Sam W

So, Dildo Valerie‘s blog had a post called “life art“, where she talked about some of the stupid shit she does to have fun. It made me think of my own stupid shit, though it quite possibly doesn’t fall into the “life art” category. It was still fun.

We used to take our bicycles…

postcard - naked women on tandem bicycle - b41c2 (b&w)

Is this viewable to the public? It’s flagged as “moderate” on flickr.

And go to a busy corner in Lake Ridge (Oakwood Dr. & Woodfern Ct. was our favorite)…

2003 - Woodbridge - my childhood home - with cars in driveway -  o (by Britt)

My house from ~1982-1999.

Then we would walk/run our bikes into each other, to create a realistic crash…

20091206 - hit a deer - front left - GEDC0912

A real accident — with real deer poop

We would then get under the bikes, and twist our body into painful looking positions, to simulate crash injuries…

20090829 - Evan's parents' cabin - (by Tabbitha) - 0 - Clint - funny face, thumb touching arm - 3886135214_0c4fae8bf1_b

Help! I’ve fallen in a bike accident, and I can’t get up!

Of course, we weren’t really bloody…

19891031 - Sam W, Sara W - Halloween costumes - 0410

Sarah and Sam W… Sam was the one I typically did this prank with.

We would then wait for a car to come by, and stop all concerned, and be like, “ARE YOU OKAY?!?!?!?!?!”

20050910 - camping - 0682 - Vicky xterra

“Hey… Are you kids hurt?”

1990s (mid) - Theta Zeta - Ben - 05

“What the hell’s wrong with you guys?! Are you okay?! Your bodies are so twisted up… I think… I’m gonna… be… sick….”

But it was pretty fun to mess with people. For a second, they were tricked into believing they had witnessed VIOLENT TEENAGE HORROR!! But in reality, it was fake:

postcard - what's that up on the road a head - b39c1 (b&w)

I wonder if they would fall for this one too?

And the marks were of course the most helpful, good-willed people.

We weren’t targeting douchebags — we were targeting good Samaritans! Oh the irony.

I wonder if Doug got the same reactions when he went around like this?

1990s (mid) - Theta Zeta - Doug - covered in blood - 20


Mischief. Good times.


Oh man…. This is definitely on my “mean things I did” list. So this post is kind of a humorous story AND a confession of sorts.

The year was somewhere around 1990, and I was about a 10th grader in high school. I had dropped out of TJ and returned to my original school district, with a relatively clean social slate compared to before I left.

Clint on video in 1990 - OH!Z920

Me, around the same age, flicking off Dad as he camcorded me while picking me up from work at the now-defunct Weis Markets #125 of Lake Ridge, Woodbridge, VA.

So while walking around Woodbridge High School one day, I randomly found a lost object. It was this guy’s organizer. And it wasn’t just any organizer… It was SUPER-DUPER organized, and TOTALLY OCD beyond any levels I had seen.

Imagine this, but color-coded in every color visible to the human eye

Basically, this guy who I didn’t know (2,000 person school) had gone out of his way to REALLY organize his organizer. He had a key in the back, explaining his acronyms:

M. = Monday
T. = Tuesday
W. = Wednesday
Th. = Thursday
F. = Friday
S. = Saturday
S. = Sunday

Yes. He’d written this out by hand! He also had a box that he drew on the edge of EVERY page, where he inserted various meta information, such as “restriction ends in 45 days”, “restriction ends in 35 days”, “don’t lose organizer”.

He had a ridiculous amount of organizing. Me and my friend — I want to say Sam W, but I’m not positive — went through it, laughing at him a lot. He had put sooo much work into this organizer, but it was mostly pointless work, like color-code-highlighting his events. Orange=church, yellow=school, etc, etc.

