Media


VIDEO: MOVIE: REVIEW;Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013)

Clint: 5/5 stars, 9/10.
Carolyn: 5/5 stars, 9/10.
Native ratings: 3.3/5 stars Netflix, 6.7/10 IMDB.

Carolyn’s thoughts:  The franchise is still hilarious.  This was funny all the way through.  It had some commentary on the state of the media also.

Clint: Yes, it’s quite strange that such an absurd franchise can have such poignant commentary on the state of mainstream media. Seriously: There is no fucking point to watching news on the TV nowadays. You may as well be watching Will Ferrell, for all the relevancy of what they talk about. They find a story to distract people, then replay it over and over and over. Watching TV news now actually makes you less informed. And it’s sad that a ridiculous franchise like this actually has a point to make.

Anyway… This was hilarious, as expected.

 

Directed by Adam McKay (Step Brothers, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, Anchorman 1 and Wake Up Ron Burgundy).
Written by Will Ferrell (Step Brothers, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, Anchorman 1 and Wake Up Ron Burgundy) & Adam McKay (Step Brothers, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, Saturday Night Live, Anchorman 1 and Wake Up Ron Burgundy).

Will Ferrell as Ron Burgundy.
Steve Carell as Brick Tamland.
Paul Rudd as Brian Fantana.
David Koechner (The Office, 4 episodes of the 2011 Beavis & Butt-head, 12 episodes of American Dad, Final Destination 5, Sex Drive, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, Thank You For Smoking, The 40 Year Old Virgin, The Dukes Of Hazzard, Small Apartments) as Champ Kind.
Christina Applegate as Veronica Corningstone.
Dylan Baker (Fido, Dr. Curt Connors in the recent Spider-Man movies, Solondz’s Happiness, The Cell, Kinsey, Requiem For A Dream, Planes,Trains & Automobiles) as Freddie Shapp.
Meagan Good (Don Jon, Saw 5) as Linda Jackson.
James Marsden (Anchorman: The Legend Continues, Small Apartments, the son in Robot & Frank, Sex Drive, Cyclops in the X-Men movies, Death At A Funeral (2010), Sex Drive) as Jack Lime.
Greg Kinnear as Gary.
Kristen Wiig (Young Lucille Bluth in Arrested Development, Date Night, Adventureland, Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Knocked Up, The Brothers Solomon, How To Train Your Dragon, Saturday Night Live, Despicable Me, Girl Most Likely, 2 eps of The Simpsons, 1 ep of Drunk History) as Chani Lastname.
Fred Willard as Ed Harken.
Chris Parnell (Cyril in Archer, Rick & Morty, Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, The Dictator, Turbo, Saturday Night Live, 3 eps of Gravity Falls, 2 eps of The Problem Solverz, 2 eps of Drunk History) as Garth.
Harrison Ford as Mack Tannen, Veronica’s boss.
June Diane Raphael as (NTSF:SD:SUV::, Anchorman 2, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Year One, Girl Most Likely, Ass Backwards, 3 eps of American Dad, 1 ep of Drunk History) Chani’s Boss
Kirsten Dunst as El Trousias Maiden of the Clouds.
Jim Carrey as CBC News Anchor (uncredited).
Tina Fey as Entertainment Tonight Reporter (uncredited).
Amy Poehler as Entertainment Tonight Reporter (uncredited).
John C. Reilly as The Ghost of Stonewall Jackson (uncredited).
Lori Beth Sikes as Tina (uncredited).
Matthew Stanton as Skinny Guy (uncredited).
Vince Vaughn as Wes Mantooth (uncredited).
Kanye West as MTV Host (uncredited).

 

 

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1229340/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: A Case Of You (2013)

Clio: 3.4/5 stars, 7.4/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 7/10.
Native ratings: 2.7/5 stars Netflix, 5.6/10 IMDB.

It’s like one of those NBC episodes where someone invents a lie, and then just digs himself into a deeper and deeper hole with it. Plots based on lies annoy me, but then, they are realistic, and it is reality itself that is the true source of annoyance.

So anyway… This is a movie about a shy guy finally trying to get the girl — by stalking her facebook page and trying to become HER ideal man. The ultimate poser. You can imagine how such a lie would get you into bad situations.

And it all happens.

They also have a slight meta-angle, whree the main character is writing a book based on his experiences in the movie. I felt like they could have done more with this, and it was perhaps a bit forced… But I’m still glad they did it. It at least gave a chance for Vince Vaughn to exist.

And then… The movie got super-romantic at the end. I’m kind of surprised it turned out the way it did.

Carolyn’s thoughts:  This wasn’t that special, but it was a nice story.  There were some funny moments.  Peter Dinklage was hilarious.  I totally didn’t recognize Brendan Fraser as Birdie’s ex-boyfriend.  It was cute.  It definitely had that NBC “relies on lies” feel.
Directed by Kat Coiro.
Written by Justin Long, Keir O’Donnell & Christian Long (Justin’s brother).

Starring:
Justin Long (Unsupervised, Youth In Revolt, Funny People, Zack And Miri Make A Porno, Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story) as Sam.
Evan Rachel Wood (S1m0ne, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Birdie.
Peter Dinklage (Nip/Tuck, both Death At A Funeral movies, Elf, Game Of Thrones, will be in X-Men: Days Of Future Past) as Gerard, the hilariously-weird barista.
Vince Vaughn as Alan, the annoying publicist.
Co-Writer Keir O’Donnell (Miss Nobody, Wedding Crashers) as Eliot, the roommate.
Busy Philipps (White Chicks, The Smokers, He’s Just Not That Into You, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, 2 eps of Undeclared, 1 ep of Arrested Development, 1 ep of American Dad) as Ashley, the roommate’s girlfriend.
Jenn Harris (Better Living Through Chemistry) as Jackie, Birdie’s improv friend.
Sam Rockwell (Zaphod Beeblebrox in The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy (2005), Iron Man 2, Galaxy Quest, Seven Psychopaths, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1, Better Living Through Chemistry, Heist) as Gary. Was he the publicist’s partner?
Brendan Fraser (The Mummy movies, Journey To The Center Of The Earth, Bedazzled, 2 eps of King Of The Hill) as Tony, Birdie’s ex-boyfriend. Seriously? We didn’t recognize him.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1817081/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Better Living Through Chemistry (2014)

Clio: 3/5 stars, 7/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 7/10.
Native ratings: 3.1/5 stars Netflix, 6.3/10 IMDB.

Clio’s thoughts:  Not quite the outright comedy I’d hoped, but definitely funny, fucked up, drug-fueled, romantic, and with some nice eye candy (Olivia Wilde). The movie is a delayed coming-of-age story for adults in the “arrested development” of being trapped in a bad life, and needing to grow out of it.

Fucked up situations all around, with drug-use ultimately driving the comedy AND the plot. And the plot drove the character development by forcing the character to grow.

For a movie that is basically “romantic comedy plus drugs”, this actually fared pretty well, and had lots of interesting aspects. No regrets watching this, even if it wasn’t great. The cast (Sam Rockwell, Olivia Wilde, Michelle Monaghan, Ray Liotta) helped make this good.  This is a really good first movie from a first-time director and writer.

Carolyn’s thoughts: This was pretty quirky.  It wasn’t as funny as we were hoping, but it was enjoyable.  It really shows how life can get out of control pretty fast.

Written & directed by Geoff Moore & David Posamentier.

Sam Rockwell (Zaphod Beeblebrox in The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy (2005), Iron Man 2, Galaxy Quest, Seven Psychopaths, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1, A Case Of You, Heist) as Doug Varney.
Olivia Wilde (Tron 2, The Incredible Burt Wonderstone, The Change-Up, Drinking Buddies, Year One, 1 ep of Tron: Uprising, 1 ep of Portlandia, 1 ep of American Dad) as Elizabeth Roberts.
Michelle Monaghan (Justice League: War, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, The Bourne Supremacy, Constantine, Mission Impossible 3, 1 ep of American Dad) as Kara Varney.
Jane Fonda as Jane Fonda.
Ray Liotta (Observe & Report, The Details, Youth In Revolt, Hannibal, Good Fellas, La Linea, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of NTSF:SD:SUV::) as Jack Roberts.
Norbert Leo Butz (Dan In Real Life) as Agent Andrew Carp.
Ben Schwartz (Mystery Team, 3 eps of Starveillance, 2 eps of Bob’s Burgers, 1 ep of Robot Chicken, 1 ep of Arrested Development, 1 ep of Tron: Uprising) as Noah.
Ken Howard (A.C.O.D., 13 eps of Dynasty, 2 eps of Curb Your Enthusiasm, 1 ep of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Office) as Walter Bishop.
Jenn Harris (A Case Of You) as Janet.
Harrison Holzer as Ethan Varney.
Peter Jacobson (Transformers movie, 2 eps of Hope & Faith) as Dr. Roth.
Sonnie Brown (Don Jon) as Principal Song-Carmichael.
Ken Arnold (Men In Black 3, uncredited in Cecil B. DeMented) as Ed.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1609479/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Big Man On Campus (1989)

Clio: 3.4/5 stars, 7.4/10.
Carolyn: 3.4/5 stars, 7.4/10.
Native ratings:  6.0/10 IMDB. Doesn’t seem to exist on Netflix, which is weird.

I thought it’d be funnier… But it *was* funny.

Wait… Leading-lady Cathy was Jan (Melora Hardin) from The Office?  WTF?!? I totally didn’t recognize her! She’s all soft and curly and young instead of hard and stark and mature. I think I prefer her mature…More unique.

Carolyn:  I also thought it would be funnier, but it did have its laugh-out-loud moments.  It was entertaining enough, but all the positive reviews on IMDB made me have higher expectations.  It had a 6.0 rating on IMDB, which is pretty high for a comedy.

