink In All Of Scotland

There was a lot of graffiti in various places as well:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7123-diptych-171-7122 - Awesome blossom, All your fags are belong to us - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

charming

I of course decided to explore. There was no security in any form whatsoever, other than various locked doors upstairs. I managed to explore every nook and crannie that could be explored without picking a lock. And there was some neat stuff… like… Stairs?!?!?!?!:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7128 - stairs - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

yes, stairs

There was all kinds of weird things up there… Including a dilapidated cart that really did not look safe to move any amount of actual weight on….

Once I got 2 floors above the main level, things got even more sketchy. The light was pretty much just the city light that came through the windows. There was a long narrow hallway and things were in such bad condition that I walked slowly to ensure boards didn’t break beneath my feet. Eventually I wasdeposited me into this strange area with caged books. I found it very odd, as well as a seemingly accidental social commentary on free speech in America:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7134 - free thinking has a place in modern america - keep the children safe - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

free thinking has no place in modern america

keep the children safe

I also found a rogue “OH!”, this time not placed there by me:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7136 - OH - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

OH!

The various bands (Motor Morons, Fat Free, Amino Acids) played, with various preachers (Rev. Ivan Stang, Princess Pisces, Rev. Carter LeBlanc) preaching in between:

Stang speaks!

Eventually, Susie The Floozy passed out candy fangs. These were arguably cooler than the candy eyeballs we got last year:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7137 - Tabbitha - fangs, devil horns, Carolyn - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Tabbitha – fangs, \m/, Carolyn

We of course ran into several of the friends we made at X-Day, including 808 and Christie (with the Gashlycrumb Tinies tattoo). They may be at Assateague this year. The Asian chick in the background might be the subject of the “scrambled naked girl” artwork that I took back from this devival and put up on my wall. I’ll have to ask Reggie Zus.

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7140 - Carolyn, 808, Christie - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Carolyn, 808, Christie

Eventually, Tabbitha had to explore the 2nd floor as well, since 2 of the bathrooms were on the “1.5th floor” (kind of a half-floor between 1st and 2nd floor), and most SubGenii are way too fond of slack to go up an additional flight of stairs without konwing for sure there is a bathroom. Anyway, it wasn’t long before she found a sign to disobey:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7143 - Tabbitha licking high voltage - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Even latent SubGenii are possessed with an urge to break any and all rules.

Finally we went out for a smoke break in the alley behind the venue, and checked out some of the cool graffiti:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7145 - graffiti - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7146 - Tabbitha, graffiti - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

“There!”

It got cold, so we went back in and resumed watching the bands / preaching:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7154 - Carolyn - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

watching bands

Stang’s jacket reminded me of my own, only silver instead of green:

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7156 - Stang's shiny jacket - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Stang’s shiny smoking jacket

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7166 - Stang preaching - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Stang preaching

Carter LeBlanc preaching

The last band to play is always the Amino Acids. They pulled Carolyn and some other females onto the stage…

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7175 - Carolyn on stage with Amino Acids - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

20081115 - SubGenius Devival in Baltimore - 171-7178 - Carolyn & chicks on the stage with Amino Acids - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Yes, that’s a theramin.

20081115 - SubGenius Baltimore Devival #2 - Carolyn - up on stage - Amino Acids - (by RadioFreeMountairy@Flickr) - 3034821153_31a1bbd26b_o - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

(some stage pics by flickr user RadioFreeMountairy.)

20081115 - SubGenius Baltimore Devival #2 - Carolyn - up on stage - Amino Acids - (by RadioFreeMountairy@Flickr) - 3034821453_58d7d9f6d7_o - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

20081115 - SubGenius Baltimore Devival #2 - Carolyn - up on stage - Amino Acids - (by RadioFreeMountairy@Flickr) - 3035657998_ca88f8a236_o - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

20081115 - SubGenius Baltimore Devival #2 - Stang - preaching - (by RadioFreeMountairy@Flickr) - 3035654482_4687264919_o - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

Stang – preaching (by flickr user RadioFreeMountairy.)