The whole thing kind of offended me. Now don’t get me wrong — I hate people that are disorganized and can’t get their shit together — but as a 10th grader, there wasn’t a strong need for that. I didn’t become organized until the reward to effort ratio became much higher with the internet, and great tools such as Google Calendar. But the “organization” he was doing was more akin to Sisyphus pushing a boulder up a mountain just to have it fall down again. It was pointless work.

Hell, the proof was in his “don’t lose organizer” comment! You can write it down as much as you want, but it’s a waste of effort. If you don’t want to do something — take precautions against doing so. Thinking that writing something down repeatedly is something a poor teacher makes a bad student do. It doesn’t actually work as a deterrent, even when voluntary. Nor does singing hymns make you a better person; mindless repetition is meaningless. Critical thought is what counts.

1991ish - Clint's room - Shane the dog - 0445

My 'organizer' next to the phone - held my phone numbers prior to moving to computer file around 1988, a file that I still keep my numbers in today, 22 years later. I DON'T LOSE MY SHIT. I still have every number that was hand-written in this 'organizer'!

It was decided that we would use my phone (pictured above, actual room and phone) to call him. There was no caller id back then. You could *69, but all it did is give you the number. You had no way of doing a reverse lookup to find out who’s number it was. It was the wild west of prank call days; we prank called all the time. I’d even prank called the operator, and even called 911 (tho I did not prank them, only hung up on them. And yes, they called back.)

So we could probably call without impunity. But me and Sam played guitar together… a LOT:

1991ish - Clint's room - Sam, Clint - playing guitar - 0441

What?! This must be before I switched to the *blue* Dunlop (turtle) picks. Crazy. I always use blue now - just like Kim Deale of The Pixies. Green is simply too bendy for speedmetal chords. It's better suited to acoustic strumming.

We decided to use my a pitch-shifter pedal that I had bought for my guitar. It looked kinda like this, but it was blue:

It had echo, reverb, and pitch shift. I would pitch shift an octave lower, and play along with the bass for a song. Or pitch shift an octave up, and make “music box-sounding” guitar. It was great fun. But it was even more fun when plugged into a microphone! We pitch-shifted our voice at least an octave lower, and called the kid’s number from his lost organizer. It was an answering machine.

I don’t remember his name, so let’s just call him Dwight Schruite. Anyway, we left a message, in our pitch-shifted lower-than-humanly possible voices. “Dwwwwiiiight Shcruuiiiiiiiitte….. We have your organizerrrrrrrrr!!! We have your organizerrrr, and you’re never going to get it back! We’re going to burrrrn it! Ahhh HAHAH HAHHH HAHAHHH [demonic evil laughter goes on for awhile]”

CAG_Gossip - women/devil

Yeah... That was a little evil of me.

[SIDE TANGENT PARAGRAPH] We also called people on the last day before Christmas, yelling “Merry Fucking Christmas!” into the speaker-phone before hanging up. Dad actually figured that one out from upstairs, based on his supernatural ability to discern events happening in other floors. One time I bounced a rubber-band ball 1 foot on my bookshelf at 12:30AM, after going to bed, and dad came down… “It sounded like something hitting wood down here!” But I was expected to somehow not hear my parents doing their business above my bed.  This is why I sleep with music. Things like someone bouncing a rubber ball 12 inches on a different floor won’t bother me because it won’t be hearable over the sound of the music. If only Mark I would listen to that advice, he wouldn’t have to bring a goddamned white noise machine into his tent to sleep in a tent 100 ft away from ocean waves (which basicallymake white noise). [/TANGENT]

But I digress. It was a pretty mean thing to do. To “Dwight Shcruite”, whoever and whereever you are: I’m sorry about your organizer. I know the feeling of loss that must have caused, because I’ve lost things I’ve put a lot of work into more times than I want to remember. But it was just too laughable for me to care. So in a sense, I judged you, and punished you for being wanting. I suppose I have some negative karma from that, but fortunately for me I don’t believe in karma as a disembodied force.

It would be pretty funny to hear back from him via this blog, but I really doubt he’s going to be googling about an organizer he lost 20 years ago. And I would have trouble believing it to be him, even if a comment was left to that effect.