Clio: Yes. A native 6.0 is a bit misleading. That would generally map to an 8.4-9.6/10 given our personal rating distribution. Instead this was only a 7.4.  However, we knew going in that this would be a gimmicky 80’s comedy, which often means dated and lacking a modern edge.  So while the IMDB seemed misleadingly high, it still surpassed our expectations despite not being THAT great.

Worth seeing. Nice that the Hunchback Of Notre Dame can be done as a comedy…

Directed by Jeremy Kagan (The Journey Of Natty Gann, 1 ep of Ally McBeal).
Written by Allan Katz (6 eps of Rhoda, 4 eps of Blossom, 2 eps of M.A.S.H., 1 ep of Roseanne).

Allan Katz (this is the only thing he’s starred in, except for a movie that is in post-production dated 2013 that he is writing,starring, and directing) as Bob Maloogaloogaloogaloogalooga (Hunchback).
Corey Parker (How I Got Into College, Friday The 13th 5, 5 eps of Will & Grace, 1 ep of Duckman) as Alex. He’s like a Paul Reiser-wannabe in a Mathew Broderick-wannabe body. Not a good combo.
Melora Hardin (Jan in The Office???!?!?!?!?!? totally didn’t recognize her!, 17 Again, Thank You For Smoking, 2 eps of Quantum Leap, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Friends, 1 ep of Lois & Clark) as Cathy.
Cindy Williams (Shirley in Laverne & Shirley?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?, Steel Magnolias, 1 ep of Lois & Clark, 1 ep of Hope & Gloria) as Diane Girard, the female psychologist.
Gerrit Graham (Franklin Sherman in The Critic, Police Academy 6, 6 eps of Parker Lewis Can’t Lose, 4 eps of Gargoyles, 1 ep of The Tick-TAS) as Stanley Hoyle.
Jessica Harper (Minority Report, 19 eps of It’s Gary Shandling’s Show) as Dr. Fisk, the evil psychologist.
Tom Skerritt (Alien, Top Gun, Picket Fences, Poltergeist 3) as Dr. Webster.
John Finnegan (Mars Attacks!, Last Action Hero, Vegas Vacation, JFK, An American Tale) as Judge Ferguson.
Bill Morey (18 eps of G.I. Joe, 11 eps of Dallas, 2 eps of Mork & Mindy, 1 ep of Working, 1 ep of Full House, 1 ep of Designing Women) as Dean Crawford.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096925/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: A.C.O.D. (2013) [“adult child of divorce”]

Clio: 4.6/5 stars, 8.3/10.
Carolyn: 4.6/5 stars, 8/10.
Native ratings: 2.9/5 stars Netflix, 5.7/10 IMDB.

Carolyn: This turned out to be better than we were expecting.  I thought the premise sounded like it could be entertaining, and I wasn’t disappointed.

Clio: Indeed… I was resisting this movie quite a bit, as I’m so fucking sick of other peoples’ divorces. I was sick of it when I was a fucking kid, and I’m more sick of it now, as now I get to deal with others’ drama directly. So I figured it wouldn’t be as funny as I’d hoped because of that. I also figured that since Carolyn & I have been together for decades, as has/had our parents… That some of this simply might not resonate through me due to a lack of personal experience.  I also figured that since it was all about families… Well, I’m not really much of a family guy, and families in movies can be annoying.

I’m pleased to report I was wrong on all counts. This took awkwardness to an enjoyable level. People dug themselves into holes; deeper and deeper. Adam Scott’s face makes my fist want to hit it repeatedly, and it didn’t ruin the movie. His fucking, scrunched-up trollface didn’t ruin the movie. It worked for portraying a neurotic child of divorce. Who had a book written about him. A best-selling book. Yea… This movie really deals with repressed childhood anger, and that indeed resonated with me.

But most of all? I laughed a lot, which was the purpose for watching a comedy movie. Yay. The end.

Directed by Stu Zicherman.
Written by Ben Karlin (4 eps of Space Ghost Coast To Coast, The Daily Show) & Stu Zicherman (Elektra).

Adam Scott (Step Brothers, Knocked Up, Parks And Recreation, 2 eps of Six Feet Under, 1 ep of Robot Chicken, 1 ep of Childrens Hospital, 1 ep of NTSF:SD:SUV::, 1 ep of Drunk History) as Carter.
Richard Jenkins (the dead dad from Six Feet Under, Fun With Dick And Jane, The Cabin In The Woods, Let Me In, The Broken, How I Got Into College, Wolf, Me,Myself & Irene, Step Brothers, Turbo, Stealing Home) as Hugh.
Catherine O’Hara (The Nightmare Before Christmas, Home Alone movies, Frankenweenie, Where The Wild Things Are, Lemony Snicket’s A Series Of Unfortunate Events, Dick Tracy, SCTV, 4 eps of Six Feet Under, 1 ep of Curb Your Enthusiasm) as Melissa.
Amy Poehler (Blades Of Glory, Shrek 3, Mean Girls, Wet Hot American Summer, Saturday Night Live, Horton Hears A Who!, Parks And Recreation, Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo, 5 eps of Arrested Development, 3 eps of Undeclared, 2 eps of Wonder Showzen, 2 eps of The Simpsons, 1 ep of Napoleon Dynamite-TAS) as Sondra.
Mary Elizabeth Winstead (Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World, Death Proof, Grindhouse, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Smashed, Final Destination 3) as Lauren.
Clark Duke (Hot Tub Time Machine movies, Kick-Ass movies, The Croods, Superbad, 19 eps of The Office, 5 eps of Robot Chicken, 1 ep of Childrens Hospital) as Trey.
Ken Howard (13 eps of Dynasty, 2 eps of Curb Your Enthusiasm, 1 ep of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Office) as Gary.
Valerie Tian (Percy Jackson 1, Jennifer’s Body, Fantastic 4: Rise Of The Silver Surfer, Juno) as Kieko.
Sarah Burns (I Love You Man, 8 eps of Drunk History) as Margo.
Jessica Alba (Dark Angel, Machete movies, Fantastic Four movies, The Ten, Idle Hands, Little Fockers, 1 ep of The Office) as Michelle.
Jane Lynch (Afternoon Delight, Wreck-It Ralph, The Three Stooges, Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Glee, Shrek Forever After, 15 eps of The L Word, 3 eps of Neighbors From Hell, 2 eps of Arrested Development, 2 eps of Father Of The Pride, 2 eps of The Cleveland Show, 1 ep of The Spectacular Spider-Man, 1 ep of The Simpsons, 1 ep of News Radio) as Dr. Judith.
Jamie Renell (The Change-Up) as Tyler.
Vickie Eng (The Change-Up) as Mrs. Kobayashi.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1311060/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES/COMICS: REVIEW: R.I.P.D. (2013)

Clio: 5/5 stars, 8.6/10.
Carolyn: 5/5 stars, 9/10.
Native ratings: 3.2/5 stars Netflix, 5.6/10 IMDB.

Mike Judge was a voice? Weird.

Anyway, this was Men In Black, but with Ghosts instead of Aliens.  That REALLY sums it up. COMPLETELY. NOT MUCH MORE NEEDS TO BE SAID.  Every aspect of the MIB forumula was used here. Same formula, different values.

And it’s a good formula. We love it. We’ve watched all 4 movies, and all 65 episodes of the animated series — which was awesome, and went right under most peoples’ radar.

So given that we like this formula, we obviously found it VERY entertaining. This was a fun movie, and 3-D made it more fun. The cast was great. The special effects were great. There was comedy, action, a plot. The characters were interesting.

So, while seeming quite derivative, this was sitll a win.

Based on a comic, which is popular nowadays. (Was MIB a comic? Was the comic inspired by MIB?)

Directed by Robert Schwentke (Red, The Time Traveler’s Wife).
Written by Phil Hay (Aeon Flux, Clash Of The Titans (2010)), Matt Manfredi (Aeon Flux, Clash Of The Titans (2010)) & David Dobkin (Jack The Giant Slayer).

Starring
Jeff Bridges (The Big Lebowski, the original Tron movie and the new Tron movies, The Men Who Stare At Goats, Iron Man, How To Lose Friends & Alienate People, Tideland) as Roy.
Ryan Reynolds (Adventureland, Hal Jordan in Green Lantern, Wade Wilson in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Van Wilder, The Proposal, The Change-Up, Turbo, The Croods, Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle, The Amityville Horror, Waiting) as Nick.
Kevin Bacon as Hayes.
Mary-Louise Parker (Nancy Botwin from Weeds, Red movies, The Spiderwick Chronicles, Fried Green Tomatoes) as Proctor.
Stephanie Szostak (Iron Man 3, Dinner For Schmucks, 1 ep of The Sopranos) as Julia.
James Hong (Mr. Ping in the Kung Fu Panda movies, Jackie Chan Adventures, Hot To Trot, 2 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 2 eps of Archer, 2 eps of Bonanza, 1 ep of Home Improvement) as Nick’s Avatar.
Marisa Miller as Roy’s Avatar.
Robert Knepper (Percy Jackson 2, Transporter 3, Carnivale) as Stanley Nawicki.
Mike O’Malley (Deep Impact, 28 Days, 43 eps of Glee, 3 eps of Baby Blues, 1 ep of Axe Cop) as Elliot.
Devin Ratray (Side Effects, Home Alone 2) as Pulaski.
Larry Joe Campbell (Pacific Rim, 5 eps of Weeds, 1 ep of Friends) as Officer Murphy.
Piper Mackenzie Harris (1 ep of Newsreaders) as Nick’s New Avatar.
Toby Huss (Kahn Souphanousinphone, Sr. in King Of The Hill, Carnivale, Bad Milo, Bedazzled, 4 eps of The Venture Bros., 4 eps of Harvey Birdman, 2 eps of Beavis & Butt-head (2011), 1 ep of NTSF:SD:SUV, 1 ep of Childrens Hospital, 1 ep of Adventure Time, 2 eps of Kung Fu Panda, 1 ep of Brickleberry) as Various Deado (voice).

