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VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Small Apartments (2012)

Clio: 4/5 stars, 8/10.
Carolyn: 3.6/5 stars, 7.6/10.
Native ratings: 2.6/5 stars Netflix, 5.9/10 IMDB.

This rating is disproportionately low. Is it because the main character is a fat bald dude who never wears pants the entire movie? C’mon, people. This is that special genre I like to call “FUCKED UP”. Except it’s also a comedy, so it’s not really as fucked up as some other movies (like Gummo, Irreversible). So it’s not really THAT fucked up. At least, the movie makes this fucked up story comical. So I don’t know why people would rate it so low. Fucked up is a boon, funny is a boon. This movie was solid. On par with any major hit you’d see.

It’s just a bit creepier, that’s all.

Based on a book about a creepy guy who seems a little off, finds himself living alone in a small apartment with a cranky old man and a deadbeat stoner for neighbors.  He misses his brother, who is in a looney bin, but sends him cassettes every day.  Then his landlord is accidentally killed, and the fun of watching things unfold begins: People with poor coping skills trying to cope with a situation stranger than most situations most of us will ever have in our lives. That’s entertainment.

We thought this was an interesting movie, full of interesting quirks.

Directed by Jonas Akerlund (who used to mostly direct music videos, but has moved on to “realer” endeavors). Book *and* screenplay are by Chris Millis. Mr. Millis is a book author, not a screeplay writer. This is the only one he wrote. But it was based on his book. Isn’t that nice? A little respect actually being shown to the author? It almost seems quant, but it really should be common sense!

Matt Lucas as the main character (2 eps of Portlandia, Tweedledee & Tweedledum in Alice In Wonderland, Cardinal One from Popetown, Cousin Tom from Shaun Of The Dead).
James Caan as the old next-door neighbor (Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs, Elf, Honeymoon In Vegas).
Juno Temple as slutty teenager (Kaboom, The Dark Knight Rises, The Three Musketeers, St. Trinian’s, Year One).
Saffron Burrows as… the mom?! (Wainy Days, Wing Commander).
Johnny Knoxville as the stoner neighbor (Jackass, The Ringer, Dukes Of Hazzard, A Dirty Shame, Men In Black 2, Coyote Ugly).
The celebrity shrink was Dolph Lundgren (He-Man in the He-Man Movie, Johnny Mnemonic, Dark Angel, Rocky 4).
James Marsden as the crazy brother (Anchorman, Sex Drive, Cyclops in the X-Men movies, and we just recently saw him as the son in Robot & Frank).
DJ Qualls plays a clerk! (The New Guy, Road Trip). Good to see him again.
Peter Stormare as the landlord (1 ep of Adventure Time, 2 eps of Weeds, 1 ep of Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!…No I did not recognize him).
David Koechner as a fire investigator (Anchorman, Final Destination 5, Sex Drive, Talladega Nights, Thank You For Smoking, The 40 Year Old Virgin, The Dukes Of Hazzard, 4 eps of 2011 Beavis & Butt-head, 12 eps of American Dad).
Hell, we even get Billy Crystal here! (Soap, When Harry Met Sally, Analyze That/This, America’s Sweethearts, City Slickers, Howl’s Moving Castle, Monsters Inc.).
The strangest one to pop up was Rosie Perez (Pineapple Express, choreographer on In Living Color). Why do we all recognize her so readily? She’s not really on screen in anything we’ve really seen, other than Pineapple Express.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1272886/combined

2 new photos uploaded just now (October 08, 2018 at 11:49PM).

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1 new photos uploaded just now (October 05, 2018 at 07:20PM).

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2 new photos uploaded just now (October 04, 2018 at 11:00PM).

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VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: My Awkward Sexual Adventure (2012)

Clio: 4.6/5 stars, 8.6/10.
Carolyn: 4/5 stars, 8/10.
Native ratings: 3.7/5 stars Netflix, 6.0/10 IMDB.

This movie might be the perfect intersection of sex comedy and romantic comedy. It was FUN. It didn’t have that “all humor stops here” point that so many romantic comedies have. That’s the sex-comedy influence :) Admittedly the comedy lets off a bit in the last 10%, but the jokes do indeed go all the way to the end, and even into the credits. And it’s not just a bunch of overt sex comedy (not that there’s anything wrong with that)… There’s also some a lot of “cringe comedy”. Awwwkwarrrrrd moments. I mean, they put the word awkward the title for a reason. It’s obvious.