Sam? He eventually cut his hair:

1991ish - Clint's room - Sam - close-up - 0439
My friend Sam, who had super-long hair, then got it cut off in the EPIC HAIRCUT OF ALL TIME:

And that pitch-shifter pedal? It went on to Virginia Tech with me. When Dan C brought his PA to his dorm room, we hooked my pitch shifter pedal up to the microphone, and yelled into the Pritchard Hall pit. At one point, our RA was even talking to us about, “Yeah, some guy has a PA, and we’d really like to catch him”. Good times.

The pedal eventually broke, and I threw it away. Had I known about the restorative properties of contact cleaner, maybe I could have saved it. But hey, it was $80, used, from another kid at the school. It was a $270 pedal. I ran my computer’s sound through it, making the game Syndicate sound MUCH cooler with an echo. I used it for guitar, microphone, computer, and I’m sure I ran my television through it at some point for shits-n-giggles too. I miss that pedal.

“I like stories.” (more…)

Dreamed that my high school best friend Sam W was visiting. I was me, but I was still living in my parent’s house — once AGAIN (just like my last dream, which I didn’t post) in my mom’s “writing room” that used to be my sister’s room before I moved downstairs and she took my room. Or at the very least, I was looking out the window in that dream.

But the disturbing part was that Sylar from Heroes was chasing me! It kind of sucks to try to be murdered! And also, this guy I knew on the bus as a kid, John S, was there. And he was on Sylar‘s side, helping him! I ran into the house (which was no longer my parents’ Lake Ridge/Woodbridge house) trying to escape Sylar. It really sucked. I found a serrated knife. John S came in, and I knew he was going to tell Sylar he was there. So I took the knife and cut him across the wrist/arm. I did this like 15 times, and then cut his face/throat. (Do I tag him on my Facebook note? Or would that just be very disturbing to him? It’s just a dream, and in no way reflects any real-world desires or intentions on my part!)

So not only did I get the fear of trying to be murdered by a super-powered villain, but also the experience of brutally murdering someone. What a dream, what a dream…

I wonder if this has to do with the morbid cat vs. mouse #24 pictures I took yesterday?

“Dreams… They’re the hurricanes that wash the soulfilth from the superdome of our nightminds.”
-Xavier:Renegade Angel (more…)

This is one survey I’m going to do the hell out of, since this could easily be something that people write a blogpost about: What they experienced when they were 17. Since I can’t experience the events of a movie like 17 Again, I’ll just have to be content to try to remember my own 1991.

So I’m gonna answer the hell out of this survey. And include pictures. Of me when I was 17 / pictures taken around 1991.

Anyway, when I was 17, it was 1991. I was a sophomore and junior in high school. It was the year I received this for either my birthday or Christmas:

1991 - OH! - The Clint


1. My favorite musician was: Probably Glenn Danzig, because he wrote the music for all The Misfits songs, and they were my favorite band. (Nowadays, it’s a tie between Misfits, Ween, and Atari Teenage Riot)

1991ish - Clint's room - metal posters, Misfits vinyl - 0449
^ Wall of my room, 1991

2. My favorite song was: Hard to say, because I don’t really have favorite songs, in general. If I was asked this question today, it would be Atari Teenage RiotRevolution Action.



3. My favorite subject was: A.P. Computer Science 1. Where else could I goof off, sometimes sleep, and end up getting college credit (after taking both years in high school)?
I got a 5 on the harder of 2 AP tests, which meant 7 credit hours and not having to deal with PASCAL at the Virginia Tech class that causes most C.S. majors to drop out. I thik it was the dreaded CS 1701. If I remember that number correctly, it’s the only specific college class number I remember — and it’s of a class I didn’t take.

4. My favorite teacher was: Mr. Linz. Hands down. One of 5 or so teachers I even remember from high school. He got sick and I never knew if he died, until recently, when someone commented on this picture, telling me Mr. Linz had published a book about overcoming his illness .