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0790736/combined

I'd rather be watching TV![IMDB link]

RATINGS:
Clio: Netflix: 3/5 stars. IMDB: 7/10.
Carolyn: Netflix: 3/5 stars. IMDB: 7/10.
The native public rating for this movie is: Netflix: 2.9/5 stars, IMDB: 3.1/10.

CLIO’S THOUGHTS: I don’t know if it’s the long break we took in between 1-6 and 7, but I felt like this one was an improvement. It’s largely lauded as the worst of the series; the dud that killed it. But in fact, I think it was just too soon. It was overload. There was too much. It was possibly already too late before this movie came out.

But watching it after a long break? (We watched 1-6 in two weeks or so, many months ago.) I think that improved the experience.

Anyway, this one felt less formulaic! It’s definitely not the worst of the franchise! Yeah, there were a lot of bad/fall-flat jokes, especially in the beginning… But ultimately, it broke the formula a bit, and was a more interesting movie than the last few. Harris actually becomes useful! And works on the same team as the people he worked against in 1-6. He’s still a jerk, but a useful one, now. He’s not quite as bumbling; he simply has no respect. The comedy is still there, though this movie is slightly more serious. And that’s okay. We needed some change.

Plus, they are in RUSSIA!! It looks suspiciously like America, but with more moustaches and hats and fur coats.

Plus, some of the cast: See Cornfed from Duckman before he was Cornfed, Ron Perlman before he was Hellboy, and Christopher Lee before he was Count Duku[la]!!

Anyway… I see no reason to write off this final installment the way so many do. I think they were looking for redemption where none was to be found. It is what it is, and was actually slightly more enjoyable to us than both Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach and Police Academy 6: City Under Siege.

CAROLYN’S THOUGHTS: This did seem to be less formulaic than the others. It was entertaining, and it seemed to have its own feel, yet still felt like a Police Academy movie.

PEOPLE:

Directed by Alan Metter (Back To School).
Written by Randolph Davis (1 ep of Tales From The Crypt) and Michele S. Chodos.

Starring:
From the previous movies:
David Graf (Police Academy 1-7, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ferris Bueller, 1 ep of Night Court, 1 ep of MASH, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Tackleberry.
Michael Winslow (Police Academy 1-7 and the series, Spaceballs, Gremlins, 3 eps of The Love Boat, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Larvell Jones.
George Gaynes (Police Academy 1-7, Henry in Punky Brewster, Wag The Dog, 1 ep of Sliders) as Commandant Lassard.
G.W. Bailey (Police Academy 1,4-7 Short Circuit, Mannequin, 14 eps of MASH, 1 ep of Soap, 1 ep of Nip/Tuck) as Lt. Harris.
Leslie Easterbrook (Police Academy 1,3-7, The Devil’s Rejects, Laverne & Shirley, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Sgt. Callahan, the hot blonde.

New people:
Christopher Lee (Saruman in the Lord Of The Rings movies, Death in The Color Of Magic, The Golden Compass, Count Dooku in Star Wars Episode 2 and Star Wars: The Clone Wars pilot movie, Alice In Wonderland, Corpse Bride, Sleepy Hollow, Gremlins 2) as Commandant Rakov, the leader of the Russian police force.
Ron Perlman (Hellboy, City Of Lost Children, Pacific Rim, Percy Jackson 2, Alien 4, Titan A.E.) as Constantine Konali, the Russian bad guy.
Claire Forlani (Mall Rats) as Katrina, the Russian translator.
Charlie Schlatter (Ferris Bueller in the Ferris Bueller TV series, G.I. Joe: Renegades, 3 eps of The Batman, 1 ep of Jackie Chan Adventures, 1 ep of The Life & Times Of Tim, 1 ep of The Boondocks) as Cadet Connors, obligatory good-looking kid in order to be able to have a love interest.
Gregg Berger (Cornfed from Duckman, Odie from Garfield & Friends and The Garfield Show (2008), Kay from Men In Black:TAS, Grimlock in The Transformers, The Angry Beavers, Toxic Crusaders, Mysterio in Spider-Man-TAS (1990s), 6 eps of Life With Louie, 5 eps of Rugrats, 4 eps of The Grim Adventures Of Billy & Mandy, 4 eps of Batman Beyond, 2 eps of Star Wars: The Clone Wars, 2 eps of Batman: The Brave And The Bold) as Lt. Talinsky, Russian policeman. (more…)

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Police Academy 6: City Under Siege (1989)

Clio: 3/5 stars, 6/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 6/10.
Native ratings: 3.1/5 stars Netflix, 3.9/10 IMDB.

Hank (the cop) from Breaking Bad AND Chloe from Smallville are both in this movie, though almost nobody (including us) will notice this.

Carolyn’s thoughts: This was more like The Pink Panther about a theft gang on a stealing spree. The team are brought in to help Captain Harris catch the thieves, and then Commandant Lassard is framed so they try to clear his name. Still going.

Clio: Yup. Still going. These Police Academy movies get really unremarkable, but at least this one had a sort of mystery plot to it that the others didn’t have. That helped stave off the rate of decay of the franchise a bit…

Directed by Peter Bonerz (29 eps of Home Improvement, 12 eps of Friends, 11 eps of Wings, 9 eps of Alf, 3 eps of Just Shoot Me, 3 eps of Joey, 2 eps of Newsradio, 2 eps of Shit My Dad Says).
Written by Stephen Curwick (Police Academy 5-6, 5 eps of Family Ties, 2 eps of Growing Pains, 1 ep of Who’s The Boss?).

Starring
From the previous movies:
Bubba Smith (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Married With Children, 1 ep of Sabrina The Teenage Witch, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Moses Hightower.
David Graf (Police Academy 1-7, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ferris Bueller, 1 ep of Night Court, 1 ep of MASH, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Tackleberry.
Michael Winslow (Police Academy 1-7 and the series, Spaceballs, Gremlins, 3 eps of The Love Boat, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Larvell Jones.
Leslie Easterbrook (Police Academy 1,3-7, The Devil’s Rejects, Laverne & Shirley, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Sgt. Callahan, the hot blonde.
George Gaynes (Police Academy 1-7, Henry in Punky Brewster, Wag The Dog, 1 ep of Sliders) as Commandant Lassard.
George R. Robertson (Police Academy 1-6, National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, JFK) as Chief Hurnst.
Marion Ramsey (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Tim And Eric Awesome Show Great Job!, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Laverne Hooks, the quiet one.
G.W. Bailey (Police Academy 1,4-7 Short Circuit, Mannequin, 14 eps of MASH, 1 ep of Soap, 1 ep of Nip/Tuck) as Lt. Harris.
Lance Kinsey (Police Academy 2-6, Loaded Weapon 1) as Proctor.

From the last movie:
Matt McCoy (Police Academy 5-6, 4 eps of Carnivale, 2 eps of Seinfeld, 1 ep of Six Feet Under) as Nick, Lassard’s nephew, pretty much Mahoney’s replacement.

New people:
Allison Mack (Chloe Sullivan from Smallville) as Little Girl. This was her film debut.
Dean Norris (Hank the cop/brother-in-law from Breaking Bad) as cop in gym. Not even credited. No, we didn’t notice him.
Kenneth Mars (Triton in The Little Mermaid, The Apple Dumpling Gang Rides Again, 26 eps of Malcolm In The Middle, 9 eps of Pirates Of Darkwater, 4 eps of Life With Louie, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of Lois & Clark, 1 ep of The Real Adventures Of Jonny Quest, 1 ep of The Angry Beavers) as The Mayor / The Mastermind
Brian Seeman (2 eps of Sabrina The Teenage Witch, 1 ep of Murphy Brown) as Flash
Darwyn Swalve (Barton Fink, Summer School, 1 ep of The A Team) as Ox
Beans Morocco (Bob The Janitor in Police Academy 5, New Nightmare, Once Bitten, 6 eps of Growing Pains, 2 eps of Mork & Mindy, 2 eps of Laverne & Shirley, 1 ep of Soap, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Mad About You, 1 ep of Caroline In The City, 1 ep of Murphy Brown) as Bank President

From previous movies:
Bruce Mahler (Police Academy 1-3,6, Fridays, 3 eps of Seinfeld, uncredited in Loaded Weapon 1, uncredited in Dick Tracy) as Doug Fackler.
Billie Bird (Police Academy 4,6, 2 eps of The Wonder Years, 1 ep of Cheers, 1 ep of Max Headroom, 1 ep of Murphy Brown, 1 ep of Who’s The Boss) as Mrs. Feldman. She played Mrs. Feldman in Police Academy 4. I guess it was a different character altogether, but I didn’t remember to notice her.
Arthur Batanides (Police Academy 2-4,6, 5 eps of Happy Days, 4 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 3 eps of The Odd Couple, 2 eps of Wonder Woman, 1 ep of Star Trek) as Old Man Kirkland.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098105/combined

Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach (1988)

Carolyn’s thoughts: They tried to mix it up a bit by changing the setting and putting them into Miami Beach.  Still the same formula, but entertaining enough.  No mention of what happened to Mahoney.

Claire’s thoughts: Exactly. They’re still doing it… But they’ve lost Steve Guttenberg for good. Strangely… I didn’t really notice. With or without him, it’s pretty much “same shit, different instance”. It works. It’s still working. It’s good that they made this. It’s good that we watched it. But it’s not very special. It’s another episode of The Simpsons at this point. I’m fine with that, but the only reason to watch Police Academy 5 is that you watched Police Academy 1 through 4.

Directed by Alan Myerson (12 eps of Laverne & Shirley, 8 eps of The Larry Sanders Show, 5 eps of Newsradio, The Single Guy, 2 eps of Friends, 2 eps of Ned And Stacey).
Written by Stephen Curwick (Police Academy 5-6, 5 eps of Family Ties, 2 eps of Growing Pains, 1 ep of Who’s The Boss?).

