VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Ass Backwards (2013)

Clint: 4/5 stars, 8/10.
Carolyn: 4/5 stars, 8/10.
Native ratings: 2.7/5 stars Netflix, 4.1/10 IMDB. OUCH!

Man, I fucking love June Diane Raphael. She’s so damn hot. I am intensely attracted to her. NTSF:SF:SUV:: is a great show that few people have heard of, and more people should watch. Then I got a movie she was in that I *THOUGHT* was a comedy (Girl Most Likely), and was totally disappointed.

Finally, this. She wrote it too! Along with Casey Wilson, who apparently knows John The Canadien‘s sister or something. Interesting stuff.

So anyway, this was a pretty funny movie.  2 childhood friends who are living in denial about their loserdom decide to go to the anniversary of the childhood beauty pagaent they came in last in….to show that they can win.

But they are so. damn. clueless. If the movie we watched last night (The To Do List) was a female American Pie 1, then this was a female Dumb & Dumber. Romy & Michelle’s Highschool Reunion? Yea, that too.

On the surface, this is a movie about laughing at stupid chicks being stupid. But a bit deeper, it still has some heart. And it tends to send a subversive message of it being okay to embrace one’s own loserdom and inner loserness.

But for the most part, it’s a ridiculous (there’s even a meth subplot) road trip/buddy comedy with two really stupid main characters who [debatedly] mean well…but are just fucking idiots.

They run into some interesting cast members, too, like a much-less-recognizable Vincent D’Onofrio (he shows up in the weirdest places sometimes), Alicia Silverstone (not quite looking as good), Bob Odenkirk (always exaxctly the same), and Paul Scheer (lucky son of a bitch from NTSF:SF:SUV:: who gets to be married to my girlfriend June Diane Raphael).

The nature of a road trip movie is that the tone of the movie gets to jump all over the place, and sometimes with very little notice. And that’s kind of fun. Hop on and enjoy the ride. This was great fun.

It seemed to be rated unusually low on IMDB, though there’s only 437 votes at the time of writing this. I guess a lot of people don’t go for vapid, idiotic main characters. Or movies starring mostly women. Or movies written by women. ‘Tis a shame, because guy-guy buddy comedies involve vapid stupid fucking idiots as well, and that seems perfectly fine with everyone. Personally, I think it’s quite nice to enjoy a female-created movie. It didn’t come off as chick flick at all, I mean it starts with them pissing!

Some said the ending was sad, because they are losers. But it wasn’t sad. They were happy with their lives at the end — arguably happier than they had ever been before. They embraced the fact that not everyone has to be an overachiever — or even an achiever, as well as the fact that material wealth isn’t necessarily the only path to happiness. They grew as people, from vapid losers to less-vapid losers. It’s a happy ending.

Strange real-life coincidence: This movie featured several scenes with the 2 main girls peeing in public, and while watching it, a random guy adds me as a flickr contact, and all his favorites were girls pissing. Don’t believe me? Here are his favorites:

Directed by Chris Nelson. Written by Casey Wilson & June Diane Raphael (my girlfriend).