1991ish - Clint - Wooodbridge High - Mr. Linz's physics class - Clint makes a funny face
^ Me in Mr. Linz’s class. Photographer unknown.

5. I had a crush on: This person (picture below) who really caused me to hate people with uptight issues… But it was good, because she broke me bad enough to keep my hands off any woman until I ran into Carolyn, who I waited until early 1992 to start crushing on :)

19900820 - bitch - Carver MA - 4499

6. Favorite food was: …and always shall be, tacos.

B&B - Citizen Butt-head - cafeteria

Even gummi tacos are pretty awesome:
20071226 - Christmas Presents - 146-4663 - build your own tacos

7. My favorite hangout was: Definitely my room. With my my bunk bed, the tacky tropical-tree wallpaper that came with our house:
1991ish - Clint's room - Clint - about to go to work - tie - flicking off - 0443

the carpet that was colored such that you could pour half a can of coke on the ground, leave it, and never notice:
1991ish - Clint's room - Shane the dog - 0445
(Yes, I poured sodas on my carpet many times to make my point)

and most of all, the fact that there was more privacy in my room than in most kid’s rooms:
1991ish - Clint's room - Clint, Sam - Ouija Board seance - 0437
1991ish - Clint's room - Brent - trying to be evil - sitting - 0451
No. We did not use it well.

8. I wished I could be: NO CLUE! I have always been quite content with being me. All I wanted to do was a job with computer programming.

9. My plans for the future were: At the beginning of 1991? Go to college and major in Computer Science. I also had always said I wouldn’t get married until I was 30… but I was off by 4 years and got married at 26.
At the end of 1991? My plans were along the lines of, “How do I start dating this Carolyn chick I know?”

10. My favorite TV show was: Twin Peaks. I came in near the end of its run, had no CLUE what the fuck was going on, and absolutely loved it!! Though it took me until 2007 to find it, propertly watch ALL of it in order (pilot, both seasons, Fire Walk With Me), and finally buy some Twin Peaks t-shirts:
20071215 - Clint - 144-4436 - Twin Peaks shirt - back

11. I hated: I’m going to assume it was not having sex, as I lost my virginity in 1990, had a couple things not work out that year (see #5), and didn’t hook up with Carolyn until 1992.

(If this was 1990, it would be my parents not letting me go to The Undead show. If this was 1992, it would be having to be separated from Carolyn while at Virginia Tech. 1991? Not really so terrible, other than the usual horrible bullshit I always had to deal with.)

12. It was the year: I met Carolyn. And we know how that turned out.
Her first words to me were, “Are you Satan?” And mine to her were, “Are you Magic Mist?” That’s not exactly taken from the book of traditional romantic opening lines.

19920223 - Carolyn's 16th Birthday Card from Clint - 1 - front

13. Best memory: Besides meeting Carolyn? Playing guitar/drums with Sam Watson in my room every day after school, until he moved to Mississippi:
1991ish - Clint's room - Sam, Clint - playing guitar - 0441

…and in general: BBSing, and still quite happy to finally being able to drive (got license in 5/1990).

14. Worst memory: #5 (Nikki) and #12 (best friend moving away). The comedic answer would be the lesson of “The Secret Center Is PAIN”:
1991ish - Secret Centers - the secret center is PAIN!
(Click through image for the story on why that makes sense.)

Hat tip to Parthena for posting this on Facebook.

Another 1991 gift:

20071208 - Christmas Party at Becky & Vic's - 143-4348 - Clint collage

My family, 1990ish (closest I could find to 1991):

1990ish - Vic, Becky, Britt, Clint - Beechnut Ct - 0103 (more…)

This is a Facebook meme going around, but I don’t like to post these ON Facebook….