Starring
From the previous movies:
Bubba Smith (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Married With Children, 1 ep of Sabrina The Teenage Witch, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Moses Hightower.
David Graf (Police Academy 1-7, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ferris Bueller, 1 ep of Night Court, 1 ep of MASH, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Tackleberry.
Michael Winslow (Police Academy 1-7 and the series, Spaceballs, Gremlins, 3 eps of The Love Boat, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Larvell Jones.
Leslie Easterbrook (Police Academy 1,3-7, The Devil’s Rejects, Laverne & Shirley, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Sgt. Callahan, the hot blonde.
George Gaynes (Police Academy 1-7, Henry in Punky Brewster, Wag The Dog, 1 ep of Sliders) as Commandant Lassard.
George R. Robertson (Police Academy 1-6, National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, JFK) as Chief Hurnst.
Marion Ramsey (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Tim And Eric Awesome Show Great Job!, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Laverne Hooks, the quiet one.
G.W. Bailey (Police Academy 1,4-7 Short Circuit, Mannequin, 14 eps of MASH, 1 ep of Soap, 1 ep of Nip/Tuck) as Lt. Harris.
Lance Kinsey (Police Academy 2-6, Loaded Weapon 1) as Proctor.

From the last movie:
Tab Thacker (Police Academy 4-5) as House, the fat cadet.

New people:
Matt McCoy (Police Academy 5-6, 4 eps of Carnivale, 2 eps of Seinfeld, 1 ep of Six Feet Under) as Nick, Lassard’s nephew, pretty much Mahoney’s replacement.
Janet Jones (A League Of Their Own) as Kate, Nick’s female police officer love interest.
Rene Auberjonois (Star Trek: Deep Space 9, Pirates Of Darkwater, Benson, 4 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 4 eps of Justice League, 2 eps of Young Justice, 1 ep of Men In Black-TAS, 1 ep of Family Guy) as Tony, the main bad guy.
Archie Hahn (John Tucker Must Die, Gremlins 2) as Mouse, a henchman.
James Hampton (Teen Wolf series, 3 eps of Full House, 2 eps of Punky Brewster, 1 ep of Hope & Gloria, 1 ep of Valerie) as Mayor of Miami.

Missing from this movie, but will be returning:
Bruce Mahler (Police Academy 1-3,6, Fridays, 3 eps of Seinfeld, uncredited in Loaded Weapon 1, uncredited in Dick Tracy) as Doug Fackler.
Arthur Batanides (Police Academy 2-4,6, 5 eps of Happy Days, 4 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 3 eps of The Odd Couple, 2 eps of Wonder Woman, 1 ep of Star Trek) as Old Man Kirkland.
Billie Bird (Police Academy 4,6, 2 eps of The Wonder Years, 1 ep of Cheers, 1 ep of Max Headroom, 1 ep of Murphy Brown, 1 ep of Who’s The Boss) as Mrs. Feldman. IMDB says she plays Mrs. Stanwyck in Police Academy 6. Same character, different name, or different character altogether? Hmmm.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0095882/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (1987)

Claire: 3.2/5 stars, 7/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 7/10.
Native ratings: 3.2/5 stars Netflix, 4.6/10 IMDB.

Carolyn’s thoughts:  This had a similar scattered feel that the first movie had, but it seemed to have an even looser plot than the other movies.  Basically, this is just the first movie, but with civilians learning to be cops, but not actually get to be cops.  These are definitely starting to wear out their welcome.  This is the last one with Mahoney (Steve Guttenberg) in it.

Claire: Yup, it’s all getting to be a blur. This one’s still absolutely comparable with the first 3, but it’s starting to feel like episodes of a TV series, what with the repetitions, fomulaicness, catch-phrases, etc.

Directed by Jim Drake (Night Court, SCTV, Dave’s World, 5 eps of Who’s The Boss, 5 eps of Newhart, 1 ep of Valerie).
Written by Gene Quintano (Police Academy 2-4, Loaded Weapon 1).

Starring:

From the previous movies:
Steve Guttenberg (Police Academy 1-4, 3 Men And A Baby movies, Cocoon, Short Circuit) as Carey Mahoney.
Bubba Smith (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Married With Children, 1 ep of Sabrina The Teenage Witch, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Moses Hightower.
David Graf (Police Academy 1-7, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ferris Bueller, 1 ep of Night Court, 1 ep of MASH, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Tackleberry.
Michael Winslow (Police Academy 1-7 and the series, Spaceballs, Gremlins, 3 eps of The Love Boat, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Larvell Jones.
George Gaynes (Police Academy 1-7, Henry in Punky Brewster, Wag The Dog, 1 ep of Sliders) as Commandant Lassard.
George R. Robertson (Police Academy 1-6, National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, JFK) as Chief Hurnst.
Marion Ramsey (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Tim And Eric Awesome Show Great Job!, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Laverne Hooks, the quiet one.
Bobcat Goldthwait as Zed.
Colleen Camp (Police Academy 2,4, Four Christmases, Last Action Hero, Sliver, Wayne’s World, Clue, Apocalypse Now, Speed 2, Plump Fiction, 3 eps of Roseanne) as Kirkland.
Jackie Joseph (Police Academy 2,4, Gremlins, 8 eps of Josie & The Pussycats, 3 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 1 ep of Full House, 1 ep of Designing Women, 1 ep of Newhart) as Mrs. Kirkland.
Tim Kazurinsky (Police Academy 2-4, Plump Fiction, Hot To Trot, 2 eps of Curb Your Enthusiasm) as Sweetchuck.
Lance Kinsey (Police Academy 2-6, Loaded Weapon 1) as Proctor.
Andrew Paris (Police Academy 2-4, 3 eps of Happy Days) as Bud Kirkland.
Arthur Batanides (Police Academy 2-4,6, 5 eps of Happy Days, 4 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 3 eps of The Odd Couple, 2 eps of Wonder Woman, 1 ep of Star Trek) as Old Man Kirkland.
Leslie Easterbrook (Police Academy 1,3-7, The Devil’s Rejects, Laverne & Shirley, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Sgt. Callahan, the hot blonde.
Scott Thomson (Police Academy 1,3-4, Twister, Ghoulies, 1 ep of Parker Lewis Can’t Lose) as Chad Copeland.
Brian Tochi (Police Academy 3-4, Leonardo in all three Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, Revenge Of The Nerds 3, 10 eps of Johnny Bravo, 4 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 2 eps of The Grim Adventures Of Billy & Mandy, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Samurai Jack) as Cadet Nogata.

New people:
Sharon Stone as Claire Mattson. So young.
Derek McGrath (Mr. Mom, 4 eps of Cheers, 2 eps of Star Trek: Voyager, 2 eps of Family Matters, 1 ep of Married With Children) as Butterworth.
Billie Bird (Police Academy 4,6, 2 eps of The Wonder Years, 1 ep of Cheers, 1 ep of Max Headroom, 1 ep of Murphy Brown, 1 ep of Who’s The Boss) as Mrs. Feldman. IMDB says she plays Mrs. Stanwyck in Police Academy 6. Same character, different name, or different character altogether? Hmmm.
David Spade as Kyle. This was his first role?!?!?!?!
Brian Backer (Fast Times At Ridgemont High, The Money Pit, 1 ep of Growing Pains) as Arnie, Kyle’s friend.
Tab Thacker (Police Academy 4,5) as House, the fat cadet.
Corinne Bohrer (Joysticks, 2 eps of Herman’s Head, 1 ep of Friends, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ned & Stacey, 1 ep of Will & Grace) as Laura, Zed’s love interest.
Randall ‘Tex’ Cobb (Raising Arizona, Naked Gun 33 1/3, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, 1 ep of Married With Children) as Zack.
Michael McManus (The Kentucky Fried Movie, 4 eps of Night Court, 2 eps of It’s Garry Shandling’s Show, 1 ep of Married With Children, 1 ep of Mr. Belvedere, 1 ep of Doogie Howser MD, 1 ep of Coach) as Todd.
Jack Creley (Videodrome, Dr. Strangelove Or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb, 1 ep of Friday The 13th: The Series) as Judge.
Tony Hawk as a skateboarder. (IMDB trivia says he was fired from being David Spade’s skateboarding double because he was too tall, so apparently, he was just a guy skating with them.)

Missing from this movie, but will be returning:
Bruce Mahler (Police Academy 1-3,6, Fridays, 3 eps of Seinfeld, uncredited in Loaded Weapon 1, uncredited in Dick Tracy) as Doug Fackler.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093756/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Police Academy 3: Back in Training (1986)

Claire: 3.4/5 stars, 7/10.
Carolyn: 3.4/5 stars, 7/10.
Native ratings: 3.2/5 stars Netflix, 5.0/10 IMDB.

Claire’s thoughts: A good thing was more new characters, and old character in new roles. Bobcat Goldthwait made a hilariously-weird street thug, and now he gets to be a hilariously-weird cop.  Getting to use a character in two roles strikes me as both brilliant AND lazy, which are both hallmarks of good low-budget filmmaking.

Unfortunately, at this point, the franchise is becoming a bit formulaic and repetitive.   Some of the jokes are the same jokes.. Again.   And the jokes just aren’t that funny (in 2014, when I’m writing this) to bear repeating 3 times. Maybe they were in 1986, but they aren’t in 2014.

Carolyn’s thoughts:  This one wasn’t as good as the first 2, but it was still entertaining.

Directed by Jerry Paris (Police Academy 2-3, 238 eps of Happy Days, 18 eps of The Odd Couple, 3 eps of The Munsters, 3 eps of The Mary Tyler Moore Show, 1 ep of Laverne & Shirley).
Written by Gene Quintano (Police Academy 2-4, Loaded Weapon 1).