If you were to combine Roger Doger with The 40-Year-Old Virgin… It still wouldn’t be this movie. But it would be close.

This is Canadian, so most people aren’t going to hear about it outside of my review, he types, drunk on power. So I’d recommend this over other movies I post about and like, simply because it’s easy to miss this one.

Plot-wise: Stuck-up girlfriend of boring accountant (who pined for 24 years before dating her) breaks up with him because he’s boring in bed.  They might have been able to work out some sort of alternative lifestyle arrangement regarding that, but instead she just breaks up with him.  This made him have to go on their planned, pre-paid vacation alone.  While on vacation, he tries to make his girlfriend jealous by taking pictures of him posing with strippers.  He ends up befriending a stripper who agrees to help instruct him on being better in bed in order to win back his girlfriend. You’d think it would be raunchy, but no, it really isn’t that raunchy, actually.

Cast-wise: Dudeface is played by Jonas Chernick (Degrassi: The Next Generation) WHO ALSO WROTE THE MOVIE. Stripper-with-a-heart-of-gold is played by Emily Hampshire (Boy Meets Girl, 1 ep of Puppets Who Kill, ‘Misery’ in some animated series called Ruby Gloom that kinda looks interesting). Bitchy girlfriend is Sarah Manninen.  Indian man-slut friend is Vik Sahay (Chuck, American Reunion, Stir Of Echoes 2). Naked Tom (Mike Bell) was in Goon. Dudeface’s androgynous co-worker who really seemed like “Pat” from Saturday Night Live turned out to not be Pat, but Sarah Constible, who was a teacher in 2 episodes of the MOST AMAZING SHOW EVER Todd And The Book Of Pure Evil. The “Mint Girl” was in Todd as well.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2112210/combined

VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Fast Times At Ridgemont High (1982)

Clio: 4.4/5 stars, 8.4/10.
Carolyn: 3/5 stars, 7/10.
Native ratings: 3.8/5 stars Netflix, 7.2/10 IMDB.

We watched a few flashback movies this week, and this was the one we watched right after Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. I thought it was quite comparable to Ferris Bueller, but for some reason, Carolyn disagreed.

Carolyn’s thinking was more along the lines that this movie was alright, but that not much happened plotwise. “It wasn’t particularly hilarious… It was decent, though.”

Basically, it was about one year in high school.  It follows kids around from the first day of school through the last day of school/graduation dance.  You have the hot senior who struggles with finding a good job, you have his sophomore sister struggling to lose her virginity, you have her friend who is dating an older guy, you have the guy who likes the sophomore but is too shy to make a move, you have his best friend who ends up sleeping with the sophomore, and then you have a stoner surfer dude who is barely related to the rest of the cast but is just thrown in so you can have a stoner surfer dude.  And the hardass teacher who just wants to get his class to learn American History, but thinks everyone is on dope.
There were conflicts (losing virginity, dealing with jerks who don’t call after you put out, other jerks who desert you when you need them, best friends sleeping with the girl you like, abortion, getting the girl, etc).
From the director of Clueless, and the writer of Vanilla Sky & Singles. David Lynch was the studio-chosen director, but he didn’t want to do a comedy.
With Sean Penn (Milk, 21 Grams), Jennifer Jason Leigh (Weeds, Road To Perdition, eXistenZ, The Hudsucker Proxy, Single White Female), Judge Reinhold (Stripes, Gremlins, Swing Vote, Arrested Development, he’the Honorable Judge Reinhold in both Arrested Development and Clerks:TAS), Robert Romanus (hey, he was his character from this movie, “Mike Damone”, in one episode of Family Guy! Other than that, he was in American Pie 7: The Book Of Love). Mr. Hand went on to be the only actor to reprise his role in the short-lived 7-episode “Fast Times” TV series.
AND NIC CAGE! NIC CAGE’S FIRST-EVER MOVIE! He has no speaking lines (except in the TV-only version) and is on-screen for only a few seconds. He is credited as Nicolas Coppola.

3 of the actors won Oscars for Best Actor in later movies.

Bonus points for featuring a copy of Artchur C. Clarke’s Childhood’s End book, 14 clips of old-school videogames, and epilogues for the main characters’ ultimate fate after the movie ended. Unlike Carolyn, I think this was a great stoner high school comedy.

LINK URL: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083929/combined