“Think of 15 albums that had such a profound effect on you that they changed your life. Dug into your soul. Music that brought you to life when you heard it. Royally affected you, kicked you in the ass, literally socked you in the gut if you know what i mean. Then when you finish, tag 15 others, including myself. Make sure you copy and paste this message so the people you tag will know the drill.”

Well… This is a hard one. I listen to a LOT of music. I have 36,000 mp3s (and only about 3,000 of those aren’t music). I spent 5+ yrs listening to a random playlist of 9000 songs (typically limit myself to playlists of 1000-2000 songs these days). I went through a set of rechargeable (Nickel-Cadmium) walkman batteries every day in high school. I have music playing 24/7/365 at home. I often turn the in-game music off in video games, leaving only the sound effects, so I can use my own music. I bring music to work and listen non stop. I would be very hard pressed to choose my 100 favorite albums, let alone choose 15.

So this will be kind of random and arbitrary! I will probably focus on some of the albums I listened to when I was younger (high school), as they shaped my future tastes. I also will try not to repeat 2 albums by the same band.

01. Guns N’ Roses – Appetite For Destruction – first cassette I ever bought, around 1988. At first I would just listen to Sweet Child O’ Mine over and over again. Chris Hanners made fun of me. Eventually my favorite song became “It’s So Easy”, and now I’m also quite fond of “Rocket Queen”. I’ve heard (and played) Sweet Child O’ Mine enough for a lifetime.

02. Metallica – Ride The Lightning – not my first Metallica album – that was And Justice For All, arguably more influential because it helped get me into metal. But then I got Kill ‘Em All, and liked it better than Justice, listening to it about 400 times in high school. Ultimately, however, I decided on Ride The Lightning as my favorite Metallica album, and this hasn’t changed in 10 or 15 years. This is the only Metallica album that I would still consider listening straight through in sequential, today. Metallica themselves can fuck off and die in 2009; they should be burned on the high alter of hypocrisy.

03. Megadeth – So Far, So Good… So What? – Along with Metallica‘s And Justice For All, and Megadeth‘s 2nd album Peace Sells…But Who’s Buying?, this was one of the 3 albums that got me into thrash metal and metal in general (or speedmetal, as we called it back then). I started with Guns N’ Roses, moved on to Metallica & Megadeth, and progressed into Slayer, Anthrax, Testament, Kreator, Coroner, etc. This was also my introduction to the Sex Pistols, as Dave Mustaine‘s cover of “Anarchy In The UK” (retitled “Anarchy In The USA”) made me realize that Sex Pistols are a band I need to get into someday. (It took me until college to get around to this.)

04. 20080223 - cd longboxes - Nine Inch Nails: Pretty Hate Machine, Jane's Addiction: Nothing's Shocking, Ministry: The Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Taste, Gwar: Scumdogs Of The Universe, Type O Negative: Slow, Deep And Hard, Atari Teenage Riot: Live In Philad Jane’s Addiction – Nothing’s Shocking – After seeing “Mountain Song” on MTV’s Headbanger’s Ball (despite wikipedia claiming MTV wouldn’t air the video), I felt it slightly out of place. This was before 120 Minutes existed, back around 1988 or 1989, before Jane’s Addiction became mainstream. This was back when their 1st (live) album couldn’t be found in record stores, because they hadn’t “broke” yet. The cover artwork, in the form of a longbox CD case (remember those?), was perhaps the most subversive piece of art I owned, at age 14. I was a freshmen at the school across the street from my house. It wasn’t until I was a junior (1990-1991) that everyone seemed to know the song “Been Caught Stealing”. The songs were so incredibly powerful (Ocean Size, Had A Dad, Ted,Just Admit It, Standing In The Shower…Thinking, Mountain Song, Pigs In Zen.) To this day, I think the song “Jane Says” is probably the worst non-instrumental song on the album, maybe tied with Idiots Rule.