Starring
From the previous movies:
Steve Guttenberg (Police Academy 1-4, 3 Men And A Baby movies, Cocoon, Short Circuit) as Carey Mahoney.
Bubba Smith (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Married With Children, 1 ep of Sabrina The Teenage Witch, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Moses Hightower.
David Graf (Police Academy 1-7, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ferris Bueller, 1 ep of Night Court, 1 ep of MASH, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Tackleberry.
Michael Winslow (Police Academy 1-7 and the series, Spaceballs, Gremlins, 3 eps of The Love Boat, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Larvell Jones.
Bruce Mahler (Police Academy 1-3,6, Fridays, 3 eps of Seinfeld, uncredited in Loaded Weapon 1, uncredited in Dick Tracy) as Doug Fackler.
George Gaynes (Police Academy 1-7, Henry in Punky Brewster, Wag The Dog, 1 ep of Sliders) as Commandant Lassard.
George R. Robertson (Police Academy 1-6, National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, JFK) as Chief Hurnst.
Marion Ramsey (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Tim And Eric Awesome Show Great Job!, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Laverne Hooks, the quiet one.

Returning from the second movie:
Art Metrano (Police Academy 2-3, 5 eps of Bewitched, 2 eps of Fantasy Island, 1 ep of Herman’s Head, 1 ep of 21 Jump Street, 1 ep of Punky Brewster) as Lt. Mauser.
Bobcat Goldthwait as Zed.
Tim Kazurinsky (Police Academy 2-4, Plump Fiction, Hot To Trot, 2 eps of Curb Your Enthusiasm) as Sweetchuck.
Lance Kinsey (Police Academy 2-6, Loaded Weapon 1) as Proctor.
Andrew Paris (Police Academy 2-4, 3 eps of Happy Days) as Bud Kirkland.
Arthur Batanides (Police Academy 2-4,6, 5 eps of Happy Days, 4 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 3 eps of The Odd Couple, 2 eps of Wonder Woman, 1 ep of Star Trek) as Old Man Kirkland.

Returning from the first movie:
Leslie Easterbrook (Police Academy 1,3-7, The Devil’s Rejects, Laverne & Shirley, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Sgt. Callahan, the hot blonde.
Debralee Scott (Police Academy 1,3, Mary Hartman Mary Hartman, 6 eps of Welcome Back Kotter, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Mrs. Fackler.
Scott Thomson (Police Academy 1,3-4, Twister, Ghoulies, 1 ep of Parker Lewis Can’t Lose) as Chad Copeland.
Brant von Hoffman (Police Academy 1,3, 1 ep of Arrested Development, 1 ep of Laverne & Shirley) as Kyle Blankes.
Georgina Spelvin (Police Academy, porn star) as The Hooker.

new people:
Shawn Weatherly (19 eps of Baywatch, 1 ep of Dukes Of Hazzard, 1 ep of Happy Days) as Cadet Adams.
Ed Nelson (6 eps of Gunsmoke, 1 ep of Dynasty, 1 ep of CHiPS) as Governor Neilson.
Brian Tochi (Police Academy 3-4, Leonardo in all three Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, Revenge Of The Nerds 3, 10 eps of Johnny Bravo, 4 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 2 eps of The Grim Adventures Of Billy & Mandy, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Samurai Jack) as Cadet Nogata.
David Huband (Wrong Turn, 2 eps of Puppets Who Kill) as Cadet Hedges.

Missing from this movie, but will be returning:
Colleen Camp (Police Academy 2,4, Four Christmases, Last Action Hero, Sliver, Wayne’s World, Clue, Apocalypse Now, Speed 2, Plump Fiction, 3 eps of Roseanne) as Kirkland.
Jackie Joseph (Police Academy 2,4, Gremlins, 8 eps of Josie & The Pussycats, 3 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 1 ep of Full House, 1 ep of Designing Women, 1 ep of Newhart) as Mrs. Kirkland.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091777/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment (1985)

Claire: 3.6/5 stars, 7/10.
Carolyn: 4/5 stars, 8/10.
Native ratings: 3.2/5 stars Netflix, 5.5/10 IMDB.

Carolyn’s thoughts:  I think I liked this ever so slightly better than the first one, but I couldn’t pinpoint why.  Maybe it was because it didn’t seem as scattered, and there was more of an underlining plot to follow.  Bobcat Goldthwait is so weird!

Claire thoughts: I actually feel like I didn’t quite like it as much. I guess the novelty of #1 wears off by #2. And I have to watch 5 more of these?!?  When I think back, it’s an enjoyable and entertaining movie, as much as #1. I just didn’t seem to get quite as much out of it.

Directed by Jerry Paris (Police Academy 2-3, 238 eps of Happy Days, 18 eps of The Odd Couple, 3 eps of The Munsters, 3 eps of The Mary Tyler Moore Show, 1 ep of Laverne & Shirley).
Written by Barry W. Blaustein (Police Academy 2-5, The Nutty Professor movies, 41 eps of Saturday Night Live) & David Sheffield (Police Academy 2-5, The Nutty Professor movies, 53 eps of Saturday Night Live).

Starring
From the first movie:
Steve Guttenberg (Police Academy 1-4, 3 Men And A Baby movies, Cocoon, Short Circuit) as Carey Mahoney.
Bubba Smith (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Married With Children, 1 ep of Sabrina The Teenage Witch, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Moses Hightower.
David Graf (Police Academy 1-7, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ferris Bueller, 1 ep of Night Court, 1 ep of MASH, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Tackleberry.
Michael Winslow (Police Academy 1-7 and the series, Spaceballs, Gremlins, 3 eps of The Love Boat, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Larvell Jones.
Bruce Mahler (Police Academy 1-3,6, Fridays, 3 eps of Seinfeld, uncredited in Loaded Weapon 1, uncredited in Dick Tracy) as Doug Fackler.
George Gaynes (Police Academy 1-7, Henry in Punky Brewster, Wag The Dog, 1 ep of Sliders) as Commandant Lassard.
George R. Robertson (Police Academy 1-6, National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, JFK) as Chief Hurnst.
Marion Ramsey (Police Academy 1-6, 1 ep of Tim And Eric Awesome Show Great Job!, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Laverne Hooks, the quiet one.

New people:

Colleen Camp (Police Academy 2,4, Four Christmases, Last Action Hero, Sliver, Wayne’s World, Clue, Apocalypse Now, Speed 2, Plump Fiction, 3 eps of Roseanne) as Kirkland, Tackleberry’s love interest.
Howard Hesseman (Gridlock’d, Halloween 2 (2009), WKRP In Cincinnati, 7 eps of Soap, 3 eps of That 70’s Show) as Pete Lassard.
Art Metrano (Police Academy 2-3, 5 eps of Bewitched, 2 eps of Fantasy Island, 1 ep of Herman’s Head, 1 ep of 21 Jump Street, 1 ep of Punky Brewster) as Lt. Mauser.
Bobcat Goldthwait as Zed.
Julie Brown (Plump Fiction, Clueless and the Clueless TV series, 6 eps of Animaniacs, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 2 eps of Laverne & Shirley, 1 ep of Six Feet Under) as Chloe. She was supposed to be a love interest, but her scenes were cut off. And TOTALLY UNRECOGNIZABLE from usual – she has short brunette hair instead of her lovely, long, red hair she ended up with when she became an MTV personality. I believe in middle school I decided that if there was an afterlife, I would spend much of it in her cleavage.
Peter Van Norden (The Naked Gun 2 1/2, 1 ep of Caroline In The City, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Vinnie Schtulman.
Tim Kazurinsky (Police Academy 2-4, Plump Fiction, Hot To Trot, 2 eps of Curb Your Enthusiasm) as Merchant.
Ed Herlihy (Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Pee-wee’s Big Adventure) as Dooley.
Sandy Ward (Airplane 2, 11 eps of Malcolm In The Middle, 2 eps of Seinfeld, 1 ep of Lois & Clark, 1 ep of Dream On) as Sistrunk.
Lance Kinsey (Police Academy 2-6, Loaded Weapon 1) as Proctor.
Arthur Batanides (Police Academy 2-4,6, 5 eps of Happy Days, 4 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 3 eps of The Odd Couple, 2 eps of Wonder Woman, 1 ep of Star Trek) as Old Man Kirkland.
Jackie Joseph (Police Academy 2,4, Gremlins, 8 eps of Josie & The Pussycats, 3 eps of The Dick Van Dyke Show, 1 ep of Full House, 1 ep of Designing Women, 1 ep of Newhart) as Mrs. Kirkland.
Andrew Paris (Police Academy 2-4, 3 eps of Happy Days) as Bud Kirkland.

People who are missing from this movie, but will return in later movies:
Leslie Easterbrook (Police Academy 1,3-7, The Devil’s Rejects, Laverne & Shirley, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Sgt. Callahan, the hot blonde. Thank god. These movies just aren’t the same without her tits.
Debralee Scott (Police Academy 1,3, Mary Hartman Mary Hartman, 6 eps of Welcome Back Kotter, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Mrs. Fackler.
Scott Thomson (Police Academy 1,3-4, Twister, Ghoulies, 1 ep of Parker Lewis Can’t Lose) as Chad Copeland.
Brant von Hoffman (Police Academy 1,3, 1 ep of Arrested Development, 1 ep of Laverne & Shirley) as Kyle Blankes.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089822/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Police Academy 1 (1984)

Claire: 4/5 stars, 8/10.
Carolyn: 4/5 stars, 7/10.
Native ratings: 3.5/5 stars Netflix, 6.6/10 IMDB.

They should use Michael Winslow more. But I guess he’ll be back in the other movies.  Wait…That was Kim Catrall??