And of course… There was this guy. Note the bubbles. I didn’t take it, but this is a VERY strange picture:

20081115 - SubGenius Baltimore Devival #2 - Stang - preaching, weird guy, bubbles - (by RadioFreeMountairy@Flickr) - 3035653342_f9f304c5de_o - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR

weird guy, bubbles

(by flickr user RadioFreeMountairy.)

Anyway… A good time was had by all. We got to experience preaching, music, intoxication, unique people, as well as reconnecting with some of the cool people we had met at X-Day this year. Plus, Reggie Zus let me take home a piece of art that he had on display there. He said he printed it for free at school, so why not give it away for free? I don’t have a proper picture of it, but you can see it in the top of this picture, behind our cats playing with bubbles:

20081120 - Cats Vs. bubbles - 172-7230 - Lemonjello, Oranjello - on couch - diptych - 172-7228

ANYWAY…. WE SHALL RETURN NEXT YEAR!

PRIASE “BOB”!

OFFICIAL PICTURES & VIDEO FROM DEVIVAL: www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/Baltimore_2008/

FULL DEVIVAL AUDIO: www.radio4all.net/index.php/series/Church+of+the+SubGeniu…

To view all my pictures (basically the same pictures as this posting) on flickr (in case you want to individually comment), go to my SubGeniusDevival20081115 tag on flickr.

(and yes, this write-up is several months late)

(more…)

Yes, Carolyn & I will be there. The Canadian wants to go, but has trouble committing to things. Tabbitha should be coming with us as well, as our most-likely-latent-SubGenius-out-of-everyone-we-know friend. Anyone else is welcome. If you want to see preaching, bands, and generally have a chilled out time (last time they had chairs everywhere, and we lounged in a very low-energy way), come. Not high-energy (other than when the Amino Acids play), but definitely high uniqueness.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. 1-216-320-9528 / Fax: (216) 320-9528 / stang@subgenius.com / baltimoredevival@gmail.com

BALTIMORE, Maryland: The Church of the SubGenius is coming to Baltimore on Saturday, November 15th. Psychic predictions for the event have revealed the city will never be the same.

Members of the controversial cult will be gathering for a religious Devival designed to promote the cause of Slack, Abnormality, and the Word of Church founder J.R. “Bob” Dobbs. SubGenius Devivals are spiritual events unlike any other, and audience attendance is expected to reach capacity crowds.

Planned stage events at the Devival include religious preaching and rock music by scheduled performers. Attendees at the event include Reverend Ivan Stang, Rev. Susie the Floozy (of WREK Radio and “Bob’s” Slacktime Funhouse), Reverend Carter LeBlanc, and Priestess Pisces. Bands and performers will include The Amino Acids, Fat Free, The Motor Morons and The Versificators. With a special video surprise presentation as well.

Admission is $8 per person. Doors open for the Devival at 8:00 PM.

The event takes place at Load of Fun, a community-based gallery and venue for emerging and established artists in a variety of media located at 120 W. North Avenue, Baltimore MD. [It reminds me of the type of place Artomatic would be thrown.]

Detailed information about the upcoming Devival can be found on at the official SubGenius Web site: http://www.subgenius.com/newdevivals.html

As well as on the Load of Fun website: http://www.loadoffun.net/Calendar.html

The official home page of the Church of the SubGenius can be found at: http://www.subgenius.com

Photographers, entertainers, production companies, radio broadcasters, and all media producers are encouraged to contact Rev. Ivan Stang at the Church’s Cleveland, Ohio headquarters at 1-216-320-9528. (more…)

My Parody Religion Is Better Than Your Parody Religion … or: How I Survived X-Day XI [2008]
Days Four and Five

DAY FOUR: X-DAY

OH SHIT!! WE MISSED THE END OF THE WORLD!!! Attending The Rupture is sort of the point of going to X-Day! And it happens at 7AM on 7/5/1998. (But when is 1998? Obviously our current calendars are wrong.) And we didn’t get up until past 9… DAMN! (more…)

My Parody Religion Is Better Than Your Parody Religion … or: How I Survived X-Day XI [2008]
Day Three

20080704 - X-Day at Brushwood - SubGenius salute - (by Scalpod) - 2656035869_e7a34b77b6_o - please click through to leave a comment on FlickR
SubGenius
salute (by Scalpod)

EIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIE. This is the SubGenius salute! Remember it! (more…)

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