05. SabbatDreamweaver (Reflections Of Our Yesterdays) –  Click the album title for my 5800 word review on this album. One of 2 albums I have ever bought on all 3 formats: Cassette, Vinyl, and CD (original pressing for $54 and remaster for $26). I bought this because I liked the record company, Noise Records, and because I liked the cover art. It was around 1989. It was a truly random purchase. Extremely dense thrash metal, with TONS of lyrics for each song, and TONS of riffs. Sam Watson figured out that it was a concept album with an incredible story — and this was AFTER I had grown to love it. Eventually, lyrics surfaced on the internet, and I spent weeks in college listening to it over and over, fixing the lyrics until they were right. I had a national library search for the book it was based on fail twice, before finally succeeding some 10 yrs afterward. We now own the book it is based on, and have both read it. This might be my favorite metal album of all time, and is probably Carolyn’s too.

06. 20080223 - cd longboxes Violent Femmes – Violent Femmes – In my day, sonny, we didn’t have emo music. If you were crushing hard on a girl, or feeling a lot of teenage angst, you would listen to THIS album. Blister In The Son, Kiss Off, Prove My Love, Add It Up, Please Do Not Go, Gone Daddy Gone, To The Kill… This entire album was great, and helped show me that you could still rock with acoustic instruments, and “lead acoustic bass”. “Lead” bass is rare. Primus, Mr. Big (who I hated, but was impressed with the bassist), and some Violent Femmes were really all the music I could think of that had “lead” bass. I still remember an entire bus of random party-goers at Virginia Tech spontaneously breaking into singing this song. People from all kinds of different social standings and circles of friends united into a drunk carol of epic proportion — I remember that bus ride to this day. 4 years after getting into the album, I was surprised to find out that it was well known among all the other random Virginia Tech people. And later, they would play at Squires Student Center.

07. NoMeansNo – Live + Cuddly. NoMeansNo has way too many MASTERPIECE, EPIC albums for me to choose one. It’s really hard for me to choose a favorite between Wrong (the album), Small Parts Isolated and Destroyed / The Day Everything Became Nothing, Sex Mad / You Kill Me, or 0 + 2 = 1. But Live + Cuddly was the first NoMeansNo cassette I ever heard, after a guy named Dane played some of it for me in a car at a sleepover that Carolyn’s ex-ex-boyfriend had lured me to with the promise of cheerleaders also attending. (There weren’t any, and when we talked to some random chicks walking down the street, they informed us that the neighborhood nickname for this kid was “Turd”, lol.) Suffice to say that Dane helped me to influence the most people I have ever influenced in my life to like a band. When NoMeansNo came to the Rock N’ Roll Hotel, I could attribute 10-15 people being there because they got into it from people who got into it from me. It spread through my friends, Carolyn’s brothers friends, the Ingebrets3n brothers, and more. They are one of the most creative “punk” acts out there. It’s too bad their post-2000 work does not at all stand up to their pre-2000 work. I will also remark that their first album, Mama, clearly has songs that sound exactly like Primus‘s style (lead bass, nasally vocals) — years before Primus hit the scene. But this was not the sound they would ultimately have. It was punk — but only because it lacked classification elsewhere. It was punk with high variance. No two songs sounded a like. Usually, with punk, most songs by the same band sound somewhat alike. Still one of my favorite bands ever.

08. Alternative Tentacles – Virus 100 Dead Kennedys Tribute. Back in my day, sonny — before p2p and bittorrent — if you wanted 1 rare song by a band you lived that appeared on some strange compilation/tribute album… You had to go to the record store, special order the album, and play the waiting game. This album is well known among Dead Kennedys fans, and even among non-fans. I never heard a single Dead Kennedys album until AFTER college, despite the fact that I had this in *high school*. I knew I liked the songs, and I knew I would eventually like Dead Kennedys (Which I do now). What’s the rush? In fact, I would say that for about 80% of the songs on this album — I like them better than the Dead Kennedys version. They’re far more stylized and unique. This is also how I got into Victims Family, a NoMeansNo-produced funky punk band that has some decent stuff (and some stuff that’s not quite as decent). It’s also how Disposable Heroes Of Hyphopcracy got on my radar. I’m not into hip-hop, but they did a spoken word collaboration album with William S. Burroughs (“Spare Ass Annie”), and the fact that I had already heard them do California Uber Allies helped convince me to pony up the cash for Spare Ass Annie after seeing The Naked Lunch movie.