That was fun. Reminds me of Stripes, but with police instead of military, and funnier.  I grew up on these movies, but I haven’t seen one in over 20 years. All 7 movies finally being available in HD means it’s time to watch them again, and remember what the fuss was about.

Pretty damn funny! Not a cinematic masterpiece, but we both laughed out loud. A lot. The movie was outrageous and out of touch back then, but now it’s even more strange. A relic. And damn, 30 years ago was definitely more homophobic. The movie was a truly a product of its time.

But anyway… The only thing I actually remember from watching this when I was younger… Is the bossy blonde academy instructor, and her tits. DEFINITELY worth returning to.

I’d really forgotten about all these quirky characters. They should make an adult cartoon about these guys.

Carolyn’s thoughts:  This was entertaining and fun.  A little fast-paced, and a little bit scattered, but it got us laughing out loud several times.  I didn’t remember much from when I saw this as a kid.

Directed by Hugh Wilson (2 eps of WKRP In Cincinnati).
Written by Neal Israel (Real Genius, Look Who’s Talking Too), Pat Proft (Scary Movie 3-5, Naked Gun movies, Hot Shots movies, The Star Wars Holiday Special), and Hugh Wilson (33 eps of WKRP In Cincinnati).

Steve Guttenberg (3 Men And A Baby movies, Cocoon, Short Circuit) as Carey Mahoney.
Kim Cattrall (Dee in Producing Parker, Samantha in Sex And The City, Star Trek 6, Porky’s, Big Trouble In Little China, Mannequin, 2 eps of The Simpsons, 1 ep of Duckman, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Rugrats) as Karen Thompson.
G.W. Bailey (Short Circuit, Mannequin, 14 eps of MASH, 1 ep of Soap, 1 ep of Nip/Tuck) as Lt. Harris.
Bubba Smith (1 ep of Married With Children, 1 ep of Sabrina The Teenage Witch, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Moses Hightower.
Donovan Scott (Back To The Future 3, 1 ep of Eagleheart) as Leslie Barbara.
George Gaynes (Henry in Punky Brewster, Wag The Dog, 1 ep of Sliders) as Commandant Lassard.
Andrew Rubin (2 eps of The Odd Couple) as George Martin.
David Graf (1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Ferris Bueller, 1 ep of Night Court, 1 ep of MASH, 1 ep of Family Matters) as Tackleberry.
Leslie Easterbrook (The Devil’s Rejects, Laverne & Shirley, 2 eps of Batman-TAS, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Sgt. Callahan, the hot blonde.
Michael Winslow (Spaceballs, Gremlins, 3 eps of The Love Boat, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Larvell Jones.
Debralee Scott (Mary Hartman Mary Hartman, 6 eps of Welcome Back Kotter, 1 ep of The Love Boat) as Mrs. Fackler, who jumped on the car.
Bruce Mahler (Fridays, 3 eps of Seinfeld, uncredited in Loaded Weapon 1, uncredited in Dick Tracy) as Doug Fackler.
Ted Ross (Stealing Home, 1 ep of Benson, 1 ep of The Cosby Show, 1 ep of The Jeffersons) as Captain Reed.
Scott Thomson (Twister, Ghoulies, 1 ep of Parker Lewis Can’t Lose) as Chad Copeland.
Brant von Hoffman (1 ep of Arrested Development, 1 ep of Laverne & Shirley) as Kyle Blankes.
Marion Ramsey (1 ep of Tim And Eric Awesome Show Great Job!, 1 ep of Robot Chicken) as Laverne Hooks, the quiet one.
George R. Robertson (National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, JFK) as Chief Hurnst.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087928/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: The Secret Of My Succe$s (1987)

Claire: 3/5 stars, 6/10.
Carolyn: 4/5 stars, 7/10.
Native ratings: 3.5/5 stars Netflix, 6.4/10 IMDB. (Pretty much the average of OUR votes!)

Carolyn’s thoughts: This was slightly better than I was expecting.  It was very formulaic, and very excessive with the montages, but it stayed pretty consistently funny throughout.  One montage reminded us of the first Pink Panther movie with the ridiculous sneaking around chasing each other.  I really enjoyed it.

Claire: Me, not quite as much. I would have liked this movie more, emotionally, if the plot resolution didn’t feel like such a deus ex machina. They had a good plot — but then the plot’s resolution seemed to come from left field. And the romance subplot just seemed unnecesary and distracting.

The rest was good. It had its laughs. It had its distinctly 80’s kind of comedic moments that you just don’t see in movies these days, because film finally learned how to do realism right, and that shit doesn’t always pass muster nowadays.  So it had that nostalgic charm to it.

But points against for lack of cohesion with the resolution.

And yes, 5 fucking montages is fucking excessive. But hey, it was the 80’s. You gotta have a montage. Even Rocky had a montage.

Directed by Herbert Ross (Footloose, Steel Magnolias).

Written by Jim Cash (Dick Tracy, Top Gun, Turner & Hooch, Anaconda, Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas), Jack Epps Jr. (Dick Tracy, Top Gun, Turner & Hooch, Anaconda, Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas) and AJ Carothers (5 eps of My Three Sons).

Starring:

Michael J. Fox as Brantley Foster / Carlton Whitfield.
Helen Slater (Supergirl, City Slickers, Talia Al Ghul in 4 eps of Batman-TAS, Lara-El in 3 eps of Smallville, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Seinfeld, 1 ep of Caroline In The City) as Christy Wills.
Richard Jordan (Dune) as Howard Prescott.
Margaret Whitton (Major League movies) as Vera Prescott.
John Pankow (Ira Buchman in Mad About You, 1 ep of Duckman) as Fred Melrose. I knew I recognized him, but I couldn’t place it.
Christopher Murney (Barton Fink) as Barney Rattigan.
Gerry Bamman (Home Alone movies) as Art Thomas.
Fred Gwynne (The Munsters, Fatal Attraction, The Boy Who Could Fly, Car 54 Where Are You?) as Donald Davenport.
Carol Ann Susi (Just Go With It, 2 eps of That 70’s Show, 2 eps of Seinfeld, 1 ep of Six Feet Under, 1 ep of Just Shoot Me) as Jean.
Elizabeth Franz as Grace Foster.
Drew Snyder (Cruel Intentions) as Burt Foster.
Susan Kellermann (Beetlejuice, The Devil’s Advocate, Planes Trains And Automobiles) as Maureen.
Barton Heyman (The Exorcist) as Arnold Forbush.
Mercedes Ruehl (Big, Gia, Last Action Hero, 5 eps of Frasier) as Sheila.
Rex Robbins (Vampire’s Kiss, The Royal Tenenbaums) as McMasters.
MacIntyre Dixon (Funny Farm, It’s Kind Of A Funny Story) as Ferguson.
Bill Fagerbakke (Broadway from Gargoyles, Coach, Patrick in Spongebob Squarepants, Roughnecks: The Starship Troopers Chronicles, Funny Farm, 4 eps of Batman: The Brave And The Bold, Halloween 2, 4 eps of Sym-Bionic Titan, 1 ep of Young Justice) as Ron.
Mark Margolis (Tio Salamanca in Breaking Bad, The Fountain, Hannibal, Pi, Black Swan, 10 eps of Oz) as Maintenence Man.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093936/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES/CARTOONS/COMIC BOOKS: REVIEW: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3 (1993)

Claire: 3/5 stars, 6/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 5.7/10.
Native ratings: 3.1/5 stars Netflix, 4.7/10 IMDB.

Oh joy: Corey Feldman returns as Donatello.  He had a lot of lines, this time.  Maybe he was all fucked up during the first movie and they had to throw away a lot of his lines?  It seemed like in TMNT1, Donatello was almost totally ignored *BECAUSE* he was Corey Feldman.  Not so, this time.

So anyway, this was a completely different kind of plot that did not involve The Shredder.  It was kind of a one-off plot that had nothing to do with the standard TMNT plot. TIME TRAVEL?  Unnecessary. But since they go to feudal Japan, it is at least relevant and not totally contrived.

It was mostly entertaining though, and definitely not as cheesy or corny as the second movie. And with more fights. So it’s one of those rare threequels that’s better than the sequel.

Except the suits. The turtle suits on the actors were inferior and looked stupider. Can’t win them all.

Written & directed by Stuart Gillard (directed 20 eps of the new 90210, writer of 1 ep of Mork & Mindy, 1 ep of Three’s Company).

Starring:

All three movies:
Robbie Rist (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1, Sharknado, Michelangelo in a 2011 fanmade movie called Casey Jones, 1 ep of Jackie Chan Adventures, 1 ep of Batman-TAS) as Michaelangelo (voice).
Brian Tochi (Police Academy 3-4, Revenge Of The Nerds 3, 10 eps of Johnny Bravo, 4 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 2 eps of The Grim Adventures Of Billy & Mandy, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Samurai Jack) as Leonardo (voice).
From the second movie only:
Paige Turco (18 eps of Party Of Five, 18 eps of Guiding Light, 16 eps of All My Children) as April O’Neil.
Mark Caso as Leonardo / News Room Staff.

From the first movie:
Corey Feldman as Donatello (voice).
Elias Koteas (A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas, Let Me In, Defendor, Last Days On Mars, Shutter Island, The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button, Exotica) as Casey Jones.

