[crossposted from Facebook]

  1. I’m a techie. I was the first human being I ever knew to have cable (’79ish), have a VCR (’80ish, $800, separate UHF/VHF knobs), have a personal computer (’80), write a program (’83), get online (’88), record and play music on my computer (’90-91), use the internet (’91), use a TV as a monitor (’95, but my dad did this around 1980), have a webpage (’95), use google (’98ish, I emailed my whole addressbook telling them about it), use a social networking site (SixDegrees in ’98, and not ONE friend accepted my request–people didn’t get that social networking had great potential… it took another 10 yrs for facebook to take off), control lights in my house with a computer (2002ish), transmit audio over FM with my computer (2003ish), use gmail (2004), flickr (2004), or have a YouTube account (2004). Y’all are slow at figurin’ this technawlogee out. Not to toot my own horn (but isn’t that what 25 things is for?), but you might want to follow my lead when I get into new things. I’m often onto things before others. I was called a geek for a lot of these things, then every trendy person on the planet turned around and did most of them 10 yrs later. PWNED.
  2. I first got online in 1988 with a dumb terminal. That means there was no software, and you had to type out most of the phone numbers you dialed (it could store 10) manually. And of course you couldn’t download. No disks. No operating system. No computer. Just a monitor and a keyboard. I called BBSes at 2400bps, 1200bps, and 300bps. 30 characters a second is REALLY slow. It wasn’t long til I had lots of online friends, as well as phoned in death threats to my house.
  3. I once rear-ended a purple limosine. I pretended to be poorer than I was, and the owner, a reverend, never called.
  4. My grandfather started a cult ( http://www.cut.org http://delicious/clintjcl/markprophet ) … Tens of thousands beleived he was divine, and ascended directly to heaven.
  5. I only have mid-digital hair on my left ring finger.
  6. I love warmth, but I think I’d be content with never seeing the sun again. I’ve gone about 3 weeks without seeing it before and it didn’t bother me a bit. But I would be the first in any group to die of exposure if tied to at ree.
  7. I once stabbed my dad in the arm with a fork. I was pretending to, and it broke his skin, and felt just like picking up a piece of cut steak. Gross.
  8. I once slit my dad’s throat with a piece of paper. I was pretending to, and flicked it, and it actually paper-cut his throat. Oops!!
  9. By the time I graduated high school, I had only drinken alcohol 8 times.
  10. I’ve never used chapstick/lip balm, except for 2 times that I’ve taken so much Mucinex that it dried me out. I really don’t understand why it’s so critical for people.
  11. I’m 35, and I still get carded if I shave. Yet my first legal drink at 21, they didn’t card me. WTF.
  12. My 3 favorite bands are Atari Teenage Riot, The Misfits, and Ween. They sound NOTHING like each other. (I prefer punk & metal, yet only The Misfits squarel fall into that.)
  13. I didn’t learn to really talk or use a toilet until I was 3, but I could read by the time I was 4 (before kindergarten), and at an adult level by 7. Listening to other kids read out loud in class was always EXTREMELY painful. I first corrected a teacher in kindergarten; I was right, she was wrong.
  14. I’ve never been out of the country. (Canada at age 3 doesn’t count!)
  15. I dislike being in public, because there are rules. True freedom only exists on private property.
  16. I’ve been tested as typing at 104WPM with 99% accuracy. (Temp agency, college)
  17. We had our first computer when I was about 5 or 6 (kindergarten, 1979-1980). I wrote my first computer program around age 8 (3rd grade). It merely printed to the screen that my high score in bowling was 30. Ha!
  18. Because I learned how to program for loops by copying my dad around age 8 or 9, I thought the loop control variable always had to be called “T”. For YEARS. (Nowadays I use $i!)
  19. I have Gilbert’s Syndrome. Basically, glucoronyl transferase enzyme deficiencies cause abnormal bilirubin (what makes your pee yellow, a byproduct of broken down hemoglobin) levels in my blood, making me succeptible to a harmless form of jaundice and possible bouts of fatigue (which would explain a LOT). But it lowers your rate of heart disease and artery hardening. Bacon, here I come. If my skin or eyes seem a bit yellow, this is why.
  20. I prefer to floss with plastic (10-pack-o’-gum bags, sandwich bags). Plastic never cuts your gums, and you can fold it over for farther apart teeth, use the edge, or use the middle for strange-shaped teeth gaps (a crown is only worth replacing so many times before you accept having a “food trap” shape between 2 teeth). Also, the dental tape (not floss) kicks ass for the same reasons — but plastic is free. I do keep floss around. At work, in my car, at home. It’s a basic emergency need. People not having it is how I discovered the plastic trick: Parties where the host has no floss tend to have smokers present, and the cellophane from a pack of cigarettes works just as well (But it’s stronger than plastic, and CAN make you bleed.)
  21. I have no friends my age who have been in a relationship as long as I have, and wonder if I ever will.
  22. I once refused to sneeze for a period of several years. And was successful.
  23. It seems like my tendons NEVER heal. Pull my back? 3 years of agony. Walk on sand? 9 months of constant discomfort [so far]. Any unknown treatments for this?
  24. I’ve had surgery 3 times, but only one was “real”/asleep surgury. Nodule in my thumb, and a radicular cyst in my gums (twice, it grew back even tho it’s not cancer). You’d think with all this, I’d be lumpy… but I’m not. Unless you count a gut. But that doesn’t have lumps.
  25. I didn’t learn to swim until my parents bribed me with a stereo at age 13. I despise water. If I were one of the 4 “elements”, I’d be fire. Then earth. Not air, and definitely not water.
  26. I’m a 3rd gen I.T. guy. We’re a rare breed. But it’s harder to find work if you don’t want to help kill people.

Mood: foothurty

Music: Kreator – Second Awekening