09. WeenPure Guava. After hearing Push Th’ Little Daisies on Beavis & Butt-head, I knew this was a band for me. I wasn’t wrong. This album blew my mind, and introduced me to one of my 3 favorite bands (Ween, The Misfits, Atari Teenage Riot). Listening to Ween has been pretty much a daily occurrence ever since, and Ween is the band I have seen the most times live — 8 (counting the Gene Ween and Gene Ween Band shows). Basically, this album helped expand my love of modern psychedelic music, and greatly influenced my music taste. Although I got this in 1992/1993ish, it was not until about 2001 that I decided Ween was tied for my favorite band. But the voyage started with this AMAZING album. My favorite track? Morning Glory!

10. Saturday Morning Cartoon’s Greatest Hits. Won by my dad in a sweepstakes contest in 1995, I threw this into my 12-disc changer without knowing what to expect. What we were treated to was a bunch of cover songs of cartoon themes. Liz Phair, Semisonic, Matthew Sweet, Juliana Hatfield, Tonya Donelly, Collective Soul, Butthole Surfers, Helmet, The Ramones, Reverent Horton Heat, Frente, Violent Femmes, Face To Face, Tripping Daisy, Sublime, Toadies, The Murmurs, etc. These were, for the most part, bands I never listened to, and to this day am not the slightest bet interested in (except Femmes, Ramones, Surfers, and to a lesser extent Rev. Horton Heat, and The Murmurs who had a great song Beavis & Butt-head watched called “You Suck”). Yet they made an album of songs I absolutely loved — mostly because they didn’t write them. Old, corny TV songs re-done in modern styles. All the soul of the old, and all the style of the new. It was the perfect mashup, and was probably a Top-10 listened-to album in college for Carolyn & I. Sublime turned the 30 second Hong Kong Phooey theme song into 7.5 minutes of sometimes psychedelic reggae madness. Popeye The Sailor became a fast, aggressive, headbanging song. Happy Happy Joy Joy became something that could be moshed to. H.R. Pufnstuff had far more charm than the original. Eep Opp Ork Ah-Ah was the perfect one for Violent Femmes to improve, and improve they did. The whole album was a masterpiece. Later, Schoolhouse Rock! Rocks gave the exact same treatment to the Schoolhouse Rock! songs, with pretty much equal success (including a Ween song, as well as Man Or Astro-Man?’s best song ever, Biz Markie, Lemonheads, Skee-Lo, Moby, Pavement, and such). These 2 albums are in a category of their own.

11. Type O Negative – Bloody Kisses. Best gothic metal album ever? I think so. You just can’t beat songs like Black No. 1, Christian Woman, Blood & Fire, Too Late: Frozen, or We Hate Everyone, and the rest of the album is quite good too. I was a Carnivore fan before Carnivore changed its name to Type O Negative. So this was really the 4th studio album byt hese guys. But it was groundbreaking at the time — their shows are still extremely popular to this day. Type O Negative did for gothic metal what Sisters Of Mercy did for gothic rock!

12.Ministry – In Case You Didn’t Feel Like Showing Up. I first heard the song “Thieves” (with samples from Full Metal Jacket) when I saw D.R.I. (with Bad Religion opening) at the old 9:30 Club. They played it on the speakers in between bands. I went out and got the live album, and to date it is one of my favorite live albums ever. The accompanying video IS my favorite live video ever (and I lost my VHS! Stolen by friends, I assume.) Most of the songs on this album were better than the studio equivalents! They were longer, more aggressive, and had TWO drummers. This began my descent into industrial metal. This album was ultimately responsible for me liking KMFDM, Rammstein, Atari Teenage Riot, Chemlab, Nine Inch Nails (who I got into because of the raw aggression of Broken; I hated Pretty Hate Machine in high school), and Marilyn Manson.