New people:
Tim Kelleher (Independence Day, The Birdcage, 2 eps of American Dad, 1 ep of 24, 1 ep of Six Feet Under) as Raphael (voice).
Stuart Wilson (Hot Fuzz, Lethal Weapon 3) as Walker.
Sab Shimono (Uncle in Jackie Chan Adventures, Gung Ho, Waterworld, The Shadow, 6 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 3 eps of Samurai Jack, 2 eps of the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles series, 1 ep of The Boondocks, 1 ep of Max Headroom) as Lord Norinaga.
Vivian Wu (1 ep of Tales From The Crypt) as Mitsu.
Matt Hill (Soarin’ in My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, Havok in X-Men: Evolution, SheZow, Ed in Ed, Edd, n Eddy) as Raphael.
Jim Raposa as Donatello.
David Fraser (11 eps of Sailor Moon) as Michaelangelo.
James Murray (Susan The Monster in Greg The Bunny, The Brave Little Toaster Goes To Mars, uncredited student puppeteer in Being John Malkovich, 3 eps of Life With Louie) as Splinter.
Eidan Hanzei (Crank 2, 1 ep of Heroes, 1 ep of Sherman Oaks) as Kenshin.
John Aylward (Armageddon, 2 eps of Carnivale, 2 eps of Third Rock From The Sun, 1 ep of Nip/Tuck) as Niles.
Tad Horino (The Kentucky Fried Movie, Mulholland Dr., Bill & Ted‘s Bogus Journey) as Grandfather.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0108308/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES/CARTOONS/COMIC BOOKS: REVIEW: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Secret of the Ooze (1991)

Claire: 3/5 stars, 5.9/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 5.6/10.
Native ratings: 3.5/5 stars Netflix, 5.9/10 IMDB.

Claire’s thoughts: I was thinking this was pretty good, and would end up 4/5 stars like I rated the last one… And maybe 7/10 like the last one. But no. God no. Things really took a drastic turn for the worse when vanilla ice appeared and shit got ultra-corny.

Also, I find the whole idea of a caged rat learning martial arts a bit ridiculous – Even in a world where teenage mutant ninja turtles exist, it is still utterly fucking implausible that a rat in a cage learned kung fu by watching and imitating his master. And he’s always on their case about being teenagers… But rats only live 4 years. So he’s at most 23 himself.

But anyway… When you end with a song and a dance, you know you’ve lost that loving feeling.  Apparently Frank Oz or someone complained that TMNT 1 was too violent, so this one was more family friendly.

At least it wasn’t horrible.

Carolyn’s thoughts: Donatello was much more fleshed out in this one. At one point, I asked Claire, “See how many lines Donatello has now?” The difference is definitely noticeable. This one definitely was more cheesy and corny than the first one. (I think they tried to tone down the violence since Jim Henson was apparently upset about how violent the first one was.) Definitely jumped the shark when they had a Vanilla Ice rap.

Directed by Michael Pressman (2 eps of Weeds).

Written by Todd W. Langen (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1, 7 eps of The Wonder Years) & Bobby Herbeck (3 eps of Small Wonder, 1 ep of Diff’rent Strokes).

Starring:

From the first movie:

Robbie Rist (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1, Sharknado, Michelangelo in a 2011 fanmade movie called Casey Jones, 1 ep of Jackie Chan Adventures, 1 ep of Batman-TAS) as Michaelangelo (voice).
Brian Tochi (Police Academy 3-4, Revenge Of The Nerds 3, 10 eps of Johnny Bravo, 4 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 2 eps of The Grim Adventures Of Billy & Mandy, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Samurai Jack) as Leonardo (voice).
David McCharen (Men At Work, Ice Age 3) as The Shredder / Oroko Saki (voice).
Michael McConnohie (Resident Evil: Damnation, 1 ep of Wolverine anime, and a lot of video games and anime including Dragon Ball and Robotech) as Tatsu (voice).
Kevin Clash (Elmo in Sesame Street) as Splinter (voice).
Michelan Sisti as Michaelangelo / Soho Man.
Leif Tilden as Donatello / Foot #3.
Toshishiro Obata as Tatsu.
Raymond Serra as Chief Sterns.

Someone who was in the first movie, but as a different character:

Kenn Scott (Talkative Foot #2 in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1) as Raphael (as Kenn Troum). WHAT A PROMOTION!

New people:
Laurie Faso (The Hunchback Of Notre Dame, 18 eps of The Transformers, 1 ep of Jesse) as Raphael (voice).
Adam Carl (1 ep of Batman-TAS, 3 eps of Designing Women, 3 eps of Who’s The Boss?) as Donatello (voice). Corey Feldman is out.
Paige Turco (18 eps of Party Of Five, 18 eps of Guiding Light, 16 eps of All My Children) as April O’Neil. This is the movie of the 3 movies that she is the hottest in, though the red hair is missed.
David Warner (Archmage in Gargoyles, Ra’s Al Ghul in Batman, In The Mouth Of Madness, Lord Downey in Hogfather, Sweeney Todd, Avatar, Black Death, 9 eps of Men In Black: The Series) as Professor Jordon Perry.
Mark Caso as Leonardo / News Room Staff. He’ll be back in TMNT 3.
Ernie Reyes Jr. (Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull, Rush Hour 2) as Keno.
François Chau (Lethal Weapon 4, 11 eps of G.I. Joe (1980s), 2 eps of Childrens Hospital, 1 ep of 24) as Shredder (as Francois Chau).
Mark Ginther (Iron Man 3, 1 ep of Buffy The Vampire Slayer) as Rahzar.
Kurt Bryant (1 ep of Titus) as Tokka.
Kevin Nash (he’s a wrestler, Grandma’s Boy) as Super Shredder.
and of course, Frank Welker as Rahzar / Tokka (voice).

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103060/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES/CARTOONS/COMIC BOOKS: REVIEW: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)

Claire: 4/5 stars, 6.6/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 6.6/10.
Native ratings: Netflix sucks, 6.7/10 IMDB.

I am in a unique position of having never been exposed to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles until 2013. I’d not read one comic book (not even one panel), nor seen even one animated second of any TMNT cartoon.  When the new CGI animated series came out in 2013, I decided to give it a shot to see what I’d been missing…. And we both love it. It’s nice to have a lighthearted superhero cartoon to go with all our slightly-more-serious Marvel/DC-type superhero cartoons.

SO I’M FINALLY SEEING SOMETHING TMNT FROM THE 20TH CENTURY by watching all 3 movies this week. About goddamn time.

And y’know what? The new cartoon is better.  I probably wouldn’t have liked this nearly as much without priming up with the new version. And now I’m ready for the Michael Bay version. Bring it on, Michael. There’s nothing you can do to me that you haven’t done before. My body is ready.

Carolyn’s thoughts: I had watched the original animated series when it was on back in the 80’s, but when the movies came out, I wasn’t interested. Nowadays, I don’t remember that much from the original series, but we’ve been watching the new animated series. The new animated series is actually really good. Back to this movie, some of the jokes fell flat. It might have been better if I watched this when I was younger, because maybe it just didn’t live up to the test of time. I don’t remember much of the original series, but now that I’m comparing it to the new series, maybe that is why I didn’t enjoy it as much.

I don’t remember how Donatello was in the original series, but he really seemed like a throwaway character in this movie. I noticed that they barely touched Donatello’s character in this movie, and he just came across as really really lame. And then I found out Corey Feldman did his voice, and it was the worst voice. Poor Corey Feldman. It’s almost like he sucked so bad that they didn’t give him very many lines, or maybe he said a lot more originally and they cut it all out. I don’t know.

Directed by Steve Barron (Coneheads, The Adventures Of Pinocchio).

Written by Todd W. Langen (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2, 7 eps of The Wonder Years) & Bobby Herbeck (3 eps of Small Wonder, 1 ep of Diff’rent Strokes).

Starring:
Judith Hoag (Salt, Armageddon, 1 ep of Weeds, 1 ep of Dream On, 1 ep of Mad About You) as April O’Neil.
Corey Feldman as Donatello (voice).
Josh Pais (Michael & Michael Have Issues, Adventureland, Synecdoche New York, Scream 3, 1 ep of The Sopranos) as Raphael (voice).
David McCharen (Men At Work, Ice Age 3) as The Shredder / Oroko Saki (voice).
Michael McConnohie (Resident Evil: Damnation, 1 ep of Wolverine anime, and a lot of video games and anime including Dragon Ball and Robotech) as Tatsu (voice).
Elias Koteas (A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas, Let Me In, Defendor, Last Days On Mars, Shutter Island, The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button, Exotica) as Casey Jones.
Sam Rockwell (Zaphod Beeblebrox in The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy (2005), Iron Man 2, Galaxy Quest, Seven Psychopaths, A Case Of You, Heist) as Head Thug.
Kenn Scott (Raphael in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2) as Talkative Foot #2.
Robbie Rist (Sharknado, Michelangelo in a 2011 fanmade movie called Casey Jones, 1 ep of Jackie Chan Adventures, 1 ep of Batman-TAS) as Michaelangelo (voice).
Brian Tochi (Police Academy 3-4, Revenge Of The Nerds 3, 10 eps of Johnny Bravo, 4 eps of Avatar: The Last Airbender, 2 eps of The Grim Adventures Of Billy & Mandy, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Samurai Jack) as Leonardo (voice).
Kevin Clash (Elmo in Sesame Street) as Splinter (voice).
James Saito (Life Of Pi, The Devil’s Advocate, Die Hard 2) as The Shredder / Oroko Saki.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100758/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Ghost Team One (2013)

Claire: 3/5 stars, 6/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 6/10.
Native ratings: 2.1/5 stars Netflix (ouch), 4.9/10 IMDB.

A horror-comedy mockumentary about a sexually charged ghost?  This could go wrong in a lot of ways.  Especially because mockumentary typically means “we can’t write, so let’s just improvise until something mediocre comes out”.

But this was better than a lot of mockumentaries. It did actually have a plot. It felt scripted, and not improvised that much.

“Did you just fuck the ghost?!?”

It was still very much a b-movie, mostly 3 people in a house, very little special effects, no soundtrack, and very low key in the way they acted  So it’s a bit off-putting if you’re looking for a high-budget blockbuster type movie. This is more like a comedy for people who can’t get enough laughs.

Carolyn: We threw this one after Walking Dead hoping that it would be an entertaining way to end the evening. Unfortunately, this didn’t really live up. It was OK, but it was neither hilarious nor scary. One won’t miss anything by passing over this movie.