Starring June Diane Raphael (NTSF:SD:SUV::, Anchorman 2, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Year One, Girl Most Likely, 3 eps of American Dad, 1 ep of Drunk History) as Kate.
Casey Wilson (The Brothers Solomon, 30 eps of Saturday Night Live, 2 eps of The Life & Times Of Tim, 1 ep of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, 1 ep of The Human Giant, 1 ep of Drunk History, 1 ep of NTSF:SD:SUV) as Chloe.
Bob Odenkirk as Pageant MC.
Jon Cryer (Due Date, Two And A Half Men, Hot Shots, Pretty In Pink, 3 eps of Stripperella, 2 eps of American Dad, 1 ep of Family Guy, 1 ep of Mr. Show With Bob & David, 1 ep of Andy Richter Controls The Universe) as Dean, the pageant runner.
Vincent D’Onofrio (Full Metal Jacket, Strange Days, Men In Black, The Salton Sea, JFK, 3 eps of Men In Black: The Series, 2 eps of Xavier: Renegade Angel) as Bruce.
Alicia Silverstone (that Aerosmith video, Clueless, Batman & Robin, 1 ep of Childrens Hospital, 1 ep of The Wonder Years) as Laurel.
Brian Geraghty (The Hurt Locker, 1 ep of The Sopranos) as Brian, the drug addict.
Paul Scheer (Human Giant, NTSF:SD:SUV, Rapture-Palooza, Year One, 5 eps of TRON: Uprising, 4 eps of Fat Guy Stuck In Internet, 2 eps of Childrens Hospital, 1 ep of Bob’s Burgers, 1 ep of The Life & Times Of Tim, 1 ep of Adventure Time) as Strip Club Owner.
Sandy Martin (Grandma in Napoleon Dynamite-TAS, Speed, 1 ep of Weeds, 1 ep of Nip/Tuck, 1 ep of Warren The Ape) as Qwen, the womyn leader.
Marcia Jean Kurtz (Black Swan, Requiem For A Dream, 1 ep of Hope & Faith) as Barb.
Lea DeLaria (Helga in The Oblongs, 1 ep of Friends) as Deb.
Deanna Raphael (1 ep of NTSF:SD:SUV) as Lizbeth.
Johnny Ray Meeks (7 eps of NTSF:SD:SUV) as Jack.


VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: Movie 43 (2013)

Clio: 5/5 stars, 9/10.
Carolyn: 5/5 stars, 8.6/10.
Jesse: “That was awesome.”
iDRMRSR: “Oh this was a GREAT flick. I had to shampoo my reclinar after I watched it I crapped my slacks so many times laughing.”
Native ratings: 3.0/5 stars Netflix, only 4.4/10 IMDB.

This movie took me places I’ve never been before. It gets really low ratings becuase it is too ridiculous, disgusting, and low-brow. But if you like the Family Guy/South Park style of humor, IGNORE THE LOW RATINGS and go for this.

It is a series of about 13 interconnected segments. The framing-device part that encapsulates all of the sketches is probably the worst part. The individual segments range from funny to oh-god-make-it-stop awkward to disgusting to ridiculous.

For example, Hugh Jackman goes on a blind date with Kate Winslet, and he has testicles that hang off his neck. The whole segment is about Winslet’s disbelief at Jackman’s neckticles.

There’s also a super hero speed dating segment.

Great movie that totally exceeded all of our expectations.

BTW, another reason to watch this movie? Ensemble cast. Anna Faris (why do you think we watched this?), Emma Stone, Hugh Jackman, Johnny Knoxville, Kate Winslet, Naomi Watts, Kate Bosworth, Elizabeth Banks, Uma Thurman, Leslie Bibb, Kristen Bell, Seth MacFarlane, Patrick Warburton, Liev Schreiber, Gerard Butler, Seann William Scott, Dennis Quaid, J.B. Smoove, Justin Long, Greg Kinnear, Charlie Saxton, Chris Pratt, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Chloe Grace Moretz, Stephen Merchant… and even Snooki.

Even the directors of the segments include Bob Odenkirk (who wrote his segment) and Elizabeth Banks.

This movie is all over the place, and that’s awesome.


VIDEO: MOVIES: REVIEW: The Giant Mechanical Man (2012)

Clint: 2.8/5 stars, 5.9/10.
Carolyn: 4/5 stars, 7.6/10.
Native ratings: 3.3/5 stars (Netflix), 6.1/10 (IMDB).

It was a chick flick. There wasn’t really any comedy.  A few awkward situations, a few *actors* that are usually funny (Jenna Fischer, Malin Akerman, Bob Odenkirk, Topher Grace, Lucy Punch), but the plot wasn’t funny.

It was mostly depressing, with a love story to defeat the depression of the pointlessness of life.

The “mechanical man” gimmick didn’t really do much for me, pretty much felt like a MacGuffin.

By the end of the movie, I felt very happy for the main characters, but sad that I’d tricked myself into watching something so lacking in laughs.

This is well done. And it’s not bad. It’s just not my cup of tea.

P.S. Lucy Punch PLEASE dye your hair back to red like in Bad Teacher, kthxbye.