13.Atari Teenage Riot – Burn, Berlin, Burn! Just click on the band name to find other posts where I gush about Atari Teenage Riot. Combining techno, industrial, metal, punk, hip-hop (tiny bit), and noise into a genre they dubbed “digital hardcore” — ATR redefined the very meaning of the word “heavy” for me. Slayer‘s got nothing on these guys. Metallica wishes they could make something this aggressive. Most death metal is too generic and unrelenting to really get me going. These guys get me going. And politically, they are the only band to capture the true rage that we should be feeling with the state of the world and society being what it is today. There other albums are equally as good, but this is what helped me START THE RIOT (one of their songs)! In fact, Atari Teenage Riot has inspired real riots, with riot police, mass arrests, and everything. I’d pay good money to travel back in time and attend that show. Too bad Carl Crack is now dead.

14.Sex Pistols – The Great Rock ‘N’ Roll Swindle. Yes, I know this isn’t “really” the Sex Pistols, and that their only true studio release was Never Mind The Bollocks, Here’s The Sex Pistols. Despite that fact, this was one of the most listened to albums by Carolyn & me in college. It sat in our 12-disc changer for years, just like Saturday Morning Cartoon’s Greatest Hits. Despite it not being “real” Sex Pistols, I found this album to capture a particular essence that made it realer than a real Sex Pistols album. Most Sex Pistols fandom probably considers this to be sacrilege, yet this is how I feel. Don’t get me wrong — Nevermind The Bollocks is a seminal classic. But I might even like the Ex Pistols The Swindle Continues better than Nevermind The Bollocks! Either way. The Great Rock ‘N’ Roll Swindle is the single “Sex Pistols” album that I would have to choose to take to a desert island.

15.Minor Threat – Complete Discography. While I originally owned this as two separate cassettes, they released them onto 1 cd, and I now consider it 1 album, because it all fits on a cd! This is the first song I ever performed in my first band — and I hadn’t even heard the original at that time! In high school, I grew to GREATLY love this. It is some of the best punk that ever existed, and has not been forgotten, like some greats often are. It seems everyone still remembers and loves them. If they were to tour as Minor Threat today, I’m thinking the shows would quite possibly sell out. Too bad Ian MacKaye is a dick and a hypocrite, now seen drinking around D.C. bars despite starting the [stupid] straightedge punk scene. To quote the Undead: “No Vices! How boring it would be if we had No Vices!”

NOTE: No The Misfits albums were included because there are so many The Misfits albums that are varying permutations of the same songs. Thus, any good Misfits song appears on multiple different albums, making it really hard to pick one as being particularly influential.

I wish I had room to include Moistboyz #2, Mr. Bungle #2 (Disco Volante), and The Undead‘s Dawn Of The Undead on this list. But I don’t. I would also consider putting Freezepop‘s Freezepop Forever album on this list, if only because it is an incredible departure from my normal music tastes. I also wonder if The Church‘s Starfish album belongs here for similar reasons.

I’m very happy that George W. Bush has been caught in his lies — again.

First off, it was ridiculous in the first place that he said “nobody ever expected the levees to break.”  My highschool best friend Sam Watson was in the hurricane area, and lives an hour from N’awlins, and has said repeatedly that everybody there expected the levees to break.

What we are seeing is plausible deniability.

Now that videotapes have surfaced showing Bush specifically listening to talk about how the levees will probably break, well — it’s all apparant that he was lying.

You simply cannot be in a conversatoin where you discuss levees may break, then turn around 2 days later and tell the whole country nobody ever expected it.

We impeached Clinton for far less.  Lying about a blow-job is one-millionth the crime that lying about a disaster where people needlessly died is.

Bush should be impeached, imprisoned, and sued.