Claire: Funny thing – I passed out 40 minutes before the movie ended. Once that happened, I got to see about 75% of it, but none of it made sense due to the 25% I missed by falling asleep like… Every minute. We both were going to give it 2.6/5 stars, 5/10. Then I rewatched the last 40 minutes after dinner and it made a lot more sense. Most of the funniest stuff actually happened after I stopped being able to pay attention, so the movie redeemd itself.

Even Carolyn remarked that it was better the 2nd time through (and what a stupid movie to ever see twice!), raising her rating up to 3/5 stars, 6/10 (which is what I did too).

So…. This movie has its laughs and value. It’s just not great. Or particularly good. We ended up liking it.

Directed by Ben Peyser & Scott Rutherford.

Written by Andrew Knauer & Arthur Pielli.

Starring
Carlos Santos as Sergio.
J.R. Villarreal as Brad.
Fernanda Romero (3 Geezers, Drag Me To Hell) as Fernanda.
Tony Cavalero as Chuck.
Meghan Falcone as Becky.
James Babson (Hellboy, The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen, 1 ep of American Dad) as JW Menapace.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2272336/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Filth (2013)

Claire: 4.6/5 stars, 8.6/10.
Carolyn: 4.6/5 stars, 8.6/10.
Native ratings: 3.1/5 stars Netflix, 7.2/10 IMDB.

Based on a book written by the same author as Trainspotting, “A bipolar, bigoted junkie cop manipulates and hallucinates his way through the festive season in a bid to secure promotion and win back his wife and daughter.”

Yes… That sounds awesome, but this movie is even better than it sounds.  So intense.

It was a psychological thriller of sorts, but with a heap of comedy thrown in (mostly in the first half). Almost the same type of mix as Fight Club.  This actually had multiple aspects of Fight Club (a lot) and of Dark Horse (a tiny bit; I’m only thinking of Dark Horse because I *just* watched it).

I have to say, the main character in this movie is one of the most conniving, machiavellian, and cunningly sociopathic characters that I’ve ever seen in any story anywhere.  The subtle ways he attacks his enemies (who are also often his friends) are the most subtle and effective form of passive-aggressiveness that I’ve ever seen. Psychological warfare so subtle that the person doesn’t even know it is happening to them. Ruining someone’s life just so they will have slightly less self confidence at work. So you get that promotion.

This guy is the most evil co-worker ever, without just being some generic mass murderer type. The hypocricy and two-facedness of this character is truly unparalleled. I had to stop watching movies for a few days. It was a combination of getting 5 reviews behind, and not wanting to watch another movie because I wanted more time to think about this one. It’s stuck with me for days. This guy is a tool, but an incredibly effective tool. His ruthlessness is actually something to be impressed with. His tactics should be considered. Life isn’t fair, and playing by the rules is for sheep.

This man, as evil and sociopathic as he may be — is actually a role model for anyone who has ever wanted crush their enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their women. Just observing his behavior in this movie makes you realize that the scope of actions one can take in a situation is far larger than most realize. It’s almost inspiring and liberating to think that there are far more options out there than most of us would realize.

I don’t think I’d call him a role model, becuase he’s an evil fucking piece of shit… But if there were targets that actually *DESERVED* unfair treatment, his tactics would make him a role model.

This guy is no anti-hero, like, for example, Jason Statham in the Crank movies. He’s not doing wrong things for the right reason. He’s doing wrong things for the wrong reason. He’s a piece of shit, but the execution of his assholery is some of the most amazingly evil and cunning shit I’ve seen.

Carolyn’s thoughts: This was an intense movie. The accents sometimes were confusing, and it was hard to keep track of what was happening, but then overall, it was an intense fucked up movie. Definitely shows a descent into madness.

Claire: More like a descent OUT of madness, actually. Like Fight Club in that sense.

By the way: 25 logos in the credits! I count this every movie, and this is one of the highest counts ever.

“We’re filth. We come from filth, we’re going to filth, we’re filth!” -The Tick:TAS

Some other discussion:

Me: I feel like I’m wearing out my welcome on hurling movie recommendations at you.. but…this was pretty entertaining.

Radha: Hated the book  :/

Me: Maybe the movie is more fun and doesn’t take as long so it has the benefits without the cost? But yea, if you hated the book…. probably no point in watching the movie. Did you read trainspotting too?

Radha: Yeah, I read Trainspotting too. I liked it more than Filth but less than the movie. I basically hate Irvine Welsh’s writing style because I hate gimmicky bullshit and I hate things written in dialect.

Me:  so, clockwork orange and watership down are out?
Y’know, i can’t speak for writing, but for movies, i love gimmicky shit.

Radha: I didn’t like the book of Clockwork Orange nearly as much as the movie, except for the violence. Which is really unusual for me because ordinarily I like books much better than movies. It’s the dialect that aggravates me. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Me: Ahahaha yes indeed. I don’t mind that so much, to me it makes it more interesting… Thus I loved having to constantly go in between the actual story and the map-preface or glossary-appendix of Lord Of The Rings when reading it…… but i can see how if that was not your thing it would be a total fucking dealbreaker. LIke, if a movie did that to me, i might be like “fuck you, movie”

Jsun: Hm. I own this book.

Me: It could also be the case that this movie is more enjoyable than the book in the same way Radha thought Trainspotting-movie was better than Trainspotting-book. I dunno.

Matt McK: i can’t recall the book too much, read it 15 years ago, but was the tapeworm in the movie much? it’s only lightly mentioned in reviews. that was the weirdest part of the book…

Tapeworm?????? In the movie Filth? Not at all that I know of?

JSun: They left out the tapeworm?!?

Radha: Half the book is written by the tapeworm growing inside the guy. How the fuck could they leave that out??

JSun: Yeah… Major plot point left out. I’m not sure about this.

Claire: That seems like it would make the movie a little more zany and less realistic, more like Naked Lunch than Fight Club?

But yea… Movies are not cookie-cutter copies of books, or else every movie based on a book would be 3-4 hrs long, like those movjes that ARE cookie-cutter copies (lord of the rings, i’m looking at you, though even they left out stuff like tom bombadil for ex)

Claire: was the tapeworm the cause of his psychosis, then? I figured it was cocaine psychosis

Radha: It’s true that movies can’t be everything books are, but this particular plot point is so major that it wouldn’t even be the same story without it.

Claire: I’m kinda fine with that?
I mean, the movie the Naked Lunch was more about the writing of the book than what was in the book (which I’m not sure could ever actually be a film). Didn’t bother me because it was still a good movie.
Now, if they released a 4-hour version that contained every plot, I’d definitely watch it!
So was the tapeworm the cause of psychosis?

Radha: i dont remember

Claire: They should add an audiocommentary track that is narrated by the tapeworm!

Written & directed by Jon S. Baird.
Based on a novel by Irvine Welsh (Trainspotting novel).

Starring James McAvoy (Charles Xavier in X-Men: First ClassTrance, Mr. Tumnus in The Chronicles Of NarniaThe Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe, 1 ep of Band Of Brothers) as Bruce Robertson.
Imogen Poots (Fright Night, V For Vendetta28 Weeks Later) as Amanda Drummond.
Jamie Bell (Jumper) as Ray Lennox.
Shirley Henderson (Moaning Myrtle in the Harry Potter movies, Bridget Jones’s Diary movies) as Bunty.
Jim Broadbent (Cloud Atlas, Harry Potter movies, InkheartHot FuzzBrazil, Time Bandits, The Lion,The Witch,And The Wardrobe, Bridget Jones’s Diary, The Crying Game, Superman 4) as Dr. Rossi.
Eddie Marsan (The World’s End, Jack The Giant SlayerSnow White And The HuntsmanHancockV For Vendetta, 21 Grams) as Bladesey.
Emun Elliott (Prometheus) as Peter Inglis.
Kate Dickie (Prometheus) as Chrissie.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1450321/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Lust For Love (2014)

Claire: 3/5 stars, 6/10.
Carolyn: 2.6/5 stars, 5/10.
Native ratings: 5.8/10 IMDB. Not (yet?) available on Netflix.

Claire’s thoughts: VERY predictable romantic comedy. I mean, the ending may as well be telegraphed 10% of the way through, and I’ve seen this main plot 100 times. If you get more specific, I’ve seen this specific plot about 4 times too.

Of course, it’s still interesting to see the specifics on how things play out.  Is this what it’s like watching sports games?  The same things happen every game, but the specific details are what is interesting. Is that true? I don’t know, I’m not into sports.

So yes. I could describe this as “another rom-com about a guy who is trying to learn how to pick up chicks”, like The Long Weekend, or (to some extent) How To Stop Being A Loser. Fun, but utterly vapid and valueless.

Carolyn’s thoughts: This was a pathetic attempt at a movie.  It was just highly unremarkable.  Like Claire said, it was very predictable, and it just didn’t hold any merit.

Yet somehow Carolyn still rated it 2.6 stars, which rounds up to 3 stars (“Liked”). In other words, she still barely likes pathetic attempts at movies. It’s a good thing we generally enjoy movies… Or we’d watch a lot less of them ;)

Written & directed by Anton King.

Starring Fran Kranz (The Cabin In The Woods, Fanboy, The Village) as Astor.
Dichen Lachman as Cali.
Beau Garrett (Tron 2, Fantastic 4: Rise Of The Silver Surfer, Live!, 1 ep of Warren The Ape) as Mila.
Enver Gjokaj (Would You Rather, The Avengers, 1 ep of The Walking Dead) as Jake.
Karim Saleh (Iron Man 2) as Franck.
Felicia Day (Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, The Guild, 8 eps of Buffy The Vampire Slayer, 2 eps of Undeclared) as Mary.
Maurissa Tancharoen (Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D.) as Hazel.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2106529/combined

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